Could you be a Househusband/Housewife?

[Elfgore]

Forewarning: This is not a place to discuss gender issues. This is meant to a fun question, not start another gender war. If you see an opinion you disagree with, please refrain from hitting the quote button and starting something.

The Scenario

You and your partner for the past three years have just graduated college. You got married straight out of college and now own a home together. As it turns out, your spouse got lucky and got a well-paying job with plenty of chances to advance. It turns out that they can easily afford to pay all the bills and afford any future plans you may have. You on the other hand are still looking for a job. Your spouse proposes a solution to you.

The Question.

Could you live as a househusband/housewife for your spouse? Now of course you will have to do household chores. You just can't sit and play video games or watch TV all day. You have to cook, clean, etc. Divorce is of course always a possibility. I'm not big expert on divorce cases, but I believe the person with the smallest wage receives alimony. So fellow guys, I know househusbands can get a lot of shit for not being the bread winner. Could you handle that? Women, (if this is sexist in anyway or not the ideas of feminist, my deepest apologizes.) it seems it has become more unpopular for women to be housewives and move into the workforce. Could you handle that?

TL;DR: Read the title. Remember keep things civil and explain your reasoning.

My Answer: I could. Housework has always been easy to me. Cleaning never bothered me and with modern technology advancing it has become easier. I'm not the best cook in the world, but I'm sure I could learn with the aid of a few cooking classes. I have no problem with my wife making the money. Social norms never bothered me anyway.

Edit: Kids are optional. If they change your answer, go ahead and put two answers.

Also for those speaking of working, for this situation I will allow a 16 hours a week job.

 

[Casual Shinji]

Yes.

Yes I could.

The housework and cooking could prove to be a bit of a challenge, but I really don't mind sitting at home. Actually I'm not a very outgoing person anyway. I've never even gone on vaction. So having a woman that I love and that loves me provide for me so that I don't have to work? Sounds like sweet deal to me.

 

[Ryotknife]

No.

Don't get me wrong, I cook, clean, and do laundry as it is right now, but yea that sounds boring.

 

[Barbas]

These are all valuable skills that I'd like to learn and enjoy doing, so I guess it's a yes from me as well. Having a well-kept and clean home is a source of pride.

 

[Mr Fixit]

Lets see.. She can handle all the bills & all I gotta do is clean & stuff? Hell yes I could do that. I'd even cook for her & give back rubs after a hard day & all that stuff, the ladies like that anyway.

And for people giving me shit about it, I don't give a damn. House work can be a very hard job in itself & that's not even taking children into account.

 

[Phasmal]

Of course I could.
I did when me and boyfriend moved out for 6 months.
It's not that hard.
Pretty boring though.

I enjoy cooking and baking, so I'd have no problem with that.
Laundry, I hate, but it has to get done, so I'll do it.
Cleaning is fine too, I used to be able to clean our little flat in like an hour, so it's not hard.
The only thing that used to piss me off was doing washing up. It always felt like I was washing up all the freaking time.

Do you know what is annoying though?
Because I've done this in the past, when boyfriend was working, now I'm working, I'm finding myself heckling his housekeeping skills (which to be fair are kind of shitty).
And I'm not one of those `Oh fine I'll do it then if you're shit at it` girlfriends, sort yourself out and do it properly!

 

[JoJo]

Yeah, if my partner was willing to support me I could go for that. All the household chores are still easier than my current 8 hours a day, 5 days a week job, and I do love being lazy.

 

[Colour Scientist]

Definitely not.

I'd get so bored being cooped up in a house all of the time cleaning up after others and only getting out during the day to do grocery shopping.
Striving for a decent career has always been a major factor in my life, I can't imagine ever giving up that independence in favour of living off of someone else's wage.
I would never want to have to rely on anyone else for my financial stability if I had the option not to.

I have no problem with anyone who chooses to do it, it's just not for me.

 

[Eamar]

I have a deep-seated need to have my own money, so no.

Even if/when I settle down with a long term partner and we share finances, I'm going to insist that we both keep a portion of our own money separate. I just wouldn't feel secure unless I had some savings of my own for emergencies. The one piece of life advice that's stuck with me from my grandmother (who obviously grew up in a time when it was normal/expected for women to be largely dependent on their husbands) was to always keep a separate bank account. No matter how great your relationship is, you never know what might be around the corner. My gran's marriage was always very happy, but she saw friends get completely screwed over by their lack of (financial and general) independence when things turned sour.

I also wouldn't be able to shake the idea that I'd be completely dependent on my partner, and I wouldn't be ok with that. I'd feel like a child, or like I was being "kept" (seriously no offence meant to anyone who's happy with being a househusband/wife, this is just how I'd feel, rational or not).

Similarly, I don't think I'd feel comfortable with a partner who was a househusband/housewife long-term.

Short-term would be different. I'd be happy to take on the housewife role while I was looking for work, but only on the understanding that it wouldn't be permanent. I've kinda done this in the past, though there was another housemate who also helped out around the house, and I got a job pretty quickly.

TL;DR: I have no problem with the actual tasks involved with being a housewife, but I need to be financially independent, at least to some extent, so I'd definitely need my own job in the long-run.

 

[Someone Depressing]

...I spend my day reaing, eating, cooking, cleaning, and peeing anyway.

Aside from having sex and all of that other intimate, love-felt crap that is the bread and butter of humanity, I don't see how my life would be much different.

 

[Kevlar Eater]

No. I'd rather live alone than be a househusband, not because of the whole 'househusbands don't get much respect from either men or women' bit (though that bit plays into why I don't wanna be one), but because I'm not privy to being the slave in a relationship. Bedroom, maybe, but I don't wanna feel like a car, to be used for a few purposes and then 'fixed' and/or discarded when it stops working properly.

Personally, I could not live with myself if I were reduced to that. And to clarify in advance, I will not belittle those who choose to be housewives/husbands, it's their choice.

 

[Phasmal]

No. I'd rather live alone than be a househusband, not because of the whole 'househusbands don't get much respect from either men or women' bit (though that bit plays into why I don't wanna be one), but because I'm not privy to being the slave in a relationship. Bedroom, maybe, but I don't wanna feel like a car, to be used for a few purposes and then 'fixed' and/or discarded when it stops working properly.

Personally, I could not live with myself if I were reduced to that. And to clarify in advance, I will not belittle those who choose to be housewives/husbands, it's their choice.

I'm not sure what your idea of housewives/husbands is, but it's a very strange one.
If your partner treats you like a slave, your domestic roles are not the problem.
And I say this as someone who's been both the housegirlfriend and the breadwinner.

 

[Tiger King]

hmmm not sure.
I kinda have been one for a few weeks while I was having xmas holidays but my other half had to work.
I cleaned and cooked, really enjoyed cooking actually.

but after a few days I started getting bored, really bored.

I don't like being inactive either, it makes me feel tired like I have no energy or something.
Lastly I believe it would be a bit of a waste. I don't think I'm special in anyway but I reckon I should be amounting to more than just sitting at home all day.

If I had kids and more errands to run I imagine things would be a lot more interesting though.

 

[an annoyed writer]

I'd much rather not be a housewife, thanks. I hate being cooped up in my current home as-is, and a life consisting entirely of maintenance of the home would get old quicker than a one-night stand with The Flash. Plus, I hate being fully dependent upon others, and I'd much rather have a good fallback in case there's a divorce or something else happens.

 

[Fappy]

If I still have time for myself and can do some measure of work from home I would have no problem with it at all. I wouldn't be very good at cooking and cleaning, but I could probably learn XD

Also, I guess it depends how much I like my kids, lol. Hopefully I don't have little demons >.<

 

[Scarim Coral]

Yes considering that I can spend a whole day inside the house and be fine with it. While I don't like cleaning and doing the laundry althought I do like cooking but I'm willing to be better at it if it mean I don't have to work.

Don't get me wrong, in that scenario, I would still probably look for a part time job (less than 16 hours) just to be on the safe side for both of us (in case she lost her job and it would somewhat keep me sane).

Beside it's not like I have to clean (vacumming) and do the laundry every single day.

 

[Chemical Alia]

I don't think I could ever do that, I have too many goals and a strong drive to create. If I go more than a few days without working on some art, I start to go crazy.

As for staying at home, I've been working at home since October, and I thought I might have devolved into some kind of rudimentary cave monster by this point but I actually have never been happier.

But I would feel like I was wasting my life, so absolutely not.

 

[Artina89]

No I could never be a housewife as I would get bored far too quickly, I have to always be doing something, plus I like having my own money, I hate other people buying me things unless it is for christmas/birthday, otherwise I feel like I haven't earned it, and I would never feel like it would be my property. That, and in the event of a divorce I think it would definitely help me career wise if I didn't have big gaps in my C.V.