237: Getting Back in the Game

[Logan Westbrook]

Getting Back in the Game

Breaking up is hard to do, especially when it's the unexpected dissolution of a ten year relationship. Gaming doesn't fill the hole left behind, but concentrating on a pixelated hero helps keep the negative emotions from being the focus of one's life. Logan Westbrook recalls how gaming helped him cope.

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[wilsonscrazybed]

I am glad to see you write this, I hope it somehow helped you deal with your loss.

 

[Beefcakes]

While it may not be on such a level as yours, I use gaming to cope with not particularly fun aspects of life...
I know how it can feel, but definitely not a level like that, I certainly do feel for you

On a lighter note, games are quite an escape, no?
And people think there only used for evil...
(Thats only right most of the time...)

 

[messy]

Now my breakup was no where near the level of yours, however I had no consoles nearby (none in my uni accommodation) so instead I found playing "Like a rolling stone" by Bob Dylan at hight volumes an adequate "cure".

Something about the line "How does it feel..."

 

[NewClassic_v1legacy]

I find the most common problem with the human mind is its uncanny ability to focus almost exclusively on the negatives, and it's then that hobbies really take the center stage. It's why people coping with loss are advised to keep busy, as opposed to any sort of thinking or dwelling.

I really do think that games aren't really awarded enough for the little things they accomplish. Media's often too-happy to point gaming's subtle effects on violent behavior, but rarely do they want to talk about the positives. Articles like these are heart-warming (although its somewhat saddening that such a story has to come from such unfortunate circumstances), and remind me that there's good both in media as a whole, and from the writers that make up the industry.

 

[wilsonscrazybed]

Now my breakup was no where near the level of yours, however I had no consoles nearby (none in my uni accommodation) so instead I found playing "Like a rolling stone" by Bob Dylan at high volumes an adequate "cure".

Something about the line "How does it feel..."

I did this [http://bf2s.com/player/43995540/]after a bad breakup. All in one summer pretty much.

 

[LorChan]

I find that whole thing interesting, because I was a casual gamer my whole life until my dad died. After that I got into it a lot more, and somehow during the proccess I fell in love with video games.

I suppose it makes a lot of sense for me, in context. I've been a gamer as long as I can remember, but it had never been a big part of my life. My dad taught me how to play Sonic the Hedgehog on the Genisis when I was a kid, and we played racing games and snowboard games when I was a tad older. I already ownend a Genisis, PS2, DS, and Wii at the time. Not that I played the Genisis anymore, but...
Anyway, I think it was the Christmas after that I was in the mall with my mum and I bought Metroid Prime 3: Corruption. I got Twilight Princess for Christmas as well. A few months later I bought an Xbox 360. I'm proud to say I never looked back.

I think gaming really is as Logan Westbrook said; a deviation from the situation. A way to keep your mind occupied. For me it became something to care about. And without a doubt it's better for you than movies or TV, as great as they may be. Gaming you actually have to focus on, and you feel a lot more of it. When you watch a movie, the simplest thing can remind you what you're trying to forget. You can let your mind wander and become more depressed. With gaming you feel what the developers want you to feel - if they're good at it. It's the benefit of interactive media. You feel frustration fighting through a level, you feel joy finishing it. You feel satisfaction, you feel disapointment. It's a great thing.

 

[Deviluk]

Just like LorChan, my dad died last year, and since then, my brother and I have become the most lethal modern warfare soldiers, the most powerful pair of Paladins in azeroth, and trophy hoarders to a ludicrous extent.

Its something to fill the time, and concentrate on. Now though I am moving on to more productive things, like learning the piano and guitar, becoming a regular writer for a certain creative website and going to the gym more often.

 

[ccesarano]

While I did like this article at the start, it felt like it went nowhere. I get the point being that video games help you cope, keep your mind focused on something else until the pain can gradually recede on its own, but it felt as if a greater point was left out. The beginning was great, but then it's basically "played this game, then this game, then this one".

Good start, and I enjoyed it conceptually, but I was expecting a little more...substantial conclusion? I dunno.

(Gee, and after the editor's note, here I am criticizing someone else's work. Well, at least I try writing this sort of stuff myself instead of offering nothing but criticism).

 

[Zerog65]

I can't say I understand about the break up or losing a job but my deep dive back into gaming came from the loss of a chunk of my family it may not fix the problems but they deffinetly can help to make things move a little easier, if for anything just to make us forget that this stuff has happened to us and I guess for some to let us pretend that we are someone else.

 

[InvisibleSeal]

What a really heartfelt article. I agree with you completely: as much as people can claim games are a waste of time, sometimes that is just what people need to settle their mind and get back on their feet.

It's nothing compared to what you went through, but when I moved to another country away from my family I emmersed myself in games while my mind got used to the situation.

 

[messy]

Now my breakup was no where near the level of yours, however I had no consoles nearby (none in my uni accommodation) so instead I found playing "Like a rolling stone" by Bob Dylan at high volumes an adequate "cure".

Something about the line "How does it feel..."

I did this [http://bf2s.com/player/43995540/]after a bad breakup. All in one summer pretty much.

We can safely assured now you don't do things half heartedly.

Also I when I was dumped I found all the various uni parties/going out were a good distraction

 

[Thedutchjelle]

When I got rejected for the xth time, I needed something to be angry at and to keep my mind busy - I launched Unreal Tournament 2004 with the Ballistic weapons mod. Then, God mode and unlimited ammo. Many confused bots were blown to shit that day. Games really help to keep your mind away, more than a movie or a book.

 

[TyroSe7en]

huh... good stuff, I like this article a lot

 

[khululy]

Gaming the most healthy anti-depressant ever.

 

[BlicaGB]

Heh, I remember main-lining City of Heroes and drinking straight whiskey for a week and a half after my last bad break-up, which was 2 weeks before my birthday. I feel your pain bro. I really do.

 

[Sir Prize]

Whilst I know nothing of break-ups or job loses, I do understand how games can help out when things seem too much, mainly from the emotion side of things.. I'm glad you wrote this piece.

 

[Rowan Kaiser]

I read a study, and now for the life of me I can't remember much, but it talked about the usefulness of doing brain-catching things for maintaining emotional levelness. As a gamer (and generally a very calm person) I immediately applied the concept to games. They force one to live in the moment, not regretting the past, not fearing the future.

 

[carpathic]

Quite a brave article. It can be hard to cop to the need for escapism in our lives. The chance to play a hero when you feel like a douche. I guess games are one of the few places in our lives where we have a chance to make the outside story commensurate with the inside one.

 

[Alex_P]

I think this is the first thing I've read that has truly convinced me that the much-talked-about idea of "escapism" is a good thing. Simple but clear, Logan. Thank you.

My experience with games as a distraction has been more negative. I know I'm in the dumps when I start looking to video games to fritter away my free time. I enjoy 'em well enough, but they feel empty, too. Games make it easier to put myself in a holding pattern; they give me an easy sink for all my restless energy, but then that energy isn't going towards actually changing my situation. I'd rather not do that, although sometimes it's hard to make the choice.

-- Alex