Call off the rescue.

[Random Argument Man]

In the world of gaming, you'll probably meet the "damsel in distress" or the one that's been captured scenarios.

Sure, it's a reason like any other to play the game. Sometimes though, you're sitting there saying to yourself "Fuck it, this person ain't worth it". You quit the game and then pass on your next kidnaped person.

Which person in gaming do you think doesn't deserve a rescue? Was it due to the story, the gameplay or something else?

By the way, let's take Peach and Zelda out right now.

My example is : The princess in Super Ghost N Ghouls. A. The game is too hard B. They force you to redo the levels...twice.

 

[Mr.Pandah]

In the world of gaming, you'll probably meet the "damsel in distress" or the one that's been captured scenarios.

Sure, it's a reason like any other to play the game. Sometimes though, you're sitting there saying to yourself "Fuck it, this person ain't worth it". You quit the game and then pass on your next kidnaped person.

Which person in gaming do you think doesn't deserve a rescue? Was it due to the story, the gameplay or something else?

By the way, let's take Peach and Zelda out right now.

My example is : The princess in Super Ghost N Ghouls. A. The game is too hard B. They force you to redo the levels...twice.

Guess my vote goes to SGnG as well. I did all of that stuff too. Except, I got up to the last boss and a treasure chest popped open and I accidently grabbed the weapon and lost the "secret" weapon and couldn't fight the last boss because of it. I shut the game off after hours of pure torture. I vowed never to play that game again.

 

[FalloutJack]

Wow, you took out two-thirds of all 'damsel in distress' games in one shot.

Okay, so...hmmm. AHA! Yes, I seem to recall this being a problem in Ninja Gaiden. Do I need to explain why?

 

[Gxas]

Modern Warfare 2. Why the hell would I want to save Virginia? Have you been to Virginia? Booooring!

 

[Internet Kraken]

Colette in Tales of Symphonia.

Something bad happens to her about every 10 minutes. Almost everything you do in the game revolves around saving her. And no matter how many times you do save her, you can guarantee that something else will come along to fuck everything up again. I have to admit, she's not actually that bad of a character. After all, it's not usually her fault that she ends up in these situations. The universe just seems to have a massive grudge against her. But the number of times you have to save her just causes her presence in the game to be incredibly annoying.

 

[Heart of Darkness]

Why, the Damsel from Spelunky, of course. Not only does she get stuck in walls (literally), but you have to rescue her every damn level, and then keep her safe from danger (lava, spikes, arrows, and such) until you get her to the exit. She's great as a projectile weapon, though.

 

[stone0042]

Modern Warfare 2. Why the hell would I want to save Virginia? Have you been to Virginia? Booooring!

Wow, now I know I'm overtired. Took me three reads to realize you typed Virgina, and not vagina

 

[Magnatek]

Going to a similar game to SGnG, I'd say the princess from Maximo. I mean, sure, your whole purpose is to find her, but look who's beside you. That's right. It's Death, your new best friend! Who needs a princess when you have the Grim Reaper on your side?

 

[Phyroxis]

Chel.

 

[Spiner909]

ANY person that needed rescuing in Mercenaries 1 or 2. Especially the journalist that had to 'die in an accident'.

 

[j0frenzy]

Colette in Tales oh Symphonia.

Something bad happens to her about every 10 minutes. Almost everything you do in the game revolves around saving her. And no matter how many times you do save her, you can guarantee that something else will come along to fuck everything up again. I have to admit, she's not actually that bad of a character. After all, it's not usually her fault that she ends up in these situations. The universe just seems to have a massive grudge against her. But the number of times you have to save her just causes her presence in the game to be incredibly annoying.

you know, I was actually going to post something different until I was reminded of Colette. God, I forgot how much I hated her and having to rescue her.

 

[Internet Kraken]

Modern Warfare 2. Why the hell would I want to save Virginia? Have you been to Virginia? Booooring!

Forget MW2, the worst damsel in distress was the shitty-ass helicopter pilot in CoD4! She, along with everyone else in the helicopter that saved her, died in a nuclear explosion because she can't fly for shit.

That always bothered me. Sure it's noble that you fought to rescue the helicopter pilot (even though it meant losing other equally valuable soldiers in the process), but doing so caused all of you to die. The nuclear bomb was pretty much just a massive "fuck you" to the player because it made that rescue entirely pointless.

 

[MrLumber]

The planet, you know in every game you have to save the planet. Sure I like the planet but generally these games are in the future so we should have some better options by then, or so I would hope.
I suppose my main grudge would be that the planet rarely repays you, it just continues rotating apathetically as though you have done nothing to prevent its untimely destruction.
Also the planet gave way to one of the cheasiest one liners ever:"The fate of the WORLD depends on it/us/me!".

 

[Arcadia2000]

Holy crap, I got this one. Colette. Tales of Symphonia.

I was just replying to someone a bit ago that had a real hate on for the main protagonist, Lloyd. But Lloyd was useful. Colette... to put it nicely, we wanted her to suffer from Aeris syndrome. To put it meanly, we wanted her to DIE. Sheena being only slightly more useful.

Spoiler: an actual spoiler

Who at least wasn't dying of becoming an angel. I'm sorry. That's messed up.

Don't get me wrong, I like the game, but between the axe-wielding midget, the siblings and their craziness, crap summon system, Mr. Footsie, and the we-totally-yoinked-your-character-so-let's-give-you-a-more-annoying-carbon-copy one... that game has ISSUES. But yeah, Colette can go die. She's not a princess, and kidnapping isn't the focus here, but you definitely spend time saving her. And we'd rather not.

Edit: Omg, I was just Ninja'd. TWICE. 0.o

 

[Arcadia2000]

I just thought of another! =D

...What about Ashley? RE4 anyone? >=)

Seriously, screw that chick. Zombies with chainsaws means it's time to go home and leave a nuke behind.

 

[imp_spittle]

Although not a technically a damsel (and not actually requiring rescuing, if I recall), Tata from Chrono Trigger. Actually, I'm going to expand that to any child character that gets the marvelous delusion they are some legendary hero and need to be rescued because they went on a quest with a wooden sword or squirt gun or some other nonsense.

To quote George Carlin: "The little boy that swallows too many marbles doesn't grow up to have children of his own." You're too stupid to tell the difference between playtime fantasy and the real slobbering monster, then you have officially earned yourself a Darwin award, and kindly done so before spawning.

 

[LeGrotesque]

Mayu from Fatal Frame 2. Or really anyone from the Fatal Frame series.

 

[Pegghead]

I honestly think this spot has to go to Doms wife in Gears of war 2. I loved the game, but let's seriously think about this. The entire fate of the world hangs in the balance, monsters are rising up all around the world, you and your friends are all very big men with regenerating health, chainsaw machine guns and badass suits of armour. So whenever Dom has another tantie about his **** of a wife I can almost feel blood coming from my eyes.

But just for the record, if there's ever been one damsel (Okay it's not politically correct but shut up) in distress who's ever made me WANT to save them it has to go to your Dad...in Fallout 3 that is. I mean,who wouldn't want to save Liam Neesons life if he was in danger...and it meant you could spend hours driving shells into the kneecaps of super mutants.

 

[Samurai Goomba]

Jade Empire.

Let's just say you're trying to rescue somebody you shouldn't be saving. It's even more frustrating on repeat runs when the game won't let me kill certain characters I know are lying scumbags.

 

[Internet Kraken]

I just thought of another! =D

...What about Ashley? RE4 anyone? >=)

Seriously, screw that chick. Zombies with chainsaws means it's time to go home and leave a nuke behind.

When a character only exists for you to save them (like Princess Peach and Ashley Grahm), I'm not actually bothered by them. Yes they are helpless, but at least they're supposed to be. That's part of their character. What pisses me off more is when a character that is an independent bad ass at one point is suddenly screaming for someone to come save them.

And that's another reason why I hate Colette. She's the fucking Chosen. People born for the sole purpose of protecting the world from devastation. And yet she is helpless for a good portion of the game. Even though she has the power to slaughter most enemies you encounter.