Are you a manwhore?

[Glorious manwhore]

Hello, I want to tell the Escapist, about my hobby and I want to see if there are any others like me.
I am a manwhore, with chocolate eyes and I will tell you to gaze into them, I'm a musician and my music is so great that it will sterilize.
So I ask the escapist, are you a manwhore? Are you one of those proud men that hunt walruses and go for women, that are way out of our league.

Are you a manwhore? If you are, then share your stories.

I do have a story about me being a manwhore, it was back in the days, where I went out partying and I drank too many beers.
There I saw a woman who looked very sexy, at the time.
So I talked to her and dragged her home. Where later that morning, I saw that she had the face of a walrus, so I threw her into the sea with her other manatee friends.

There! I've shared one of my legendary stories!

 

[Rawne1980]

and go for women, that are way out of our league.

I was a manwhore until I met my wife but i've never met a lass that was out of my league.

Then again I am incredibly vain with an ego the size of a small country.

But I think all of us who have taken part in the mystical art of nightclub pulling have woken up next to a she beast or two.

I say mystical art because it takes a certain level of talent to aim for the more attractive women once a few shandies have been consumed.

You walk into a club, you see the lass with the hooked nose, hump back, club foot and 5 o clock shadow and you swear to yourself you will avoid her lest your penis melt. The only issue is that after enough ale to knock out a horse she starts to look like Aphrodite herself and it isn't long until you end up back at her house doing the weekend waltz in the bedroom.

It isn't until you wake up the next morning and end up in a situation where chewing your own arm off is preferable to waking up the female equivalent of Quasimodo that is asleep on it .... drooling into your armpit.

It is then you make that promise to yourself that never again shall you sleep with a mutantette.

That promise lasts until you next consume an olympic sized swimming pools worth of alcohol and again wake up next to Vanessa Feltz's older and much uglier sister.

 

[Lord Beautiful]

I share my tortured groin for hard-earned coin.

Gaze into my chiseled abs.

 

[Dags90]

Not anymore, I've been on a bit of a self imposed dry spell. But back in the day, when I had just turned 18 or so, yeah. I was sort of making up for lost time I guess. At one point I had sex with three different guys over five days, including one midday hookup just before class.

 

[burningdragoon]

Nope. Not even close. I suppose that was a... colorful tale of yours though. Not sure I would call it legendary, unless it was literally a walrus. That would be something.

 

[Doclector]

In short, I f***ing wish.

In long, if I don't get laid soon, my nether regions will gain sentience and somehow hold the world to ransom with nukes.

Captcha: fait accompli. I'm not sure what it means, but I'm pretty sure the captcha just insulted me.

 

[Glorious manwhore]

I share my tortured groin for hard-earned coin.

Gaze into my chiseled abs.

My rhymes will grab you by the throat and ride you like a sturdy goat.

 

[Lord Beautiful]

I share my tortured groin for hard-earned coin.

Gaze into my chiseled abs.

My rhymes will grab you by the throat and ride you like a sturdy goat.

I am a whore of some renown.

(I forget the two verses between. Which is sad, considering I know nearly every other one by heart.)

 

[Glorious manwhore]

I share my tortured groin for hard-earned coin.

Gaze into my chiseled abs.

My rhymes will grab you by the throat and ride you like a sturdy goat.

I am a whore of some renown.

(I forget the two verses between. Which is sad, considering I know nearly every other one by heart.)

Yogurts dish best served chilled, I forgot to get my prescription filled..


But are there no real manwhores on the escapist? I'm so let down.

 

[JaceArveduin]

I'm going to hazard a guess and say it's cause we tend to spend our weekends playing games instead of going out and getting shitfaced.

 

[Lord Beautiful]

Yogurts dish best served chilled, I forgot to get my prescription filled..


But are there no real manwhores on the escapist? I'm so let down.

Damnit, man, that's a different song!

Also, I'm guessing there aren't very many manwhores here. I would be if anyone would show some damned interest.

 

[BOOM headshot65]

short answer: no

Long answer:

Spoiler: might get some sour responces

Get over here so I can slap you silly! People like you make me sick. You should be going after a girl because you like her and want to spend the rest of your life with her, you have similar interest, and NOT because you want to bump uglies. That should not even be on the list.

 

[Colour Scientist]

short answer: no

Long answer:

Spoiler: might get some sour responces

Get over here so I can slap you silly! People like you make me sick. You should be going after a girl because you like her and want to spend the rest of your life with her, you have similar interest, and NOT because you want to bump uglies. That should not even be on the list.

What's wrong with bumping uglies?

 

[Dags90]

What's wrong with bumping uglies?

I find that bumping uglies regularly helps prevent people from mistaking "horny" with "want to spend the rest of my life with you". It's a good thing.

 

[Vault101]

What's wrong with bumping uglies?

he thinks its wrong because it is

I've gone into that argument and that's all I came out with, save yourself the headache

 

[NeutralDrow]

Nah, not a manwhore. I just come pre-whipped.

...um.

*rimshot*

 

[Aprilgold]

Gaze into my straight yet culry hair, which is it? Straight? Curly? You shall never know.

I don't know, I think I would whore myself on the street for the joys of being a bottom but I don't want the shame / HIV or STI's associated with it.

 

[BeerTent]

Man you guys are hardcore. I wish I could rhyme like that all the time!

Personality and standards of a manwhore. Check.
All other attributes of a whore... Well... Sadly, I need money, and poverty is at my door.

 

[LetalisK]

Used to be. Now I'm married to someone who I was searching for all along.