Dwarves and you.

[psychodynamica]

I remember when i was 9 (9 years ago) and my mum described a man we were to meet as a 'Dwarf'. Now i have nothing agaisnt people who are really short, but i was deeply dissapointed. i expected plaited beard, shaggy hear, a tankard and a vaguely scottish accent. This taught me to distrust words.

Also, anyone who short enough to be a Dwarf, please dress like a Lord of the rings dwarf, if you do i will buy you a drink and dress like a whoopie cushion while i do it.

 

[Lang901]

I remember when i was 9 (9 years ago) and my mum described a man we were to meet as a 'Dwarf'. Now i have nothing agaisnt people who are really short, but i was deeply dissapointed. i expected plaited beard, shaggy hear, a tankard and a vaguely scottish accent. This taught me to distrust words.

Also, anyone who short enough to be a Dwarf, please dress like a Lord of the rings dwarf, if you do i will buy you a drink and dress like a whoopie cushion while i do it.

I think most Little people would find that offensive, so that's going to be difficult to find. Heck, at the national convention, I never saw anyone who even came close to your description

 

[SckizoBoy]

Huh... funny story, I was meeting up with a few friends (and consequently a whole load of friends of friends) for paintballing session. In walks a flaming long red-bearded (hair was normal, you'll be disappointed to know) guy about five-foot-five ish (basically, short for a 24yo English guy, but still built like a small brick shithouse). We get introduced and spend about ten seconds sizing each other up. And completely without irony, I ask 'You wouldn't happen to have an axe, would you?' to which he replies, again completely without irony, 'Yes, I do, about half a dozen of them.' Spent the rest of the journey to the paintballing place talking about weaponry.

 

[wooty]

I dont have a problem with dwarves to be honest, half the time I dont even see them.......

 

[therandombear]

That is also how I pictured dwarfs when my mom told me a dwarf was walking towards us. I was like "Like Gimli? " and then a very short bald person walks past us and my mom says that was a dwarf :<

No offence of course against the little people, I was just a child then xD

Is "little people" the right term these days? >.>

 

[Blunderboy]

Huh... funny story, I was meeting up with a few friends (and consequently a whole load of friends of friends) for paintballing session. In walks a flaming long red-bearded (hair was normal, you'll be disappointed to know) guy about five-foot-five ish (basically, short for a 24yo English guy, but still built like a small brick shithouse). We get introduced and spend about ten seconds sizing each other up. And completely without irony, I ask 'You wouldn't happen to have an axe, would you?' to which he replies, again completely without irony, 'Yes, I do, about half a dozen of them.' Spent the rest of the journey to the paintballing place talking about weaponry.

Ha. Awesome. I love it when people are like that.

OT - Well OP you're either being unintentionally offensive, or you're doing it on purpose. I'm going to give you the benefit of the doubt and assume it's the first one.

 

[deus-ex-machina]

I don't know why, but when it comes to the 'vertically challenged' I have the opposite of a phobia. Rather than freak out, without knowing the person, in any way, all I can is try and stop myself from laughing. All I want to do is cry with laughter. I'm actually pretty conscious of it now, but I can't help myself.

I laugh like Cartman in that episode of South Park.

 

[Viral_Lola]

I'm a short cake but I don't think I would make a good dwarf. Hmm... I'd make a good Asian gnome the very at most.

 

[Hamish Durie]

I have one at my school
hes kinda the class clown who takes all and any short jokes with good humour(every1 sorta got over it)
any way he rocked up to schoool on muffti (where anyhitng you want day) day wearing

expected plaited beard, shaggy hear, a tankard and a vaguely scottish accent. This taught me to distrust words.

mock scottish accent and all and when school finished his parents picked him up and gave him (I shit you not) a broad axe (probably fake) and toke a pose

By this time the rest of the class was on the floor ROFLROFLROFLROFL as you can imagine
I pity in-sub who was sick that day

 

[Emissary Laito]

OT - Well OP you're either being unintentionally offensive, or you're doing it on purpose. I'm going to give you the benefit of the doubt and assume it's the first one.

I suspect he's high. His avatar leads me to think its a possibility at least.

Amusing though. Made me smile.