7 Reasons why Skyrim thinks the Dovahkiin is retarded.

[Skipper3]

1. Quest Markers

Grab a quest then go to the quest marker. Want to turn off the quest marker? Well too bad, cos' there's no information beyond "kill sewer farts" to tell you where to go.

2. NPC Dialogue

Want to have a conversation with a NPC? Well too bad because NPC has nothing to say to you. Except to bark the following sentence to you incessantly: "I WORK FOR BELATHOR, AT THE GENERAL GOODS STORE!" Or if they do have something to say it'll be like about two things, and nothing else. Ever!

3. No one dies

Are you an assasin with a personal agenda wanting to change the tide of battle towards the imperials favor? Well too bad because Ulfric Stormcloak and many others has this weeks issue of impenatrable plotarmor only to be removed when the plot calls for it. Sadly, this magical god-like enchant disappears whenever you equip the armor yourself.

4. No one cares

You killed the evil world ender; Alduin! Guess what? No one gives two major shits. But they will tell you this..."I WORK FOR BELATHOR, AT THE GENERAL GOODS STORE!"

5. Caves and dungeons are bright.

Enter a 10,000 year old virgin cave or dungeon; Feel dumb for packing torches.

6. Npcs are dumb.

Head shot a npc with a stealthy arrow? Expecting a harrowing search? Well too bad you'll get this instead: "MUST BE HEARING THINGS" Or alternatively! Give em a stealthy shot in the face, while facing you, in a brightly lite room..."MUST BE HEARING THINGS"

7. Puzzles are easy.

The following is an actual puzzle solving scenario: "Oh! A Puzzle! How do I sol- Oh!.. The answer is right behind the puzzle..

 

[spartandude]

in terms of the important NPCs not dying its because due to the radiant AI the can be killed by anything anywhere regardless of player actions, as such you would likely find your self in a situation where someone was killed a by a troll and now you cant complete the main quest. in fact their are mods which although for them to be killed but most people turn it off very quickly after testing it out

other than that i do agree with you on your other points

 

[Thedutchjelle]

Yeah I feel the same about the NPCs chat.
There is still that one guy in Whiterun that says I never go to the Cloud District, despite being you know, the guy who whooped Alduin and has property in every city.

The same generic stuff. Bleh. NPCs are also incredibly naive : Hey random person! Could you bring this priceless artifact to my niece on the other side of the nation?

 

[Doom972]

1. I don't like quest markers much either, but in a big open world RPG it's necessary.

4. That's why it's best to keep the main quest for the end. I think that it's understandable why they didn't change all the NPC barks after the completion of the main quest.

6. I agree with you on that, but I actually find it very amusing.

I completely agree with the rest of it.

in terms of the important NPCs not dying its because due to the radiant AI the can be killed by anything anywhere regardless of player actions, as such you would likely find your self in a situation where someone was killed a by a troll and now you cant complete the main quest. in fact their are mods which although for them to be killed but most people turn it off very quickly after testing it out

other than that i do agree with you on your other points

I'm sure that if they wanted to, they could've made it so that when attacked by the player character, those NPCs become vulnerable.

 

[BathorysGraveland2]

1. I don't like quest markers much either, but in a big open world RPG it's necessary.

Really? Morrowind and the Gothic games disagree with you. It is very possible to have a large, open game with directions that don't treat you like a moron.

 

[piinyouri]

I think the core problem with quest way points is they have become literally part of the game worlds they are used in. All you need is to add a bit of text from the quest giver to say "Follow that floating odd, unexplainable shape floating over there to get to where you need to go. Instead of being a nice helping hand that doesnt directly interfere with the game world, it's become almost sentient. A character unto itself as far as the game in question's universe is concerned.

I think it'd be a great deal more balanced if you had an NPC describe or tell you where to go on their own, and then have the quest markers as an option, thereby only appearing when you yourself actually need the help.

But then again, try to make everyone happy and you'll make no one happy so what do I know.

 

[Jimmy T. Malice]

Yeah I feel the same about the NPCs chat.
There is still that one guy in Whiterun that says I never go to the Cloud District, despite being you know, the guy who whooped Alduin and has property in every city.

The same generic stuff. Bleh. NPCs are also incredibly naive : Hey random person! Could you bring this priceless artifact to my niece on the other side of the nation?

They're not naive. They know that the Dovahkiin has been mentally conditioned to be unable to drop or sell a quest item.

 

[Thedutchjelle]

Yeah I feel the same about the NPCs chat.
There is still that one guy in Whiterun that says I never go to the Cloud District, despite being you know, the guy who whooped Alduin and has property in every city.

The same generic stuff. Bleh. NPCs are also incredibly naive : Hey random person! Could you bring this priceless artifact to my niece on the other side of the nation?

They're not naive. They know that the Dovahkiin has been mentally conditioned to be unable to drop or sell a quest item.

Oh yes, how could I forget about the 20 gemboxes that I can't get rid off because I don't want to join the thieves guild. I had to install a mod for that -.-

 

[SajuukKhar]

1. Quest Markers
2. NPC Dialogue
3. No one dies
4. No one cares
5. Caves and dungeons are bright.
6. Npcs are dumb.
7. Puzzles are easy.

1. Every single radiant quest has the quest location's name stated in the journal, and all radiant quest locations, except guild ones, are in the same hold they are assigned. You shouldn't need directions unless you are too dumb to open up the map, and look at the small 1/10 of the gameworld that the hold you got the quest in encompasses, to find the location.

2. What person IRL would just tell a random stranger who came up to them their life story? The NPCs say little because they realistically would say little to a random stranger.

3. That's because NPCs can die due to reasons beyond your control, and as the Dawnguard DLC vampire attack's show, the attacks which caused epic level of rage because they ended up killing entire towns, people HATE that.

4. First off, NO ONE outside The Blades or The Greybeards knew Alduin was back. Secondly, you killed Alduin in Sovengarde, the realm of the dead, how the fuck is anyone supposed to know you did it? They don't care because they DON'T KNOW, and have no reason to.

The civil war and the death of the emperor are other matters however, and it is retarded no one cares about those events.

5. Its explained in a book that the Draugr wake up in turns and keep tombs in the best shape that they can. Which is why torches are lit.
http://www.uesp.net/wiki/Skyrim:Amongst_the_Draugr
"Every day, a different set of draugr would awaken, shamble their way to the sarcophagus of their priest, and prostrate themselves before it. Several hours of this, followed by a meticulous cleaning of the area. It would appear that the adherents of the dragon priest continue their worship of him in death, which would also explain the ferocity with which they defend his chambers."

6. I can actually agree with this, though NPCs do search for like two minutes before giving up.

7. The puzzles in dungeons are actually designed to keep the Draugr in, not keep people out, which is why they are easy to solve. There is a book that explains it somewhere. they simply aren't meant to be hard.

 

[mad825]

in terms of the important NPCs not dying its because due to the radiant AI the can be killed by anything anywhere regardless of player actions, as such you would likely find your self in a situation where someone was killed a by a troll and now you cant complete the main quest. in fact their are mods which although for them to be killed but most people turn it off very quickly after testing it out

Cheap, the fix is cheap.

There are many other methods such as level altering, give important NPCs More health/Stamina/magicka and better weapons and armour <you know, like they did in morrowind>. Alternatively or possibly in conjunction they could improve the AI. For example, when a dragon attacks a town, the NPCs run indoors just like this mod [http://skyrim.nexusmods.com/mods/23906/?].#

An extract from the mod description:

This was born out of frustration at seeing the citizens all trying to be a hero and rushing headlong to their doom attacking dragons. Instead, the citizens will run to safety like smart people should when faced with the horrors of giant flying fire breathing lizards.

So yes. Skyrim thinks the Dovahkiin is retarded.

 

[Guy from the 80's]

Stores running out of money. I had so much dragon scale/bones that walking to a city took forever, I reach the store and the merchant only has 800 gold. Great.

edit> And brawls. Takes forever, only 2 moves (hard and light punch) and consist of running in a circle beating the npc.

 

[Chris Tian]

I agree with everything, except this one:

3. No one dies

Are you an assasin with a personal agenda wanting to change the tide of battle towards the imperials favor? Well too bad because Ulfric Stormcloak and many others has this weeks issue of impenatrable plotarmor only to be removed when the plot calls for it. Sadly, this magical god-like enchant disappears whenever you equip the armor yourself.

Thats kind of a must have, for me, in a world like Skyrim where Dragons swoop down on everybody on a regular basis. I hate nothing more than to having to reload a Dragon fight X times because the Dragon wants to rather duke it out with some unarmed questgiver I need, than with me.

Its also because the world doesnt react to anything you do, I mean you can kill the f*cking Emperor and absolutely nothing happens. So being able to kill Ulfric just to have nothing happen, and just being stuck on a major questline would be an equal buzzkill.

 

[Pipotchi]

6. I agree with you on that, but I actually find it very amusing.

.

Agreed, nothing cracks me up more than an NPC returning to his patrol with a "I must have imagined it" when he's got an arrow sticking out of his head lol

 

[Jayemsal]

1. Quest Markers

Grab a quest then go to the quest marker. Want to turn off the quest marker? Well too bad, cos' there's no information beyond "kill sewer farts" to tell you where to go.

2. NPC Dialogue

Want to have a conversation with a NPC? Well too bad because NPC has nothing to say to you. Except to bark the following sentence to you incessantly: "I WORK FOR BELATHOR, AT THE GENERAL GOODS STORE!" Or if they do have something to say it'll be like about two things, and nothing else. Ever!

3. No one dies

Are you an assasin with a personal agenda wanting to change the tide of battle towards the imperials favor? Well too bad because Ulfric Stormcloak and many others has this weeks issue of impenatrable plotarmor only to be removed when the plot calls for it. Sadly, this magical god-like enchant disappears whenever you equip the armor yourself.

4. No one cares

You killed the evil world ender; Alduin! Guess what? No one gives two major shits. But they will tell you this..."I WORK FOR BELATHOR, AT THE GENERAL GOODS STORE!"

5. Caves and dungeons are bright.

Enter a 10,000 year old virgin cave or dungeon; Feel dumb for packing torches.

6. Npcs are dumb.

Head shot a npc with a stealthy arrow? Expecting a harrowing search? Well too bad you'll get this instead: "MUST BE HEARING THINGS" Or alternatively! Give em a stealthy shot in the face, while facing you, in a brightly lite room..."MUST BE HEARING THINGS"

7. Puzzles are easy.

The following is an actual puzzle solving scenario: "Oh! A Puzzle! How do I sol- Oh!.. The answer is right behind the puzzle..

I think its far more likely that the people of Skyrim see so much crazy shit every day, that they dont really give any fucks when you save the world, you did your job, dont be a diva about it.

SOME MAY CALL THIS JUNK, ME I CALL THEM TREASURES.

 

[Jayemsal]

I agree with everything, except this one:

3. No one dies

Are you an assasin with a personal agenda wanting to change the tide of battle towards the imperials favor? Well too bad because Ulfric Stormcloak and many others has this weeks issue of impenatrable plotarmor only to be removed when the plot calls for it. Sadly, this magical god-like enchant disappears whenever you equip the armor yourself.

Thats kind of a must have, for me, in a world like Skyrim where Dragons swoop down on everybody on a regular basis. I hate nothing more than to having to reload a Dragon fight X times because the Dragon wants to rather duke it out with some unarmed questgiver I need, than with me.

Its also because the world doesnt react to anything you do, I mean you can kill the f*cking Emperor and absolutely nothing happens. So being able to kill Ulfric just to have nothing happen, and just being stuck on a major questline would be an equal buzzkill.

You dont kill the Emperor, you kill a double.

 

[Eclectic Dreck]

1. Quest Markers

That's more of a nod to playability than anything else. Skyrim covers several square miles and finding a particular door or spot, especially if you've not been to the dungeon before, can be a chore. I enjoy exploration when it's on my own terms. When it's forced, what it effectively achieves is wasting my time.

Back in Morrowind, I recall spending entire play sessions just looking for the place I needed to go to advance the quest.

2. NPC Dialogue

There are two reasons at the heart of this. The first is that all lines of dialog given by NPCs are voice acted and as such it is relatively expensive to get a character to say something. The second is that simply generating appropriate dialog (even if one had a system for producing reasonable voice work on command) for a wide variety of circumstances is not particularly easy to do on the fly and the process is remarkably computationally expensive - something the Xbox and PS3 could ill afford.

3. No one dies

This goes back to the fundamental problem of scaling complexity. Letting a plot important character die is a trigger that produces two possible scenarios if you know precisely when and where they will die. If you let that happen arbitrarily, suddenly complexity scales where every quest even tangentially related has to have a different state depending on if this key figure is alive or dead.

The only tenable solutions to this issue is to simply break any and all associated quests once the key figure dies or simply ignore the death and assume some mook took over.

Neither solution is any more satisfying to the average person I'd think.

4. No one cares

I'd utterly agree on this point. Even if my exploits aren't known, being snottily asked if I "Get to the Cloud District very often" when I am physically wearing or holding objects worth more than the entire city is silly. Regardless of what a bystander knows about me, you'd think wearing a suit of armor the likes of which they've never seen (Say my Ebony armor) would earn at least a bit of deference. Or, in that same city, getting the same snotty question after I've been declared thane and own property in the city.

That actually remains my number one disappointment with Skyrim. I saved the world and no one noticed. Then I won a civil war for one side or the other, performed feats of strength that will be retold for centuries in song and have risen to the top of multiple guilds with a significant public presence all while gaining drastic and obvious improvements in the gear I display on my person and people still treat you like a peasant.

5. Caves and dungeons are bright.

This is a nod to playability more than anything. I understand entirely why they did it and it doesn't bother me. I recently started playing the game again on PC and among the mods I downloaded is one that makes light sources actually important.

6. Npcs are dumb.

Stealth is only possible in video games in one of two ways: magic (Thief, for example, actually made the character invisible to NPCs if you were stationary in a shadow and crouched - it was even referred to as magic in the manual) or NPC stupidity. Beyond that is the fact that AI is computationally expensive and, even if you dedicate plenty of power for the purpose, it is still difficult to produce any sort of tangible improvement.

7. Puzzles are easy.

The first time I encountered each of the two main puzzle types I enjoyed it greatly. Then I did it another 30 times and it got super old. The thing that kills me is that they demonstrated an ability to present puzzles differently and even did it a few times. I recall one version of a dungeon where you are given a short set of lines describing the order in which you needed to flip switches based on a minor riddle for example. Even if it was still basically "look for the obvious solution in the room" the fact that it required more than noticing the answer explicitly carved into the wall was refreshing.

 

[Something Amyss]

Most of the list is just "why I don't like Skyrim" and has nothing to do with its attitude towards the protagonist or player.

 

[omega 616]

Change skyrim to any game ever.

Why are you attacking Skyrim, one of the most realistic medieval games ever! Sure there are a number of bugs and it's not like "woah! it looks so real!" but come on, give a game a break!

It packs content in like few other games do, there is only so much you can ask with current technology. In 20 or 30 years time we will look back on Skyrim the way we look back on pong, as lacking but at the moment it's still on top of the tree in my eyes.

It's not my favorite game but it's still pushing the amount of content you can get on a disk.

 

[Cabisco]

Or is it hinting at a deep subtle interpretation thinking that the dragonborn is ACTUALLY retarded and the NPC's all just play along to make him/her feel better? Because that's better.

That is an amazing concept and makes me want to replay Skyrim under the assumption Dovahkiin means 'special'. The game actually makes a lot more sense this way, 'Oh I went to a magical dream land and killed a dragon to save us all' 'Yeah ya did Dragonborn, it's not like you just had a weird dream or anything... you're so Dovahkiin sometimes'.