Internet is Shocked to Learn That Sugary Drink Has Lots of Sugar...

[DeliveryGodNoah_v1legacy]

Have you guys seen this? I'm sure you have. It's everywhere for no good reason.

The Starbucks Unicorn Frappe. Some people are losing their minds over it. Some say it's horrible, but many say it tastes amazing. I don't know, I haven't tried it. And honestly, I have nothing against Starbucks, only because I see it for what it is: A Dessert Coffee Shop

They don't really serve coffee. They serve watery milkshakes disguised as coffee. Unless you order something without the crap in it...then it's just bad coffee.

But ostensibly everyone is shocked to learn that this colorful mess of a drink is loaded with sugar. And this is making news all over the internet.

The key issue with people seems to be that it contains 76 grams of sugar...okay? You're surprised? It's a dessert drink. Most milkshakes have the exact same amount of crap in them. If you've ever drank more than one soda you've likely gotten close to that.

Do people really think it wouldn't have a bunch of bad stuff? Were they hoping to make this their daily drink of choice?

 

[Parasondox]

Not a surprise really. People on the net love to lie to themselves to feel better about things that harm them.

 

[Prime_Hunter_H01]

They don't really serve coffee. They serve watery milkshakes disguised as coffee. Unless you order something without the crap in it...then it's just bad coffee.

THAAAAAANNK YOOOOOUUUUUUUU!!!!!!

I have a bit more animosity against Starbucks because it is the go too coffee place for most people, and the first in the discussion of coffee for most people. Yeah it is pretty stupid if people did not realize that that milkshake was full of sugar.

I do not go full "fight against the man, man" but I will believe that it is responsible for the death of other coffee places. Hell even among desert style coffee it is at best mediocre, but its just SO DAMN PREVALENT. I am glad that places like Dutch Bro's are making a nice footprint here in Arizona, as well as a few independent places and small chains, and I mean reasonable coffee places not weird hipster coffee places.

I say this because a barber space I went to was owned by this guy who had a fancy coffee bar he ran in the lobby. Whisky glass sized drinks were sold at the cheapest $7 and it was some weird shit like, mint and coffee inside a cup that pure tobacco was burned in. I tried it because it was not my money that was paying for it so I decided, why not. Still could not believe that I drank a 7 dollar drink whos deal was mint and smoke were added to it.

 

[Silentpony_v1legacy]

Eh? Who cares about Starbucks?! What, is this 2008 in an upper-class university library the week before exams and we're all trying to seem cool in front of the grey sweatpants clothed peroxide blondes?!

 

[DudeistBelieve]

I mean people that spend that much on coffee probably ain't that bright anyway.

 

[Michel Henzel]

The thing looks more like a extremely large cup of Ice Cream. It practically screams that it's filled with lots of sugar.

 

[DeliveryGodNoah_v1legacy]

The thing looks more like a extremely large cup of Ice Cream. It practically screams that it's filled with lots of sugar.

That's literally what it is. There's no caffeine, no coffee, it's all made of ice cream, syrup, and cream. And yet there are hundreds (likely more) of people on Twitter (I know, I shouldn't expect much else from there) absolutely dumbfounded that there's so much stuff in it.

 

[Bob_McMillan]

Some context, drinking one of these is equivalent to drinking 3/4 of a 1L Coke on your own. Which sounds fucking gross. Thats like 15 teaspoons of sugar... ew.

A picture to show off how terrifying this thing looks:

http://starbuckssecretmenu.net/wp-content/uploads/2017/04/Unicorn-Frappuccino-Samples.jpg

I think even Starbucks knows how disgusting this thing is, considering they are marketing it as something to be Instagrammed first and drank/thrown out later.

 

[Randomosity]

So you're telling me a bright, Technicolor milkshake with the word 'Unicorn' in its name has a lot of sugar in it?

 

[Drathnoxis]

Some context, drinking one of these is equivalent to drinking 3/4 of a 1L Coke on your own. Which sounds fucking gross. Thats like 15 teaspoons of sugar... ew.

A picture to show off how terrifying this thing looks:

*img snip*

I think even Starbucks knows how disgusting this thing is, considering they are marketing it as something to be Instagrammed first and drank/thrown out later.

That looks pretty tasty! Dunno why, but pink and blue are one heck of an appetizing colour combination.

 

[Imre Csete]

I was too busy to laugh at the Juicero stuff to notice this.

Wait a minute...

...are those Christmas colours?

Starbucks started its annual war on Christmas on Easter?!

 

[Johnny Novgorod]

Oh yeah, I saw Colbert drink one of those.


Fuck Starbucks.

 

[Wintermute_v1legacy]

My diet isn't the best, but jesus christ. I'll eat fast food no problem, but the food at least has to look like food or something close to food. These colorful sweets/shakes whatever... I'll pass.

That Minotaur Macchiato looks great though.

 

[sanquin]

I never understood the whole starbucks hype. It doesn't serve coffee, it serves overpriced sugar drinks with some coffee in it. If I want actual coffee, I just go to my mom's. She has one of those machines that freshly grinds the beans and has one of those things that makes milk foamy for you. Plus a setting for how strong you want your coffee to be of course. And that's all you need to make a damn cup of coffee; Coffee beans, hot water, and possibly milk and sugar.

 

[Veldel]

iv only got something from Starbucks once

I got this free thing on my birthday and I got a 20 doller coffee for free.


Was great and had so much caffeine im amazed i didn't OD


Wasn't good enough that id pay money for there coffee tho unless prices where lowered

 

[Queen Michael]

With all due respect, I'm gonna need a source. This seems like the kind of thing that nobody's actually upset or shocked about, but everybody thinks somebody else is upset or shocked about.

 

[DeliveryGodNoah_v1legacy]

With all due respect, I'm gonna need a source. This seems like the kind of thing that nobody's actually upset or shocked about, but everybody thinks somebody else is upset or shocked about.

Yahoo [https://www.yahoo.com/beauty/heres-whats-actually-starbucks-unicorn-frappuccino-152727061.html]
Buzzfeed has an article, but I refuse to give them more views with a direct link.

But christ, I'm not putting tons of Twitter links here. That's where the bulk of it comes from.

I'm fine with people informing others, but I've seen genuine outrage.

And as time has passed, there's been a larger rise in people agreeing that it shouldn't be a surprise. I'm just dumbfounded that there was surprise at all, regardless of the amount of people.

 

[Canadamus Prime]

A picture to show off how terrifying this thing looks:

http://starbuckssecretmenu.net/wp-content/uploads/2017/04/Unicorn-Frappuccino-Samples.jpg

I think even Starbucks knows how disgusting this thing is, considering they are marketing it as something to be Instagrammed first and drank/thrown out later.

People are shocked that that thing is loaded with sugar? Really? I can just look at it and tell you that. People are dumb.

 

[Quellist]

I thought the one people were losing their shit over was the Hot mulled fruit with Chai (105 grams of sugar). Mainly because the word Chai made it sound like some hipster herbal tea

Either way, yuck!

 

[MHR]

I'm just going to echo almost the same as what everyone else is saying. Of course this is bad for you, and nobody should be surprised. And there's no way you're going to taste the single splash of bargain coffee they put in this diabetes serum.

This is why america is fucked -- that people could be so surprised at the obvious: This sugary-looking drink has tons of sugar in it. If you don't vaccinate, diseases we haven't seen for decades come back. Illegality for petty drugs causes systemic societal problems. Donald Trump is a compulsively lying narcissist that will stoop to any and every low if it will cover for his insecurities. Fucking pick one.