losing my virginity and how i feel used

[gonzo20]

Hey guys im a male, 20 and i just lost my virginty to a girl i really fancied but theres a downside to it. We were both a bit drunk at the time and both quite horny so she dragged me off somewhere and well it happened, wont go into the details. Ive sent her a few texts and she didnt even reply and i even contemplated calling her but her best friend, who im also good mates with said "to be honest, i dont think she really wants to get into a relationship at the moment" so yeah thats it, and it sucks. Most people would probably be happy with this but im not, because i wanted a bit more than just a simple fuck. Any comments will be appreciated.

 

[Nikolaz72]

Apart from an internet clap on the shoulder and the fact that you are still young. I dont think there is much discussion value in this <_<. . Ofcourse people can create discussions.

 

[Broady Brio]

I have a feeling I'd be in the same boat if it happened to me. I guess my reasoning being that I'd want the 1st time a bit meaningful as well.

As to fix this? You can't really reverse virginity. Unless you lose your memory about it.

 

[gonzo20]

I have a feeling I'd be in the same boat if it happened to me. I guess my reasoning being that I'd want the 1st time a bit meaningful as well.

As to fix this? You can't really reverse virginity. Unless you lose your memory about it.

haha ill just have to get hit on the head hard enough to get amnesia

 

[Hiname]

There is the first time that happens, and there is the first time you want it.
Physical virginity and mental virginity.

Which one is more important to you? Take your pick, take a drink and memorize the thing that happened as a good experiance on the details as what not to do on the first time you want really want too.

 

[TheDist]

Only advice I can give mate is to say, try not to put too much importance on virginity and the loss of it. If you are looking for a relationship i'd say your best bet is to keep looking, never easy I know, but if she isn't interested then thats all ya can do (and for the best in the long run trust me).

As for feeling used, I do understand man, just keep it all in perspective, could all be a hell of a lot worse. Trust me mate when ya find somone right for you virginity and such things become totaly irrelevant. So don't worry about it.

 

[Shirastro]

Contrary to the American teenage TV series wisdom, virginity isn't anything special.
It is a big deal, in a sense that it's you first time having sex and all, but rarely do people have an amazing first time sex. They are usually, to clumsy, shy and unprepared to actually enjoy it...or at least not as much as they will once they get more skillful.

Try to look at it from the bright side. She might have used you for sex (in which i see no problem btw ), but at least you got it out of the way. You are not a virgin anymore, and trust me, if you think one day you will look back and regret loosing it this way, you wont.

You'll figure out that sex is great and all, but it's not such a big deal as the aforementioned TV series make it out to be.

 

[Rancid0ffspring]

Honestly... as the years go by this will matter so little that one day you will wonder why you cared at all.

As for the lady... just play it cool. Don't chase after her otherwise you'll look needy. Which is really not good. Just be patient, wait till you cross paths again and just act as normal. Ask her how she's doing and try not to be weird about what has happened.

What ever you do DO NOT get shitty about this with her... you may end up losing face.

Remember, the best thing you can do is be cool about this.

Hope that helps dude

EDIT: congrats btw

 

[Kitteh]

im tempted to say damn you, but thats just my dry spell talking

 

[gonzo20]

well thanks for all the comments guys, i just thought it would be something better or lead to something greater but obviously im just not experienced at this relationship stuff. Hopefully ill find someone who will actually be worth my time

 

[Vonnis]

Be glad she just used you once. For some people this shit goes on for years. Of course if it goes on for that long it's probably their own fault, but I'm just saying. Just think of it as a chance card, "get out of virginity free, and reshuffle".

 

[Wuvlycuddles]

Maybe I'm just bitter about my first, but the way I see it, the bandage just got ripped off fast instead of pulled off slowly. Easy to confuse gratefulness with love? I dunno, but I've seen far too many cherry popping relationships crash and burn including my own, just take it for what it was, an experience and move on.

 

[staika]

Dammit, this never happens to me. I feel unwanted.

OT: This happened to one of my friends (Another lucky bastard) and nothing really came of it, the girl he slept with didn't want to have a relationship but they were still friends until high school ended and they parted ways to go to different colleges so they never kept in touch. In my opinion they would have ended up together given more time, but what he did is that he never really brought up the "Event" in fact I only heard about it once and never heard of it again. So I would say to play it cool and act like it didn't happen and only talk about it if she brings it up.

 

[JokerCrowe]

well thanks for all the comments guys, i just thought it would be something better or lead to something greater but obviously im just not experienced at this relationship stuff. Hopefully ill find someone who will actually be worth my time

I hope you do. I know things probably suck right now, but it won't kill you, and you'll probably become a better person because of it. Or at least a stronger person...
My advice is get some sleep (depending on the hour of course) and you'll probably feel a little better tomorrow. It isn't much but it's better.
Also, Congrats.

 

[crazeekamikazee]

you know it's strange, how when growing up sex seems so important but(at least for me) after a few relationships you kinda realize that sex is only a small part about a relationship. I use to blow the importance of it way out of proportion, if you feel like your missing something then I wouldn't worry, there're still better things than sex to come, "true" love feels great.

honestly I would take it for what it is and move on, it must of been fun and that's all there is to it, plus you had a practice ***** ^_^ jkjk lol.

 

[xPixelatedx]

As long as you didn't get an STD or cause a pregnancy, you just lucked out my friend.

Look at it this way.

You may have wanted more out of it, but that will be a mandatory factor in most other girls you meet. A one night stand like that is more rare. Its a shame you were drunk though, you may have liked it more if you were completely coherent.

 

[Spacewolf]

My first time was just a disapointing as all of those big hyped up things usually are if you enjoyed it at least thats summthing

 

[Spoonius]

Think of it this way: that was a practice run. You'll lose your virginity the first time you make love.

 

[Gralian]

Look on the bright side; first time always sucks, so there's the chance that you might be able to skip that awkward stage when you decide to have meaningful sex with someone you love for the first time, which is far more important than a drunken fling with someone you don't know.

 

[dertyqwerty]

Reading this all I can think about is this song,
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PkxBrBIxxlM

If you can tolerate it, it might make you feel better?