Is punishing a kid consider abuse?

[MasochisticAvenger]

So, I've been following another thread wherein the original poster argued that Tommy Jordan, the man who shot up his daughter's laptop, is abusing his daughter. Disturbingly, I found that some people had the opinion punishing a child for doing something wrong is considered a form of abuse. Some even going as far as suggesting punishing a child for doing something wrong should be considered on the same level as beating a wife.

So, Escapist, do you think punishing a child is, or should be, considered abuse?

 

[Vegosiux]

You know, I had this quirky idea of letting kids to what they want, where they want, when they want, but also leave it to them to get themselves out of any mess they get into. And if I advocated that publicly, I'd get crucified, you know, think of the children!!!

But if I advocate a more strict parenthood, I'll also get crucified? Golly me, glad I never intend to have kids.

No. Punishing your kid if they did something to deserve it is not abuse. But it should also not be dealt without consideration, we have a saying here, punishment must be educational, a kid who gets punished should be able to learn a thing or two from the experience.

Beating is abuse, of course. But bonking a kid on the head with a rolled-up newspaper isn't beating.

 

[Dave In A Cape]

No it's not abuse to give them a smacked bottom once in a while if you have exhausted all other alternatives.

But there is obviously a fine line between slapping their bum as a form of discipline and out right abuse.
The way I see it, it should be used as a last resort for the unruly.

 

[MrTub]

What do you mean with punishing a kid?

Is that included/exclude hitting a child? cause I would see that as abuse.

 

[Scarim Coral]

No? Well it depend the "punishment". We all know that hitting the child (spanking is up to you) and shouting at the child in a demoral way is abuse.
Any other punishment shouldn't be consider as an abuse as it suppose to teach the child his/ her action for the cause of punishment is wrong. You know teaching a child right and wrong so he or she doesnt grow up to be a law breaker or a criminal.

Also FYI last time I read somewhere in that thread about that dad destorying his daughter laptop, they sort out their difference and came to a truce so yay?

 

[Jonluw]

Dealing in absolutes, the thread?
How about "punishing a child excessively is abuse".

If you harm your child for whatever reason (Well, unless it's a spontaneous strike), it's abuse. It is not, however, abuse to give your child a reasonable grounding when they've done something stupid.
I personally don't believe that kind of parenting accomplishes anything though, so I don't approve of it in any case.
Grounding can of course also be called abuse if it is done excessively. You know, such as grounding your daughter for two years for venting and generally acting a like a stereotypical bratty teenager.

 

[Swyftstar]

Depends on who you ask and what the punishment is. I have at times seen a child hit where I felt bad and thought that they didn't deserve it and at other times I sat aghast while a child ran roughshod and wondered why the parent didn't put a foot up their ass. I would leave it up to the parents unless the health of the child is put in some obvious danger and tell anybody else to mind their damn business.

 

[Liberaliter]

I don't consider it abuse, but I don't think physical abuse is necessary all the time. A parent should be able to verbally approach the child, or indirectly punish them through restrictions. A firm hand may be necessary in some circumstances however.

 

[GrandmaFunk]

A good way to avoid falling into abusive patterns is to never discipline your kids when you are angry.

discipline should never be emotional.

 

[Twilight_guy]

No. Then again I'm in favor of corporal punishment so I'm kind of an asshole on the issue. People and animals have many things in common and I think behavior training is closer then we'd like to think most of the time. When you are training a child to be socially acceptable you need to be able to enforce positive feedback to reward correct behavior and negative feedback to punish bad behavior. Its a simple pattern of making stop one behavior and adopt another. If you have no negative feedback then you aren't able to discourage a behavior making it hard to tell them it is wrong. Therefore, you must punish a child to show them a behavior is wrong. The degree that you need to punish a child varies on the situation obviously, (there is legitimate child abuse after-all) but giving it up entirely is not a good idea.

 

[Nigh Invulnerable]

So, I've been following another thread wherein the original poster argued that Tommy Jordan, the man who shot up his daughter's laptop, is abusing his daughter. Disturbingly, I found that some people had the opinion punishing a child for doing something wrong is considered a form of abuse. Some even going as far as suggesting punishing a child for doing something wrong should be considered on the same level as beating a wife.

So, Escapist, do you think punishing a child is, or should be, considered abuse?

Damn, so you think it's okay to beat a kid black and blue if they accidentally let the dog out or something =O

I mean that's punishing a child and that's okay according to you, right?


But hey, maybe we should put silly misrepresentation aside. I won't say things like that, and you can be honest and admit that people aren't being against punishing kids, they're against certain punishments and out of proportion punishments.

Don't be thick. The OP's idea of punishment clearly does not involve beating someone senseless, as that would be obviously abuse. Grounding, taking away privileges, etc. constitute punishment that is perfectly acceptable.

 

[Instant K4rma]

I've never understood spanking. "Hey, Timmy was misbehaving today. Let's beat the kid into submission." It's been proven to have no positive effect, yet people still do it. That never makes any sense to me.


As for the dad putting a few rounds into his daughters laptop? It may have been a tad dramatic, but she deserved it, in my opinion. I feel punishment by negative reinforcement (taking away privileges, grounding, etc) isn't abuse, it's sensible parenting.

All my opinion, of course. I'm no parent, so this is easy for me to say.

 

[Hero in a half shell]

So, I've been following another thread wherein the original poster argued that Tommy Jordan, the man who shot up his daughter's laptop, is abusing his daughter. Disturbingly, I found that some people had the opinion punishing a child for doing something wrong is considered a form of abuse. Some even going as far as suggesting punishing a child for doing something wrong should be considered on the same level as beating a wife.

So, Escapist, do you think punishing a child is, or should be, considered abuse?

Damn, so you think it's okay to beat a kid black and blue if they accidentally let the dog out or something =O

I mean that's punishing a child and that's okay according to you, right?


But hey, maybe we should put silly misrepresentation aside. I won't say things like that, and you can be honest and admit that people aren't being against punishing kids, they're against certain punishments and out of proportion punishments.

Don't be thick. The OP's idea of punishment clearly does not involve beating someone senseless, as that would be obviously abuse. Grounding, taking away privileges, etc. constitute punishment that is perfectly acceptable.

Congratulations, you almost identified the satire!

On topic, no I don't think that enforcing discipline by spanking a child or shouting at them constitutes child abuse, but it should only be done in circumstances where their disobedience was severe, or they are simply not responding to any other punishments.

 

[tendaji]

I've never understood spanking. "Hey, Timmy was misbehaving today. Let's beat the kid into submission." It's been proven to have no positive effect, yet people still do it. That never makes any sense to me.


As for the dad putting a few rounds into his daughters laptop? It may have been a tad dramatic, but she deserved it, in my opinion. I feel punishment by negative reinforcement (taking away privileges, grounding, etc) isn't abuse, it's sensible parenting.

All my opinion, of course. I'm no parent, so this is easy for me to say.

It sure taught me not to pull the crap I did as a child that got me in trouble.

 

[klaynexas3]

this brings up a topic my friend and i had brought up in "in school suspension." we were in there for skipping, and things became boring as we couldn't say anything, well, weren't supposed to at any rate. so for the sake of being funny, i leaned over and whispered to him "i miss the good old days when they would just beat us and send us on our way." and now that i think back on it, i actually, and still do, mean it. i wouldn't view it as some terrible thing, just punishment for my mistakes, and a lot less tedious one at that.

case in point, even if my parents were to do it to me, which they don't, i think a spanking or a smack on the wrist is not child abuse. and to that facebook parenting guy, it wasn't the brightest punishment, as you spent so much time and money on it, but it wasn't abuse. the girl had not payed for the laptop, so it wasn't even hers, and he can do what he damn well pleases with his laptop, so he took it outside and shot it. good for him. did it harm the girl physically? he never even touched her. will she be mentally scarred? about as much as any teenager losing a phone, but if that's child abuse, a parent taking something they pay for away from their child, then nearly any form of punishment is abuse. in which case, abuse all you want parents. might learn your kids a thing or two