Martintox Presents: Disorder Reviews
Rating System
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THE MAPS OF MEMORY
Rating System
I have a new album and a new Disorder Reviews blog. I have also recently had a stroke, but I feel better now.
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THE MAPS OF MEMORY
The past few days have been hectic, let me tell you. That stroke, losing the Disorder Reviews IP, having to review for the rest of my life to overcome the crippling debt from the invasive brain surgery, watching anime, finding out I have erectile dysfunction from the aforementioned surgery... it's given me a lot on which to ponder, and I have certainly done a lot of that. In fact, once I had regained the ability to think coherently, still lying atop the coffee table on which Farida made the operation, I quickly began to wonder how things came to this. What made me think it was a good idea to write a review while playing strip poker with my feet? Why have I, Mr. Disorder, decided to create Disorder Reviews in the first place, let alone continue for a whopping six weeks? It was humbling to realize how easily time slips through your fingers, but most of all, in that moment of post-stroke clarity, I felt a profound solitude that I wish never to experience again. There is only one Mr. Disorder out there; how miserable it can be to discover this at such a low point.
In the days that followed, as I worked on my review for Garzey's Wing, there came to my mind the words of a friend which, for the sake of protecting his anonymity, will be known as Sigurd. Being a long-time weed farmer and vendor, he has dedicated years of his life to meditate on the notions of the transcendental, but his favorite topic is, by and large, the inextricable link between our perception of reality and our ways of conveying it. His philosophy relies on what he calls the "maps of memory"; in the shortest terms possible, what we "see" is more reliant on our memory than what our senses actually perceive. Strange as this may seem, the reasoning becomes clear the more you read into it. We do not merely remember events through what we observe on an objective level; we associate them with how we felt at the time, and that alone goes a long way in influencing how we recall any tangible person, object, or location. If you were to, say, return to your childhood home after many years, the experiences you've had there will have a non-negligible impact on what you see then. If you've had particularly pleasant or unpleasant times in a certain room, it will likewise be pleasant or unpleasant to revisit it, even when it has changed in appearance down the line.
Now, I already know what you're thinking: "no shit, Mr. Disorder, you remember with your emotions rather than with details, you're not the only one who watched Blade Runner 2049". It's an understandable sentiment, but the implications of this extend far beyond the mere concept of reminiscence. Due to this bias in our memory-making process, the fact of the matter is that our perception of the world is therefore potentially far from what is actually there before us. In some cases, this issue can become outright crippling. I believe that this is what happened to me on that coffee table: the shock of the stroke had profoundly tainted the value that I once held in Disorder Reviews, and this led me to question my motivation in keeping the project alive for all this time. It's no wonder that I felt so alone; rarely will people experience so suddenly an accident of this magnitude. I was, for all intents and purposes, entirely isolated from the perspective of others due to this stroke-sized chasm.
Fortunately, I did mention that Sigurd has thought at length on the notion of communication, and it is through his sage reflections that I can undertake a sort of "healing" process. Since our ability to perceive our environment is necessarily imperfect, what can be done to bring our conception of it closer to "actual" reality? It's simple: all we need do is speak with others on these subjects towards which we consider ourselves the most biased. Metaphorically speaking, it means that we should bridge our realities together so as to converge upon a commonly agreed idea, which can potentially be a mutually beneficial undertaking. With this in mind, the solution is clear: I sought out some of my most (and least) avid readers so as to get their thoughts on Disorder Reviews, in hopes that their perspective may help temper mine. Here are some of the statements that I have received:
- "I can't believe I read the whole thing!"
- "I will skin Martin for his revisionism."
- "I saw a Disorder Reviews reader the other day. Horrible creatures!"
- "Who the hell still writes User Reviews?"
- "Disorder review, although flawed due to its main contributor being a pork consummating kafir, has many nuances and intricacies when it comes to the analysis of media and what surrounds it in an atypical third-person gonzo-esque approach whilst
still maintingsurpassing the level of accuracy of traditional journalism. The inclusion of interviews and essays is also an extremely appreciated complement to the main course which is typically the reviews Disorder is known for. I heard a man of faith acquired he rights for Disorder, and by God this is a blessed day." - "it's shit"
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PERSONAL RATING: *****
RECOMMENDATION RATING: ***
LETTERED RATING: DELTA
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PERSONAL RATING: *****
RECOMMENDATION RATING: ***
LETTERED RATING: DELTA
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