Apologies this is taking so long. I'm not actively trying to procrastinate. I just have the attention span of- SQUIRREL!
#90: "No Limit" by Usher feat. Young Thug
Usher is an R&B artist who has had hits for over a decade now, but he frustrates me by being inconsistent. For every song of his I like ("More", "Yeah!"), he has a crap song ("OMG", "I Don't Mind"). Young Thug is a rapper that I covered last year, as he was a featured artist on "Lifestyle", which was a song that I could not get behind because it seemed to be the worst kind of throwback to the rap songs glamorizing gang violence.
The music doesn't do a lot for me. The intro has a bass synth line that sounds more like the music that you expect to hear during the suspenseful parts of a mediocre movie, but that bass synth isn't the only music in the song. There are also hip-hop/trap drums that you can practically see the drum machine on, as well as a higher pitched synth line. Unfortunately, the singing isn't much better. Usher may have a decent voice, but here, he is totally detached from the song, and his lack of care is easy to tell by listening to him. As for Young Thug, he shows why he has had most of his success as a featured artist. He sounds all right in parts of his guest verse, but he also loses control of his pitch at times, clearly struggling to maintain consistency, a major issue as a rapper.
This song is basically about trying to pick up a girl and impressing her with your money. Usher and Young Thug both basically say the same thing: they are rich, and can buy the girl anything she wants, with no limits.
I know a lot of people aren't crazy about Kanye West, but one of his first hits, if not his first hit, was a song called "Gold Digger", which tore down a woman for purportedly only being interested in his wealth. Well, fast forward 12 years, and rappers have apparently decided having gold diggers after them is a good thing. Unfortunately, the problems with this song extend well beyond the lyrics. The music is mediocre at best, and Usher doesn't even seem to be trying. Young Thug is trying, and hits the mark about 75% of the time, but that's not good enough to save this song.
#89: "Back to Sleep" by Chris Brown
I try not to judge Chris Brown by his assault against Rihanna. Let's face it, that was a decade ago, and people need a chance to redeem themselves if they want that chance. Problem is, Chris Brown's music seems to express a decided lack of concern over his past behavior, and in fact reinforces that nothing has changed him. Still, I'm going to try to go into this with an open mind.
This is a very weird beat. There is a slow synth line that is normally used for slow, "deep" songs, with a prime example being the theme for "Free Willy". Underneath that synth line, however, is some almost tribal drums and a second synth line, this one reminiscent of "Africa" by Toto. Strangely, it all works decently together, even if the music itself doesn't really seem to grab my interest. Chris Brown himself is abusing Autotune a bit too much, but when he isn't using it, has a voice that is a bit whiny, but not exactly unpleasant. His big problem is trying to go outside his limited range.
This song is about sex. Specifically, Chris Brown wants to go over to a girl's house and, in the uncensored version, "fuck you back to sleep, girl." Oh, and he specifically says "Don't say a word no, don't you talk". Because that's somehow romantic.
Honestly, it sounds like I hated this song, but I found it more mediocre than anything. The lyrics are a bit generic when they aren't trying to strike a balance between "sexy" and "crude" and failing, the music is unremarkable, and the same could be said for Chris Brown. That said, Chris Brown has made far worse songs, and quite honestly, I don't mind seeing him at least try to be romantic, even if his idea of romance is adolescent.
#88: "Watch Me" by Silento
This is a re-review, as this song was on last year's list. I specifically recall putting it at the top of my list of the worst songs of 2015. Round 2.
The music is a bit annoying, but does have a strange charm. The main unique feature of the song is a synth line that sounds like a loop from some kind of NES game. There is also a synth line that features the "hit two keys repeatedly" method of writing music. Silento has one of the, if not the, worst voices in rap. He sounds like he is about 12, rather than 17 as he actually was at the time.
The lyrics to this song are pointless. They are just listing a bunch of dance moves, and telling you to do them. He isn't telling you how to do them, because the dance moves he lists off are all dance moves that you are already supposed to know from other songs.
I think I was too hard on this song last year. Don't get me wrong, it is a terrible song. Silento has absolutely no rapping talent, sounding like a middle schooler rather than a senior in high school, and the lyrics are meaningless even for rap. However, at least he is having a good time, and the music does have some strangely interesting things going for it. I still don't ever want to hear it again, though.
#87: "All the Way Up" by Fat Joe, Remy Ma, and Jay Z feat. French Montana and Infared
OK, this will take a while. Fat Joe is a rapper and CEO of Terror Squad Entertainment. He's been around for a while, being a member of Terror Squad for their first and only hit in 2004 "Lean Back". Remy Ma is a female rapper, and fellow member of Terror Squad, and was in the group for "Lean Back", but she's also had some slight success as a solo artist, with her sole record cracking the top 20 on the Rap Albums chart. Jay Z should not need an introduction, but just in case, he is a rapper who has been around since the mid-90's, with a total of 13 number-one albums, the most of any male artist in Billboard history. French Montana is a hip-hop recording artist who broke out in the South, despite being from New York. He was featured in a top 10 hit in 2013, Chris Brown's "Loyal", which I reviewed and...did not like. Finally, Infared is a DJ. The reason for the scant information is that I can find very little information on the Internet about him. There's not even a Wikipedia page.
Once again, the music is pretty interesting. Besides the bass drop that every rap song must have, the main music is a synth line that sounds almost like what you'd hear in a film noir movie. You know, the music that would be playing during the "She walked into my office one night" scene.
The artists do pretty decently. Infared and Jay Z do the hook, which is decently catchy as a hook should be. French Montana, who gets the bridge, is definitely the weak part of the song. His flow is about as smooth as sandpaper. Jay Z gets the first verse, and shines with flow. Fat Joe gets the second verse, and while not as smooth as Jay Z, makes up for it with emotion, clearly selling the lyrics as best as he can. Remy Ma gets the third verse, and shows that she has quite a skill with flow, even ten years after her big success, even if she doesn't exactly shine in the field of emotion. She also puts inflection on one line ("All in that bus, locked me all the way doooooooown/ now I'm all the way up")that sounds suspiciously similar to something that Nicki Minaj does in a lot of her songs. Given the word chosen, I like to think she was jabbing at Nicki Minaj, and doing so in a pretty cleaver way.
The lyrics are all pretty much what you expect. All three rappers brag about how they are on top, although all three do it in a different way. Jay Z is essentially bragging about how important he is and how rich he is, Fat Joe focuses more on how he has managed to move with the times and outlast the Terror Squad's decline in popularity, and Remy Ma is essentially treating this song as a comeback for her, saying she's stealing back the crown that she let others wear.
As a rule, I tend to dislike bragging rap songs. As another rule, I've discovered that the more artists are involved with a song, the worse it tends to be. This song broke both those rules. The beat by Infared is unique enough to give the song an identity without taking focus from the rappers, and all three of the main rappers show how different rappers can do the same thing and sound different doing so. Even French Montana's lackluster bridge doesn't take away from how this song is. It may not top my list this year, but it's definitely on the way up.
#86: "I Know What You Did Last Summer" by Shawn Mendes feat. Camila Cabello
Shawn Mendes is a Canadian singer-songwriter that I reviewed last year, as "Stitches" reached #36 on that chart. I found the song to only be remarkable for a pretty complex acoustic guitar line for what was otherwise a painfully "white guy with guitar" song. Camila Cabello was, until recently, one of the members of Fifth Harmony. Which would make them Fourth Harmony now, I guess.
Once again, the guitar line isn't too bad, with quite a bit of energy to it. However, it doesn't quite have the complexity of "Stitches", relying heavily on chords. Vocally, Camila Cabello sounds terrible, sounding like a whining teenager most of the time despite being...well, she is 19, but she still sounds obnoxious. As for Shawn Mendes, he has the same voice as just about every White Guy With Guitar.
This song is basically a dual confession/confrontation. She is confessing that she cheated on him, he is demanding that she tell him the truth. He knows what she did last summer, and more importantly, that she wasn't alone. Now he must track her down and kill all of her and her...oh, wait, that's the movie. My bad.
I did not care for this song. The music had a nice energy to it, and the lyrics could have worked in the hands of better singers, but both Camila and Shawn butcher that. She sounds way too young, and in the process sounds like she's playing dumb and doesn't know what the big deal is, while Shawn Mendes is just not the kind of singer that can do the anger and hurt that is necessary to have in a song about this subject. This song has the potential to be good, but only if someone does a cover of it.
Don't you love it when you go into a list, only having hopes for one song, and that song is the only one that delivers?
Previously: #95-91 [http://www.escapistmagazine.com/forums/read/326.945308-2016-Billboard-Review-95-91]
Next: #85-81 ("Lean On" by Major Lazer and DJ Snake feat. MO, "Hide Away" by Daya, "When We Were Young" by Adele, "Pop Style" by Drake feat. The Throne, and "On My Mind" by Ellie Goulding)
We'll be seeing a bit more of at least one of those artists. Well, besides Drake. That one is a given.
#90: "No Limit" by Usher feat. Young Thug
Usher is an R&B artist who has had hits for over a decade now, but he frustrates me by being inconsistent. For every song of his I like ("More", "Yeah!"), he has a crap song ("OMG", "I Don't Mind"). Young Thug is a rapper that I covered last year, as he was a featured artist on "Lifestyle", which was a song that I could not get behind because it seemed to be the worst kind of throwback to the rap songs glamorizing gang violence.
The music doesn't do a lot for me. The intro has a bass synth line that sounds more like the music that you expect to hear during the suspenseful parts of a mediocre movie, but that bass synth isn't the only music in the song. There are also hip-hop/trap drums that you can practically see the drum machine on, as well as a higher pitched synth line. Unfortunately, the singing isn't much better. Usher may have a decent voice, but here, he is totally detached from the song, and his lack of care is easy to tell by listening to him. As for Young Thug, he shows why he has had most of his success as a featured artist. He sounds all right in parts of his guest verse, but he also loses control of his pitch at times, clearly struggling to maintain consistency, a major issue as a rapper.
This song is basically about trying to pick up a girl and impressing her with your money. Usher and Young Thug both basically say the same thing: they are rich, and can buy the girl anything she wants, with no limits.
I know a lot of people aren't crazy about Kanye West, but one of his first hits, if not his first hit, was a song called "Gold Digger", which tore down a woman for purportedly only being interested in his wealth. Well, fast forward 12 years, and rappers have apparently decided having gold diggers after them is a good thing. Unfortunately, the problems with this song extend well beyond the lyrics. The music is mediocre at best, and Usher doesn't even seem to be trying. Young Thug is trying, and hits the mark about 75% of the time, but that's not good enough to save this song.
#89: "Back to Sleep" by Chris Brown
I try not to judge Chris Brown by his assault against Rihanna. Let's face it, that was a decade ago, and people need a chance to redeem themselves if they want that chance. Problem is, Chris Brown's music seems to express a decided lack of concern over his past behavior, and in fact reinforces that nothing has changed him. Still, I'm going to try to go into this with an open mind.
This is a very weird beat. There is a slow synth line that is normally used for slow, "deep" songs, with a prime example being the theme for "Free Willy". Underneath that synth line, however, is some almost tribal drums and a second synth line, this one reminiscent of "Africa" by Toto. Strangely, it all works decently together, even if the music itself doesn't really seem to grab my interest. Chris Brown himself is abusing Autotune a bit too much, but when he isn't using it, has a voice that is a bit whiny, but not exactly unpleasant. His big problem is trying to go outside his limited range.
This song is about sex. Specifically, Chris Brown wants to go over to a girl's house and, in the uncensored version, "fuck you back to sleep, girl." Oh, and he specifically says "Don't say a word no, don't you talk". Because that's somehow romantic.
Honestly, it sounds like I hated this song, but I found it more mediocre than anything. The lyrics are a bit generic when they aren't trying to strike a balance between "sexy" and "crude" and failing, the music is unremarkable, and the same could be said for Chris Brown. That said, Chris Brown has made far worse songs, and quite honestly, I don't mind seeing him at least try to be romantic, even if his idea of romance is adolescent.
#88: "Watch Me" by Silento
This is a re-review, as this song was on last year's list. I specifically recall putting it at the top of my list of the worst songs of 2015. Round 2.
The music is a bit annoying, but does have a strange charm. The main unique feature of the song is a synth line that sounds like a loop from some kind of NES game. There is also a synth line that features the "hit two keys repeatedly" method of writing music. Silento has one of the, if not the, worst voices in rap. He sounds like he is about 12, rather than 17 as he actually was at the time.
The lyrics to this song are pointless. They are just listing a bunch of dance moves, and telling you to do them. He isn't telling you how to do them, because the dance moves he lists off are all dance moves that you are already supposed to know from other songs.
I think I was too hard on this song last year. Don't get me wrong, it is a terrible song. Silento has absolutely no rapping talent, sounding like a middle schooler rather than a senior in high school, and the lyrics are meaningless even for rap. However, at least he is having a good time, and the music does have some strangely interesting things going for it. I still don't ever want to hear it again, though.
#87: "All the Way Up" by Fat Joe, Remy Ma, and Jay Z feat. French Montana and Infared
OK, this will take a while. Fat Joe is a rapper and CEO of Terror Squad Entertainment. He's been around for a while, being a member of Terror Squad for their first and only hit in 2004 "Lean Back". Remy Ma is a female rapper, and fellow member of Terror Squad, and was in the group for "Lean Back", but she's also had some slight success as a solo artist, with her sole record cracking the top 20 on the Rap Albums chart. Jay Z should not need an introduction, but just in case, he is a rapper who has been around since the mid-90's, with a total of 13 number-one albums, the most of any male artist in Billboard history. French Montana is a hip-hop recording artist who broke out in the South, despite being from New York. He was featured in a top 10 hit in 2013, Chris Brown's "Loyal", which I reviewed and...did not like. Finally, Infared is a DJ. The reason for the scant information is that I can find very little information on the Internet about him. There's not even a Wikipedia page.
Once again, the music is pretty interesting. Besides the bass drop that every rap song must have, the main music is a synth line that sounds almost like what you'd hear in a film noir movie. You know, the music that would be playing during the "She walked into my office one night" scene.
The artists do pretty decently. Infared and Jay Z do the hook, which is decently catchy as a hook should be. French Montana, who gets the bridge, is definitely the weak part of the song. His flow is about as smooth as sandpaper. Jay Z gets the first verse, and shines with flow. Fat Joe gets the second verse, and while not as smooth as Jay Z, makes up for it with emotion, clearly selling the lyrics as best as he can. Remy Ma gets the third verse, and shows that she has quite a skill with flow, even ten years after her big success, even if she doesn't exactly shine in the field of emotion. She also puts inflection on one line ("All in that bus, locked me all the way doooooooown/ now I'm all the way up")that sounds suspiciously similar to something that Nicki Minaj does in a lot of her songs. Given the word chosen, I like to think she was jabbing at Nicki Minaj, and doing so in a pretty cleaver way.
The lyrics are all pretty much what you expect. All three rappers brag about how they are on top, although all three do it in a different way. Jay Z is essentially bragging about how important he is and how rich he is, Fat Joe focuses more on how he has managed to move with the times and outlast the Terror Squad's decline in popularity, and Remy Ma is essentially treating this song as a comeback for her, saying she's stealing back the crown that she let others wear.
As a rule, I tend to dislike bragging rap songs. As another rule, I've discovered that the more artists are involved with a song, the worse it tends to be. This song broke both those rules. The beat by Infared is unique enough to give the song an identity without taking focus from the rappers, and all three of the main rappers show how different rappers can do the same thing and sound different doing so. Even French Montana's lackluster bridge doesn't take away from how this song is. It may not top my list this year, but it's definitely on the way up.
#86: "I Know What You Did Last Summer" by Shawn Mendes feat. Camila Cabello
Shawn Mendes is a Canadian singer-songwriter that I reviewed last year, as "Stitches" reached #36 on that chart. I found the song to only be remarkable for a pretty complex acoustic guitar line for what was otherwise a painfully "white guy with guitar" song. Camila Cabello was, until recently, one of the members of Fifth Harmony. Which would make them Fourth Harmony now, I guess.
Once again, the guitar line isn't too bad, with quite a bit of energy to it. However, it doesn't quite have the complexity of "Stitches", relying heavily on chords. Vocally, Camila Cabello sounds terrible, sounding like a whining teenager most of the time despite being...well, she is 19, but she still sounds obnoxious. As for Shawn Mendes, he has the same voice as just about every White Guy With Guitar.
This song is basically a dual confession/confrontation. She is confessing that she cheated on him, he is demanding that she tell him the truth. He knows what she did last summer, and more importantly, that she wasn't alone. Now he must track her down and kill all of her and her...oh, wait, that's the movie. My bad.
I did not care for this song. The music had a nice energy to it, and the lyrics could have worked in the hands of better singers, but both Camila and Shawn butcher that. She sounds way too young, and in the process sounds like she's playing dumb and doesn't know what the big deal is, while Shawn Mendes is just not the kind of singer that can do the anger and hurt that is necessary to have in a song about this subject. This song has the potential to be good, but only if someone does a cover of it.
Don't you love it when you go into a list, only having hopes for one song, and that song is the only one that delivers?
Previously: #95-91 [http://www.escapistmagazine.com/forums/read/326.945308-2016-Billboard-Review-95-91]
Next: #85-81 ("Lean On" by Major Lazer and DJ Snake feat. MO, "Hide Away" by Daya, "When We Were Young" by Adele, "Pop Style" by Drake feat. The Throne, and "On My Mind" by Ellie Goulding)
We'll be seeing a bit more of at least one of those artists. Well, besides Drake. That one is a given.