my sister has a drinking problem

[atombeast707]

first off: a little back story.

I am 16 years old, and i have two sisters, one being 22 and the other being 24. I am at the age of experimentation, and as my 22 year old sister has no qualms with buying me alcohol or marijuana, we have developed a relationship based fairly on intoxicants.

Now: recently this same 22 year old sister has been being a little more into drinking than usual, getting blacked out most every time she drinks and even was driven to a house by a stranger where they had to break a window to get in the house (also she lost her phone) because of this event (because having most of your family think you're dead is a bad thing), i was under the impression that she would try and find her limit with drinking, and rarely have this problem again. i was just called by her, however, in a wasted and belligerent state, only knowing the general area of where she was (and is). she asked me to come pick her up, even though she wasn't sure she needed a ride. she insisted she was safe, and not really knowing what to do, told her to call me if she needs a ride later.

now, i want to discourage (to put it lightly) her from getting into this state again, but i feel like it will somewhat hamper the relationship we have, and i am not the confrontational type. I don't know what to do and would like your opinions on the matter (please).

TLDR: sisters basically a drunk, dont know what to do about it because our relationship is based on getting fucked up

 

[Bezz_Ad]

You want to help so she can be a functional drunk and keep buying you booze and drugs, or do you want to stop it altogether?

 

[RandallJohn]

I think it'd be good to confront this if you think it's getting dangerous. Be prepared to scale back your own usage, though (as a solidarity thing.)

Does she think it's a problem?

 

[steeple]

and i am not the confrontational type

wheter or not you want to go in to this, it doesnt matter...
if you want to help your sister, you have to talk to her, and prefferably with the entire family.

so basicly, an intervention is what I suggest

 

[enlianykiy]

You want to help so she can be a functional drunk and keep buying you booze and drugs, or do you want to stop it altogether?

 

[Boris Goodenough]

Sounds to me like you both got problems.
Seriously, 16, the age of experimentation?
Right.. Perhaps you should grow up a bit and start using that brain of yours before you waste it..

It's pretty normal around these parts.

 

[atombeast707]

i want her to be a functional drunk, which is not where it is right now. from about a week and a half ago she was doing well (after the episode with breaking and entering and a very extreme but deserved yelling-at by my dad) at least up until tonight.

basically, i want to get fucked up with her, but not have to worry about her every time she leaves to go to the bar.


edit so as to not double post:

Sounds to me like you both got problems.
Seriously, 16, the age of experimentation?
Right.. Perhaps you should grow up a bit and start using that brain of yours before you waste it..

dude, you dont know me or the area i come from. I am a pot head, and an occasional drinker, but i still perform well in school (3.8 gpa with 4 AP classes) and i am still a smart person. my family is one of users, with everyone in my close family being, at one point in time, heavy smokers (pot, not cigs) and drinkers. my dad grew out of drinking, my mom grew out of both. my oldest sister is now unable to smoke, but does numerous other drugs as replacements. i was basically born into this, and most of my family started younger than i did. so you can now leave.

 

[Bezz_Ad]

In that case, considering everyone is involved in some way and open to it, why not an intervention, as one of the above posters said.

 

[Guitar Gamer]

I believe you simply cannot always have your cake and eat it too. Unless you have managed to be completely immune to the ever present dangers of being intoxicated (which would sorta make getting drunk pointless) I don't think you can simply ask what appears to be an alcoholic (or borderline alcoholic) to simply "ease back a bit." PErhaps you can if your sister listens well but generally you need to get into a better headspace before you can say your safe to drink again. And I don't think you can ask your sister to be a responsible drunk but also to get drunk/high/whatever with her underaged sibling without sounding like a hypocrite.
I know it may seem like there's got to be an easier way, without confrontation and cold turkey but I can't say there is.

 

[Rylot]

Sounds like she's got some pretty serious problems. I'm all for having fun and all but she might not have the personality that can control themselves around drugs and alcohol. It sounds like most of your family sees the problem so I recommend an intervention with the whole family. You might also have to choose between 'getting fucked up' with her and having a healthy sister. Granted I've got very little to go off of and don't know anyone personally, grain of salt and all that.

 

[Eri]

Sounds to me like you both got problems.
Seriously, 16, the age of experimentation?
Right.. Perhaps you should grow up a bit and start using that brain of yours before you waste it..

It's pretty normal around these parts.

Can do doesn't mean should

 

[afaceforradio]

Firstly, to sort out your sister's problems, you have to deal with your own. You're sixteen and doing drugs and drinking. Despite what your sister may have taught you this isn't normal, nor is it okay. Try and cut down on your own drinking and this might encourage her to do the same. Try and show her that having a drink is okay, but going out to get trollied isn't. But she won't listen to you if you tell her to cut back before cracking open a keg and a few joints.

 

[Nigh Invulnerable]

I was thinking "drinking problem" like from Airplane and I was going to suggest your sister aim more to the left so it actually hits her mouth.

 

[SL33TBL1ND]

Slap her upside the face every time you see her drunk. Negative reinforcement works wonders. But seriously, sit her down and talk to her.

 

[Boris Goodenough]

Can do doesn't mean should

That's a given, but living/experimenting a little (not full blown abuse) is not the worst thing that can be done.

Everything in moderation...

 

[atombeast707]

Firstly, to sort out your sister's problems, you have to deal with your own. You're sixteen and doing drugs and drinking. Despite what your sister may have taught you this isn't normal, nor is it okay. Try and cut down on your own drinking and this might encourage her to do the same. Try and show her that having a drink is okay, but going out to get trollied isn't. But she won't listen to you if you tell her to cut back before cracking open a keg and a few joints.

i realize i didn't make it clear up until now, but i actually do not drink all that often. the last time i drank was probably around 2 months ago. i do smoke often (like 5-6 times a week) but nowhere near as much as her (or my dad for that matter) i understand that not everyone has the same views on marijuana as my family, but being high to us is basically sober.

besides that, i do thank everyone for their advice, although it wasn't really what i wanted to hear (but then again, i had no idea what i expected or even wanted to hear)

 

[Paksenarrion]

Tell her how much you love her. Tell her how much you care. Tell her your worries, your fears.

Threaten to sing "Friday" the next time she's hungover.

End with a hug.

Spoiler: I couldn't find the video, so here's the quote

Peter: I think you'd make even more of a connection if you hugged her, too.

Miss Watson: Very good, Peter. That's true.

Peter: That's it. Now rub her back. Okay, that's good. Yeah, yeah, comfort her. Yeah, oh yeah, you like that, don't you? Yeah, it's okay. It's okay to like it. It's very natural. Okay, good. Good. Now smell her a little.

 

[Kyle Roberts]

Can do doesn't mean should

That's a given, but living/experimenting a little (not full blown abuse)

Well if its little uses be carefull around drugs because only a little can get you hooked so if anything make sure at she or you don't go near anything worse.
Also if anything it would help to keep an eye on her.

 

[Hashime]

Stop taking drugs yourself before even attempting to confront your sister. I would suggest getting the police involved next time a window needs to be broken to access her as they will most likely force her to go to a rehab centre.

Stopping yourself and her is paramount to her continued survival, as it is not a far step from alcohol and pot to club drugs and opiates, particularly when money gets tight for booze.