Poll: Judicial Duel: Your Weapon of Choice

Recommended Videos

demoman_chaos

New member
May 25, 2009
2,254
0
0
You have been challenged by your evil (or good) twin to a trial of arms. He presents to you several options. The choices are limited, but the first pick goes to you. Read through your choices carefully, as the wrong choice may lead to your demise. I've provided information on each weapon, based on how they were


The hand axe is a powerful weapon, but loaded with myths that hide its true potential. The hand axe weighs between 2-3 lbs, with a very blade heavy balance. With some coordination, the axe can be very fast and agile. Working with the axe will make it work with you, not doing so will result in it working against you. The axe is great for hooking weapons, and limbs. The axe is capable of lethal thrusts with the point, and the beard can dig into the body for severe damage.
This combo comes with a shield, 30 inch diameter viking style center grip weighing in the 9 lb range. It can take a beating well, while still remaining agile. The center grip gives mobility, and a skilled warrior can use the handle as a point of pivot as he strikes and never open himself to counter attack. A very deadly combo for those that know how to use it.


The spear was the most common battlefield weapon on almost all battlefields, and the pike was being considered for use by the Confederates in the US Civil War. More people have died by a spear point than any other weapon in human history. The spear sports a long reach, light weight, and great defense. It can be used like a staff, while also being able to deliver a lethal thrust at anytime. If you can control the range you will almost always win, but if you can't control the range you will not survive.


The quintessential blade of the knightly class, a double edged weapon capable of cutting a man in half while also being able to puncture armor and smash skulls. Weighing in between 3 and 5 lbs on average, the longsword is a very capable weapon. The large crossguard is very helpful in binding and controlling enemy weapons, and the back edge opens up many more options than other swords. The pommel is fully capable of crushing skulls, likely being where the phrase "to pommel someone to death" comes from. An agile and deadly thrusting weapon, brutal skull spliter, and delicate cutter all in one purpose built weapon of war.


The fast and precise katana is a deadly cutting tool with a capable point. It is famed for cleaving men in half, some are said to split apart 3 or more at a time. Weighing 3 to 5 lbs with a gentle curve, the katana delivers efficient cutting power in elegant form.


The rapier is the weapon of the Musketeers, unmatched thrusting power and a beautifully crafted hilt. The rapier is fast with pinpoint thrusts, capable of sniping openings the enemy didn't know existed. It has long reach, which works against it once the enemy is past the point. Good footwork and distance control will keep all foes on their toes and your tip on target.


The sabre is a curved single handed weapon favored in the East and by 17th Century cavalry. It is built to give a deadly cut, but is able to sneak around defenses for a surprise thrust. The balance allows quick strikes and recoveries while also granting strong blows. It is the best weapon for push cuts (pushing forward as you cut), deadly and quick attacks.


The naginata is essentially a sword on a stick. It sports long reach, powerful cuts, strong thrusts, and staff like moves. It is great for keeping the enemy away until you are read to strike, but can handle itself better in close range than a spear. It is slower than a spear though, and takes more skill to utilize the potential of. Never underestimate a man with a naginata.


The Zweihander is a devastating weapon, among the strongest choice. It has good range, with a 6 lb balanced weight allowing a large fellow to use it with great agility. The foregrip allows great control. The guard gives great protection and options for defense and attack. THe pommel balances the blade while also being a powerful killing tool. It is a great middle ground for a polearm and a sword.

The choice is yours, so how will you choose and why?

Personally, hand axe and shield would be my go to. The protection of the shield and its ability to make up for any range disadvantage would counter spears, while the hand axe can be used at a variety of ranges for a variety of attacks. Variety is the spice of life.
 

Zhukov

The Laughing Arsehole
Dec 29, 2009
13,769
5
43
Uh... can I get a flanged mace and a shield?

I don't actually know how to use a long blade or a polearm, so most of those aren't going to be any more dangerous in my hands than in the hands of any other schmuck. In particular, I would have no clue how to parry properly.

On the other hand, I'm solidly built enough that I'm pretty sure I could put someone out of action with one solid ding from a mace and putting a shield between me and the sharp thing coming towards me is at least a fairly simple concept.
 

Keoul

New member
Apr 4, 2010
1,579
0
0
I'd go with a spear.
Longest reach and if you know how to use it right, it can hit the fastest as well. There's also the sneaky manouvers you could pull off with a spear like pole vaults. You're opponent would be to afraid to get close and even if they did you could use it as a bo staff and beat them to submission.
 

Scarim Coral

Jumped the ship
Legacy
Oct 29, 2010
18,157
2
3
Country
UK
I go for the sabre. A couple of them would be too heavy for me to properly swing it and the other seen to require some skills/ know how to use it before hand. Granted the same can be said with the Sabre but I can easily see myself using it well defence wise.
 

magicmonkeybars

Gullible Dolt
Nov 20, 2007
908
0
0
Obviously the rapier, it's a gentlemen's weapon, also the lightest blade so it'll be easier to wield and stabbing while keeping out of range of the opponent seems a good strategy.
 

Yuno Gasai

Queen of Yandere
Nov 6, 2010
2,587
0
0
I'd opt for the Katana. Let's get some beautifully destructive blade dancing on the go!

I prefer lightweight weapons, since my physical strength leaves something to be desired. Something lightweight but still deadly gives me the freedom to parry my evil twin's attacks without tiring myself out too much.
 

Esotera

New member
May 5, 2011
3,400
0
0
I'd go with the spear, it's the only weapon on there that presents a ranged option, and even without that you've still got the advantage of controlling a couple more feet than any other weapon. My second choice would be the shield and axe, simply because I know how to use an axe and swords require a bit of practice to use correctly. The shield gives the chance to deflect killing blows and is a pretty useful weapon in itself if the axe is lost...
 

Greg White

New member
Sep 19, 2012
233
0
0
I'll take the 2-hander sword.

It's going to be an even match regardless of what weapon I go with, so I may as well go with one I can do more with than swing and poke.
 

Phrozenflame500

New member
Dec 26, 2012
1,080
0
0
Assuming my evil twin is equally inept will all of the above choices, I'll go with the spear. The range advantage should counter all the others except maybe the axe/shield, which would be my second pick.
 

Evil Smurf

Admin of Catoholics Anonymous
Nov 11, 2011
11,597
0
0
If my evil twin is like me, I can distract him with shiny things and pictures of unicorns :3
 

Thomas Barnsley

New member
Mar 8, 2012
410
0
0
Naginata looks good. It has distance, it has stabiness, it has slashiness, and it isn't too heavy. Apparently it requires skill to 'unlock it's full potential', but I don't need all that much to kill my derpy evil twin.
 

King of Asgaard

Vae Victis, Woe to the Conquered
Oct 31, 2011
1,926
0
0
SimpleThunda said:
It kind of matters in what kind of armor we're fighting.
Seconded, it makes all the difference if we're in full platemail or a leather cuirass.

Assuming we're in no armour, to be as light as possible, I choose the Rapier, because I've actually trained with that thing, so I could hold my own.
If OP states whether or not armour is in use, and to what degree, I'll edit my choice accordingly.
 

Nemusus

New member
Jun 10, 2013
68
0
0
If Shogun 2: Total War has taught me anything, it's to go with the Naginata. Not only are Naginata troops quite badass, but the length of the blade and its own inherent reach mean it beats the spear, and you can slash rather than stab against the sword lads. If I play it well, the chubby bugger won't get near me.
 

OneCatch

New member
Jun 19, 2010
1,111
0
0
I'd say the axe, purely because it also gives you a shield. That's a major force multiplier, especially given that untrained and unconditioned people (like me) typically aren't very offensive or aggressive when put into a combat situation.
Also, as much as I can fantasise, I probably wouldn't have the coordination to use a sword properly either in offence, or more importantly, in defence.

Second choice would be spear for similar reasons - it's got better range and compliments defensive instincts - it's no coincidence that citizen militias throughout history have used spears.

After that.... the Naginata, then everything else.

Last choice would be the Zweihander. That can fuck right off. They're cool, but utterly impractical for anyone who's not absurdly well trained.
 

A.A.K

New member
Mar 7, 2009
970
0
0
i have some skill with katana, spear and guan dao..... given the guan dao isn't an option, I'll pick the naginata.
 

Vicarious Reality

New member
Jul 10, 2011
1,398
0
0
Weird, am i the second person that realizes the usefulness of a proper zweihander
Onehand swords are quite bad unless you have a shield or two blades
I am planning on getting the Albion Maximilian
 

Dirty Hipsters

This is how we praise the sun!
Legacy
Feb 7, 2011
8,802
3,383
118
Country
'Merica
Gender
3 children in a trench coat
I'd definitely go with the spear. With my being naturally tall and fast it's a weapon that plays completely to my strengths.

You get to control the range of the fight, and it's a pretty simple task to keep out of reach of your opponent's weapon so long as you can keep your eye on them and not have to worry about accidentally backing into things (something that shouldn't be a problem in a one on one fight outside of a battlefield). The best thing about this weapon is that you can attack your opponent's feet without putting yourself in danger, and considering none of the other weapons on this list offer anywhere near the kind of range that a spear does, it means that the easiest way to win the fight would be to trip your opponent and go in for the kill while they're on the ground.

Ungentlemanly? Perhaps, but combat isn't exactly a gentlemanly pursuit.