I'm the creepy ex-boyfriend

[zelda2fanboy]

So there's this girl...

We had an internet relationship for a few months and eventually met in person, but now it's over. She's unfriended me on facebook, doesn't go on skype, and doesn't seem to be anywhere on the internet anymore. I loved (and still love) her. I miss her like crazy. I wonder how she's doing, if she has a new boyfriend, or if she's happy. I want to know she's okay. I sometimes google her name a lot to make sure she didn't randomly die or anything because that sort of thing would pop up on the internet. Her facebook page is bookmarked in my browser and I can still see some of her profile and pictures because of her lax privacy settings and because I'm still friends with one of her friends. The little box in the corner says "friend request sent" from back when she unfriended me and I thought it was a glitch or something.

Is there anything I can do? I want to message her and I want to message her friend to ask about her. I'm worried I'll get fully blocked and I'll lose the last little thread of contact entirely.

I dreamed about her last night. I still have her number in my phone, but I'm not nuts enough yet to call it. It's probably a good thing I don't drink alcohol.

 

[EternalFacepalm]

Don't contact her. I'm sorry to say this, but it's pretty obvious that she doesn't want to talk to you anymore.

 

[endnuen]

1.
Why do you post basically the same thread twice in a couple of days? In different sections of the forum?

2.
GFTOG.
Probably the most powerful tool for getting over a girl.
It works perfectly.

Just Go Fuck Ten Other Girls and you will be over her before you are probably half way there. Just trying lets you meet a lot of girls, and every single one of them makes your feelings for that other one dim.

 

[zelda2fanboy]

Hey, it's been a solid 16 days since I posted a similar thread... Fuck it, never mind. Sorry.

 

[SaikyoKid]

Umm, yea. Might be best to just accept it and do your damndest to move on. It sounds like she really isn't interested anymore, but its kinda hard to say without the details. Just seriously, delete her pages from your bookmarks, don't go lurking around trying to find her, and just accept that she may or may not be doing okay. Hanging around like that after a breakup probably isn't healthy...

 

[zelda2fanboy]

Hey, it's been a solid 16 days since I posted a similar thread... Fuck it, never mind. Sorry.

So did she like you until you met? Or was it you drifted apart well after you met?

Probably the former with a little of the latter. We almost immediately had sex upon meeting. Then we went out to eat. Then we had sex the next morning. Then we hung out with her friend all day, then we went back to the hotel room and had more sex. She asked me to write her as soon as I got home, which I did. But then after that, less and less and less, until she facebook deleted me. That was right before she went on her regular trip out of state where she was planning to have sex with this friend of a friend she liked. I knew I wasn't really her boyfriend anymore and I knew she really wanted to do it, so I didn't have too much of a problem. Whatever made her happy. I wanted to stay friends. I talked to her a couple of times after that, then nothing.

Maybe the fact that I still had feelings for her made her cut me off. I dunno. I think I offered to never message her again if I could still be facebook friends. She told me she felt used because it was my first time with a girl. I wish I could tell her how much I still cared. And if not, at least know she's alright.

Again, I make these threads too damn often. One thread is too many. Sorry.

 

[Jonluw]

Sounds like she didn't give you proper closure.
Dickish thing to do.

You need to put it behind you, man. Not much else you can do.

It's either that or track her down and force her to explain herself so you can have closure.

 

[Phasmal]

Leave her alone.

She ended your relationship for one reason or another but she's made it clear she doesn't want continued contact. Respect her decision and stop looking at her pages and stuff like that.
In the end you are only hurting yourself.

 

[Esotera]

It's only creepy if you start dating her sister and saying how similar they are.

Being serious, you should leave her alone, as it doesn't look like she wants to talk to you, and this will help you move on. Maybe try meeting some new people who might be interested in a relationship.

 

[=y]

The more you think about it, the closer to doing something you'll ultimately regret you'll be. Let it go man. Its hard, it sucks, I've been there. The thing is there are millions of girls out there who can make you happy and want you to make them happy. You just have to look or, if you're lucky, maybe they will come your into your life unexpectedly. You just have to be ready for it.

Dwelling on this relationship which is, face it, never going to happen again is doing you no good. I'm not going to say go sleep with ten other girls to forget her or something like that. It's something you have to move on from on your own. In the meantime pick up a controller or keyboard and play some video games. Have fun!

 

[CODE-D]

Sounds like she didn't give you proper closure.
Dickish thing to do.

You need to put it behind you, man. Not much else you can do.

It's either that or track her down and force her to explain herself so you can have closure.

If he acts that way why exactly would she feel like giving him any more closure? I'd assume she'd want to just flee. You seem to assume she has no reason at all for it.

what is your avatar from?

 

[Jonluw]

Sounds like she didn't give you proper closure.
Dickish thing to do.

You need to put it behind you, man. Not much else you can do.

It's either that or track her down and force her to explain herself so you can have closure.

If he acts that way why exactly would she feel like giving him any more closure? I'd assume she'd want to just flee. You seem to assume she has no reason at all for it.

What do you mean by "that way"?
Are you referring to the way OP describes himself as acting, or the suggestion in my post?
If it's the latter, I should perhaps specify that it was a joke.

If the former: It doesn't seem to me that the OP did anything to warrant her leaving him without closure.
Sure, he acts creepy now, but this is after the fact.
Still, we aren't getting the whole story.

 

[theparsonski]

It sounds like she used you anyway. Your relationship was described as "Sex, sex, food, more sex, letters, then she got bored and went and fucked someone else."

Sounds like she didn't have any feelings for you in the first place. Get over her, she's not worth the trouble.

Why not get out there and look for somebody who isn't going to shag you within a few hours of meeting and then pass you off? They can't be that hard to find!

 

[Liberaliter]

You need to accept that she doesn't want you any more. This may be hard to take, but it will most likely happen to you many more times in your life, just accept it.

 

[Scarim Coral]

Well at least you're not stalking her.

Don't know what to say really other than accept that it's over and move on. Granted I don't mean date someone already but do let yourself heal over it.

 

[zelda2fanboy]

Why not get out there and look for somebody who isn't going to shag you within a few hours of meeting and then pass you off? They can't be that hard to find!

You'd be surprised. Closest person to a girlfriend I've had in my 25 years of life. And I've never gotten the opportunity to sleep with anyone else.

Well at least you're not stalking her.

If she lived closer, I probably would be. :/

The way he acts, not your suggestion. Sorry now I realize that wasn't very clear. He's seemed a bit obsessive for a while now, but I guess he might have appeared less so before.

You're right. I wish I wasn't like this and I don't know how to shake it. There isn't enough distraction in the world and every spare moment is spent thinking about her. If there were other people in my life, it probably wouldn't seem like such a big deal, but there aren't, so it does.

 

[Phasmal]

Why not get out there and look for somebody who isn't going to shag you within a few hours of meeting and then pass you off? They can't be that hard to find!

You'd be surprised. Closest person to a girlfriend I've had in my 25 years of life. And I've never gotten the opportunity to sleep with anyone else.

Well at least you're not stalking her.

If she lived closer, I probably would be. :/

The way he acts, not your suggestion. Sorry now I realize that wasn't very clear. He's seemed a bit obsessive for a while now, but I guess he might have appeared less so before.

You're right. I wish I wasn't like this and I don't know how to shake it. There isn't enough distraction in the world and every spare moment is spent thinking about her. If there were other people in my life, it probably wouldn't seem like such a big deal, but there aren't, so it does.

Eh. I don't wish to be mean but you are sending some major red flags up.
I would do yourself a favour and take up a hobby or something. If you find yourself thinking about her, immeadiately do something else to take your mind off it. Do not continue this.
Not only will you just hurt yourself, I am willing to bet you will be shooting yourself in the foot over any chance at a new relationship.