first date ideas

[sparten042]

i need something to do when i ask her out i dont know something fun, charming etc.. but i just want it to seem special and something she'll remeber. and i really dont care how outrageous something happened today that made me realise that i should go for it whatever i do.. , and any ideas for a first date

 

[ZtH]

Hey, since no one else has picked this up here's a few recommendations. Obviously it will depend at least partially on age and tastes so be sure you're not just following suggestions to the letter.

First, your first date should include conversation, as such I do not recommend movies or other activities where discussion is discouraged or difficult. Second while you need conversation, you may not know each other well enough to get away with just conversation, so I would recommend a light activity that allows you to converse without putting to much pressure on the conversation.

As for asking her out I won't be much help since I'm not very good at these things myself. I recommend being direct though. It does you no good if she doesn't understand exactly what you're looking for.

 

[Zantos]

There are several things that make a good first date location.
- It should be informal and in a relaxed atmosphere.
- You should be able to talk, either have your own conversation or there should be something in the place which you can springboard a conversation off.
- It should be public, so that you both feel safe, but also somewhere with a little privacy to it.
- It needs to be somewhere where you can show off little nooks and crannies of yourself that work in your favour but you maybe don't get to flaunt them too often.
- It should ideally be a setting by which if the date goes either better or worse than expected then it gives you the option to carry on the night, with the date if it goes really well or some mates if it goes badly.

Essentially you should go to the pub. Yep, good old pub solves another of life's problems.

 

[CommanderKirov]

Bah. With my current girlfriend the first date we went on was the Iron Maiden concert.

Conversations? Bah!
Relaxed atmosphere? Poppycock!
Privacy? Pff!

Metal? Fuck yeah!



I guess my point was, if you meet an amazing girl sometimes the craziest ideas turn out to be the best ones.

 

[Simalacrum]

It really depends on the kind of person you and her are.

Do you know her at all? If not, just getting to know each other would be a priority, so just having a coffee or something may suffice.
If you two are already accquainted with one another, then try out something both of you enjoy. BOTH is the important bit - if you can't enjoy yourself then it's hard for your company to enjoy themselves too!

Lastly, I don't think anything outlandish wouldbe advisable - nice and simple is what I would advise, rather than going big from the get go.

Good luck!

 

[Shio]

You're approaching this from the worst possible angle.

First date is not about having fun, it's about playing it safe and presenting yourself as the right kind of person. The last thing you want to do is to look like a desperate try-hard. If the girl agreed to go out with you she'll probably be perfectly fine with a having a conversation along with some good food and drinks.

It is important that a girl feels comfortable during the first date. This includes:
Not having to step out of the comfort zone (obviously).
Being able to go home at any moment.
No need to rely on her date too much in any way.

That's why taking her skydiving is a piss poor idea, despite of everything that MTV told you.

I have to disagree on a few points.

Firstly: presenting yourself as anything other than 100% you is a fas-track to failure. If you act up or otherwise alter your personality to appease someone, however slight it may be, they grow interested in the act and can completely lose interest when the 'real you' reveal itself later down the dating line. Dressing up or feigning interest in a hobby are both examples of this. If they don't like plain old you, hiding yourself won't make it any better. It might enable it to last longer, but that's wasted tine in my eyes.

Secondly: having fun is the most important element of a date. If I have fun with someone I am more likely to want to hang out with them again, be it as friends or more. Fun is fun!

I have to agree with your other points, though; making a huge deal of a date (especially a first) can go really bad, really fast.

 

[LetalisK]

I always went with the coffee/ice cream/etc route. Usually the women I went on a first date with I didn't know very much if at all, so conversation was a must. Coffee/ice cream/etc also allowed me to transition into something else(like dinner, walk in the park and feeding ducks, etc) very easily if the date was going well and that also added some spontaneity to the situation.

Firstly: presenting yourself as anything other than 100% you is a fas-track to failure. If you act up or otherwise alter your personality to appease someone, however slight it may be, they grow interested in the act and can completely lose interest when the 'real you' reveal itself later down the dating line. Dressing up or feigning interest in a hobby are both examples of this. If they don't like plain old you, hiding yourself won't make it any better. It might enable it to last longer, but that's wasted tine in my eyes.

Well, I'm a man who faked two relationships for the sake of sex (they were both really good-looking, but I didn't even like them, lol) so I might not be the right person to give dating advice in the first place

I've actually been curious about something, so I'll ask you. Would you rather have a mediocre relationship for awesome sex or mediocre sex for an awesome relationship?

 

[370999]

Ask her what she wants to do. She knows herself far better then anyone on this forum does. Generally I would reccomend having a meal together but people may want to do different things and have different interests. My stock one is asking someone out for coffee but whatever she wants to do (and you) is the important thing.

 

[artanis_neravar]

You're approaching this from the worst possible angle.

First date is not about having fun, it's about playing it safe and presenting yourself as the right kind of person. The last thing you want to do is to look like a desperate try-hard. If the girl agreed to go out with you she'll probably be perfectly fine with a having a conversation along with some good food and drinks.

It is important that a girl feels comfortable during the first date. This includes:
Not having to step out of the comfort zone (obviously).
Being able to go home at any moment.
No need to rely on her date too much in any way.

That's why taking her skydiving is a piss poor idea, despite of everything that MTV told you.

There are several things that make a good first date location.
- It should be informal and in a relaxed atmosphere.
- You should be able to talk, either have your own conversation or there should be something in the place which you can springboard a conversation off.
- It should be public, so that you both feel safe, but also somewhere with a little privacy to it.
- It needs to be somewhere where you can show off little nooks and crannies of yourself that work in your favour but you maybe don't get to flaunt them too often.
- It should ideally be a setting by which if the date goes either better or worse than expected then it gives you the option to carry on the night, with the date if it goes really well or some mates if it goes badly.

Essentially you should go to the pub. Yep, good old pub solves another of life's problems.

So what I'm getting here is that trying to get a girl to break the law on the first date is not a good idea?

 

[artanis_neravar]

I always went with the coffee/ice cream/etc route. Usually the women I went on a first date with I didn't know very much if at all, so conversation was a must. Coffee/ice cream/etc also allowed me to transition into something else(like dinner, walk in the park and feeding ducks, etc) very easily if the date was going well and that also added some spontaneity to the situation.

Firstly: presenting yourself as anything other than 100% you is a fas-track to failure. If you act up or otherwise alter your personality to appease someone, however slight it may be, they grow interested in the act and can completely lose interest when the 'real you' reveal itself later down the dating line. Dressing up or feigning interest in a hobby are both examples of this. If they don't like plain old you, hiding yourself won't make it any better. It might enable it to last longer, but that's wasted tine in my eyes.

Well, I'm a man who faked two relationships for the sake of sex (they were both really good-looking, but I didn't even like them, lol) so I might not be the right person to give dating advice in the first place

I've actually been curious about something, so I'll ask you. Would you rather have a mediocre relationship for awesome sex or mediocre sex for an awesome relationship?

mediocre sex for awesome relationship, cause the relationship is the important part, and sex can always be improved apon