Funny/bad pickup lines.

[vento 231]

Me and my friend have a dare going. The loser has to give the worst pickup line the other can think of to a very, very, hot girl at our high school(which he has a crush on, but doesn't have the balls to ask out). What do you guys think I should have him say when I win.

I was thinking: Do you work for UPS? I could have sworn I saw you checking out my package, or I'm gay, think you can convert me?
What do you think?
Hopefully she'll slap him and not ever talk to him again.

 

[Pimppeter2]

"If I call your left leg Thanksgiving, and your right leg Christmas; can I visit you between the holidays?"

 

[FallenJellyDoughnut]

How bout "Show us ya' pink bits!"?

 

[mcgroobber]

the word of the day is legs, lets go to my house and spread the word

 

[Baron Von Evil Satan]

Nice shoes. Wanna fuck?

Additions: Hey babe, wanna make an easy fifty bucks?
I am conducting a field test of how many woman have pierced nipples.
Are you menstruating? If so, I know how to insert tampons.
If my pillow had a hole in it, I would name it after you.
There is something wrong with my cell phone. It doesn't have your number in it.

 

[mcgroobber]

there are some others but i dont exactly feel comfortable saying them

just google

 

[Baron Von Evil Satan]

Edit: I think the time space continuem broke on me...

 

[aPod]

"Woooooo Wooooo Weeeoooo Weeeooooo... thats the ambulance coming to take me away because you just stopped my heart. Wooo... Woooo"

He has to scream the siren noises so it works doubly great as a lame ass pick up line and it draws the attention of everyone around to see him make a fool and get shot down.

trust me, shaming your friends is great... but shaming them in front of a ton of people is better.

 

[mcgroobber]

Nice shoes. Wanna fuck?

that made me laugh

 

[Ken_J]

Hey baby, just to let you know, not a Banana.

 

[scorch 13]

"Did you fart cause you blew me away"

 

[RatRace123]

That's a great dress, 'bet it would look great on my floor.
Is Heaven missing an angel? 'cause I want to plow you.

 

[IHateDaManSkirt]

My friend once mimicked this comic strip [http://www.xkcd.com/513] and he got to first base. It was impressive.

 

[(whitty name here)]

Call someone over to you with your finger and say,"I just make you come with one finger, think of what i can do with my whole hand."

This ones good too,"Excuse me, but do you give head to strangers? No. Well, then, allow me to introduce myself."

But one of the most humorous(to you I find when you first hear it) is,"Which is easier? You getting into those tight pants or getting you out of them?"

Ah the shit me and my friends pull for teh lulz.....

 

[Sleekgiant]

Are you from heaven? 'Cause I have an erection

- Robot Chicken.

AND YOU MUST BELIEVE IN IT

And we have a winner. That was absolutely great.

 

[Warrior Irme]

My friend once mimicked this comic strip( He got to first base.): http://xkcd.com/513

Oh how true this can be for some people I know/myself. "Hey baby I want to be your derivative so I can lie tangent to all of your curves."

 

[nick n stuff]

i genuinely have a friend that swears by asking for ice at the bar, slamming it against a table where his 'target' is seated and then saying, 'now the ice is broken, let's talk'. he told me to do it and when i refused he did it himself to prove that he was serious. needless to say he went home alone.

 

[chozo_hybrid]

Is that a mirror in your pants? Because I see myself in them.

 

[gbemery]

Nice shoes. Wanna fuck?

what, that line is a classic. You compliment her and get right to the point.

OP: I like these ones for the worst
'You have nice child-bearing hips' or 'How long did it take to shave those looong legs?'