For 5 minutes, you have the entire world's attention

[tthor]

EDIT: screw it, you can have 5 minutes now, so you can actually say something

Lets say for exactly 2 minutes, you have the entire world's undivided attention; every television is tuned in to you, (being translated into every language) with every person in the world glued to the screen. For that 2 minutes, you can do or say whatever you want infront of an audience of 7 billion people.

So, what do you say to the world?

 

[Jedoro]

inb4 Rick Rolling everyone

...actually, screw it, that's what I'd do.

 

[loc978]

Upon careful consideration, I'd have nothing to say. General statements tend to be useless waffling, and any two five minute statement that would actually apply to seven billion people would need to be incredibly general.

So I guess I'd give em two five minutes of silent

...they know what they did. Let 'em be uncomfortable.

**edit** Seriously, to say anything substantial I'd need a few hours for the speech, and a few weeks to prepare it. Even then, I would most likely affect fewer than a tenth of one percent of people's minds.

 

[SirDeadly]

I'd moon everyone!

Seriously I have no idea. I'd probably just Rick Roll the world as the guy above me said.

EDIT: Maybe I'll try to squeeze this into 2 minutes.

 

[Odinsson]

I'd move my fleet of interstellar warships into position and give a two-minute villainous speech about the futility of resistance.
Also, I'll be a Space Viking

 

[Hagi]

Can't really think of anything more epic and deafening then 2 minutes of complete and utter silence.

Can you imagine that? Every single human being on this planet all being completely silent for 2 minutes?

 

[Sizzle Montyjing]

Tell them that i am the illuminati.
That'd fuck with them a bit.
Also i'd lsiten to smooth jazz, with cheese, crackers and wine all the while wearing a tuxedo and a fez.

 

[jamie56]

terribly cliche but I would try to convince everyone to work together reminding everyone we are all humans

 

[tthor]

I'd moon everyone!

Seriously I have no idea. I'd probably just Rick Roll the world as the guy above me said.

EDIT: Maybe I'll try to squeeze this into 2 minutes.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5IvPIWzQcUY
(cannot remember how to post videos...)

, no spaces

 

[repeating integers]

I'd make sure to inform them that they'd all just lost The Game.

 

[pearcinator]

take off mah clothes...

line up ladies!

 

[Scarim Coral]

Why hide of course! I don't want that much attention or people make me into a meme base on my 2-5 minutes of screen time.
Also before you ask about using the time to make a speach or something, I don't believe whatever I say will be significant enough for the entire audiences to take an impact from my speach.

 

[Blue Hero]

Stream this for the entire world.

 

[SirDeadly]

I'd moon everyone!

Seriously I have no idea. I'd probably just Rick Roll the world as the guy above me said.

EDIT: Maybe I'll try to squeeze this into 2 minutes.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5IvPIWzQcUY
(cannot remember how to post videos...)

, no spaces

Thank you! I should probably try to remember that...

 

[Sewer Rat]

I'd try to lead them all in this dance, to this music.

 

[Maximum_Power_Cheese_Supreme]

I'd sit there and do that thing where you move a finger up and down in front of your mouth to make that funny bibobubobibobubo noise.

terribly cliche but I would try to convince everyone to work together reminding everyone we are all humans

That would never work. No offense, it's just that two minutes of unrehearsed on-the-spot chit-chat cannot undo millenniums worth of various political and social problems. Though, it's always worth a shot. You'd need to have a speech of this caliber ready if you want to at least affect a small handful of the people:

Maybe I'll try to squeeze this into 2 minutes.

 

[Edd4224]

Dudes, stop being such dicks to each other! As well as other things designed to get them to work together. I might also point out that we may need to rethink the economic situation, because if we all have our jobs taken by labour-saving devices there will ultimately be less money to spend so less things will be bought etc etc.

 

[jamie56]

your probably right maximum