It has recently come to my attention that certain members of society that have the impulse to splurge vast sums of money for the highly unlikely probability of gaining an even greater sum in return. An activity known commonly as "gambling." To most this may seem an enjoyable pastime, if one that is best experienced in moderation for understandable monetary reasons.
Unfortunately, for a certain Few this impulse becomes addictive in nature and they cease to exist as a contributing member of society as the vast sums of money spent grows and the low probability of return in investment is enforced. Leading these now throughly pointless Chance-Junkies to fall into hole financial debt so deep that it would quite literally require a small mountain of money to escape, to possibly turn to criminal elements -usually in the form of loan sharks or petty theft- in order to perpetuate their addiction towards the throwing any of money for financial promises as substantial as oil flowing through the fingertips, and to use their penchant towards squandering money as a form of escapism from the problems caused by their squandering of money.
To further my concerns about these despicable Few, their unfortunate families and friends are likely to be negatively affected by the Few's utter lacking in the ability to control oneself. Truly compassionate and thus so much more unfortunate, family members or friends are known to go out of their way to make up for the faults of their personal Chance-Junkie by trying to satisfy their acquainted member of the Few's self-destructive needs and fiscal debts. Sometimes they try so hard to save these worthless individuals that they end up forgoing their own financial security and various other needs - a condition known as co-dependency. Other ways families and friends can be hurt by members of the Few include the introduction of a criminal element into a household and a lifestyle of poverty for the terribly unlucky dependents of one of the few. These are injustices which must be resolved, eradicated from the face of the earth for the betterment of mankind. We must utterly eliminate or reform Chance-Junkies and save them and those cursed to know them from their "gambling addiction."
Some ignorant fools believe in the current possible proposed solutions to the problem of Chance-Junkie epidemic; such as the prevalent outrageous contenders of therapy and support groups. How one could even think that such a light-handed approaches would even in the slightest succeed in turning the useless sacks of excrement in human form that are the Few into once again functioning, contributing members of society, boggles the mind. So in turn I will personally dismantle these arguments.
For starters one wonders why anyone let alone individuals as mentally fragile as Chance-Junkies would trust therapy when the professionals of said service call themselves therapists or 'the rapists'. Chance-junkies need to work through their psychological problems with the help of an individual trained to notice and interpret the trends of the mind; not be forced to suffer on of the most invasive forms of physical abuse known to man. Besides rape isn't enough of a solution to prevent the Few from indulging their urge to do away with their money, in fact the trauma suffered from the inevitable rape may further push them into their addiction as the escapism factor of atrocious money management strengthens in appeal.
Support groups are equally as worthless since as functioning members of society may not know; support groups tend to devolve from the initially healthy "lets get together to help each other with our problems" into "lets get together to pool our resources to enable an increase in efficiency in our criminal activities." Which is to say, support groups are simply the breeding grounds criminal groups, gangs or other depraved, illegal gatherings. This goes completely against what must be accomplished; common sense necessitates the destruction of Chance-Junkies not the provision of means to create some form of outlandish secret society.
Now on the ruins of my popular opponents I shall propose the solution that will single-handedly devastate the population of the Few, that will make the Chance-Junkie rue the day they ever played their first hand of poker or rolled their first dice, that will save the victims of the fate the caused them of be related to or the friend of one of the Few and in fact will once again enable them financially. The International Russian Roulette League or the IRRL.
The IRRL will be a simple spectacle sport that Chance-Junkies will be forced to participate. Chance-Junkies will of course be carefully selected based on a careful criteria that ensures that Participants are in all but name card-carrying members of the Few. Participants, in groups of six, will be brought into a room where they will be seated in a row based on a randomly selected order - the first aspect of "chance" introduced to the game. They will be provided a simple .44 magnum revolver loaded with exactly five bullets with which the Participants will attempt to shoot themselves while suitable dramatic music permeates the background. For further dramatic tension as the revolver is passed from one Chance-Junkie to the next the chamber of the revolver will be spun, adding another aspect of ?chance? to this wonderful sport that will have the audience on the edge of their seat in anticipation. The gun will continue to passed until only one of the Few remains. This entire event will broadcast in excruciating detail, with added effects including slow-motion breakdowns of Participant death.
That lucky Participant will leave the IRRL with both his life and the majority of the advertisement profits which will be put to use in order to free the winning Chance-Junkie and their family and friends from their financial debt. The remaining currency the Chance-Junkie will be given free reign over. As the IRRL will be a compassionate sports organization that completely understands the loss that the family and friends of the ...unfortunate five other Participants; financial support will be given to free the families of the losing Chance-Junkies from the debt caused by their now plant-fodder Chance-Junkie, the IRRL will also pay for the cremation of these Participants. Funerals will not be included.
As all goes well, the winning Chance-Junkie will be so traumatized by their participation in the IRRL that they will forever lose their taste for money management- the deceased Participants of the IRRL will forever be unable to once more squander their spending power for obvious reasons- , victimized individuals of the Few will be financially compensated for their suffering, and the international community benefits both from the mass migration by Chance-Junkies away from gambling after seeing the example made of their fellow brethren, as well as, the dramatic, exciting spectator sport that will introduced to the world. Winning Chance-Junkies are to be reminded that if they do not leave the destructive ways behind that participation in the IRRL is not necessarily a singular event.
Unfortunately, for a certain Few this impulse becomes addictive in nature and they cease to exist as a contributing member of society as the vast sums of money spent grows and the low probability of return in investment is enforced. Leading these now throughly pointless Chance-Junkies to fall into hole financial debt so deep that it would quite literally require a small mountain of money to escape, to possibly turn to criminal elements -usually in the form of loan sharks or petty theft- in order to perpetuate their addiction towards the throwing any of money for financial promises as substantial as oil flowing through the fingertips, and to use their penchant towards squandering money as a form of escapism from the problems caused by their squandering of money.
To further my concerns about these despicable Few, their unfortunate families and friends are likely to be negatively affected by the Few's utter lacking in the ability to control oneself. Truly compassionate and thus so much more unfortunate, family members or friends are known to go out of their way to make up for the faults of their personal Chance-Junkie by trying to satisfy their acquainted member of the Few's self-destructive needs and fiscal debts. Sometimes they try so hard to save these worthless individuals that they end up forgoing their own financial security and various other needs - a condition known as co-dependency. Other ways families and friends can be hurt by members of the Few include the introduction of a criminal element into a household and a lifestyle of poverty for the terribly unlucky dependents of one of the few. These are injustices which must be resolved, eradicated from the face of the earth for the betterment of mankind. We must utterly eliminate or reform Chance-Junkies and save them and those cursed to know them from their "gambling addiction."
Some ignorant fools believe in the current possible proposed solutions to the problem of Chance-Junkie epidemic; such as the prevalent outrageous contenders of therapy and support groups. How one could even think that such a light-handed approaches would even in the slightest succeed in turning the useless sacks of excrement in human form that are the Few into once again functioning, contributing members of society, boggles the mind. So in turn I will personally dismantle these arguments.
For starters one wonders why anyone let alone individuals as mentally fragile as Chance-Junkies would trust therapy when the professionals of said service call themselves therapists or 'the rapists'. Chance-junkies need to work through their psychological problems with the help of an individual trained to notice and interpret the trends of the mind; not be forced to suffer on of the most invasive forms of physical abuse known to man. Besides rape isn't enough of a solution to prevent the Few from indulging their urge to do away with their money, in fact the trauma suffered from the inevitable rape may further push them into their addiction as the escapism factor of atrocious money management strengthens in appeal.
Support groups are equally as worthless since as functioning members of society may not know; support groups tend to devolve from the initially healthy "lets get together to help each other with our problems" into "lets get together to pool our resources to enable an increase in efficiency in our criminal activities." Which is to say, support groups are simply the breeding grounds criminal groups, gangs or other depraved, illegal gatherings. This goes completely against what must be accomplished; common sense necessitates the destruction of Chance-Junkies not the provision of means to create some form of outlandish secret society.
Now on the ruins of my popular opponents I shall propose the solution that will single-handedly devastate the population of the Few, that will make the Chance-Junkie rue the day they ever played their first hand of poker or rolled their first dice, that will save the victims of the fate the caused them of be related to or the friend of one of the Few and in fact will once again enable them financially. The International Russian Roulette League or the IRRL.
The IRRL will be a simple spectacle sport that Chance-Junkies will be forced to participate. Chance-Junkies will of course be carefully selected based on a careful criteria that ensures that Participants are in all but name card-carrying members of the Few. Participants, in groups of six, will be brought into a room where they will be seated in a row based on a randomly selected order - the first aspect of "chance" introduced to the game. They will be provided a simple .44 magnum revolver loaded with exactly five bullets with which the Participants will attempt to shoot themselves while suitable dramatic music permeates the background. For further dramatic tension as the revolver is passed from one Chance-Junkie to the next the chamber of the revolver will be spun, adding another aspect of ?chance? to this wonderful sport that will have the audience on the edge of their seat in anticipation. The gun will continue to passed until only one of the Few remains. This entire event will broadcast in excruciating detail, with added effects including slow-motion breakdowns of Participant death.
That lucky Participant will leave the IRRL with both his life and the majority of the advertisement profits which will be put to use in order to free the winning Chance-Junkie and their family and friends from their financial debt. The remaining currency the Chance-Junkie will be given free reign over. As the IRRL will be a compassionate sports organization that completely understands the loss that the family and friends of the ...unfortunate five other Participants; financial support will be given to free the families of the losing Chance-Junkies from the debt caused by their now plant-fodder Chance-Junkie, the IRRL will also pay for the cremation of these Participants. Funerals will not be included.
As all goes well, the winning Chance-Junkie will be so traumatized by their participation in the IRRL that they will forever lose their taste for money management- the deceased Participants of the IRRL will forever be unable to once more squander their spending power for obvious reasons- , victimized individuals of the Few will be financially compensated for their suffering, and the international community benefits both from the mass migration by Chance-Junkies away from gambling after seeing the example made of their fellow brethren, as well as, the dramatic, exciting spectator sport that will introduced to the world. Winning Chance-Junkies are to be reminded that if they do not leave the destructive ways behind that participation in the IRRL is not necessarily a singular event.
