Ctrl+Tab: Heir [Day Three of the 12 days of Ctrl+Tab]

[Blydden]

On the third day of Christmas, Ctrl + Tab [http://www.escapistmagazine.com/groups/view/Ctrl-Tab] gave to me... Three giant colossi
Two running zombies [http://www.escapistmagazine.com/forums/read/326.250970-Ctrl-Tab-Sonny-Day-Two-of-the-12-days-of-Ctrl-Tab]
And a gnome tied to a chimney! [http://www.escapistmagazine.com/forums/read/326.250760-Ctrl-Tab-Garden-Gnome-Carnage-Day-One-of-the-12-days-of-Ctrl-Tab]

Heir

[http://www.kongregate.com/games/ArmorGames/heir]​

And now for something completely different to take a break from my [most likely drunk] singing employer, an actual review!

Heir is a game by Antony Lavelle (in association with ArmorGames). It is a tribute to something called Shadow of the Colossus, a game I haven't played because it (GASP) COSTS...MONEY! I can also assume it also partially tributes God of War, which is also a game I haven't personally played because, well, see the reason above.

The story goes like this: An odd "plaque" "plague" has risen up and taken the form of 3 horrible monsters who start making the pitiful rest of the world cower in terror. A king puts up an employment poster for someone to make these three limbering hulks explode. The reward for success? Being the terminally ill king's next heir to the throne. However, the task of making said plague explode is so horrifying a task that no one steps up to the task for six whole months. Then, a Pale Man of the North with a Russian accent and a love of cocktails steps up to the task. But, then,...oh, hold on a sec, telephone. Uh huh...I'm spoiling too much? Sorry...sorry, I said I'm sorry ok?! *hangs up*

Anyway, the gameplay consists of killing a number colossi (insert Shadow of the Colossus) by crawling up their orifices, inside their intestines, and all over their stony hides (insert God of War). It is essentially a platformer, jumping from bodily gallbladder to bodily liver until you climb up to their head so you can stick your sword up one of its glowing arteries. Of course, these are mighty colossi, so let's not forget about the obligatory spikes all over their stomachs. Besides the story mode, there is also a time-trial for each level, in case you weren't already masochistic enough.

It isn't without its faults, most notably the camera. It is a bit tipsy, not helped by the tremor-causing roars of the colossi as they wonder why a white little insignificant adventurer is standing on their eyebrow. Also, the twist ending has pretty much condemned Antony Lavelle to either A) make a sequel or B) be sent to the fiery pits of Nessus for all eternity.

Those two things definitely shouldn't get in the way of you playing, dear Celestia no. Anyway, the game shouldn't take you more than a half-hour, at the very very most. Probably not even going to make a dent in your busy 3rd day of Christmas. Speaking of, merry 3rd day of Christmas, everyone!