Poll: People being Jerks to Female Gamers?

[PikaPika2]

I'm not a girl, but my GF is. She's a gamer, and that's how we got together; same interests. But people at school are being jerks to her. She tells me that people are picking on her, saying "Girls can't play video games, boys are always better and girls suck!" BULL. FREAKING. SH*T. She has won a bunch of games against me and my friends. It's like we're practically the same person. But people STILL decide to bash on her EVEN MORE for that. My girlfriend needs advice. Any from you guys? Or girls?

 

[Elfgore]

What advice can I give other than ignore them? This is just a perfect example of people being assholes. Nothing more I can really say.

 

[PikaPika2]

I know, any ways to cheer her up though?

 

[Lilikins]

hmm, well to be fully honest on this topic..

My Fiancee is also a rabid gamer, she sticks to specific genres but nevertheless she still loves gaming. Just really, if I may? Seeing as the misses does the same? Just tell her not to let it get to her, sure folks can talk shit all day but nevertheless that wont change the fact your girlfriend likes gaming. (I donno how old you are but nevertheless...I still see every person that way that acts as childish as your describing them...) Kids are mean..hehe.

Tell her to wear it loud and proud so to speak. Hell, what we did in that aspect (there was also one person who was along the lines of what your descrbing), got them in a duel...and she wiped the floor with him. He blamed it on lag, after 6 times of getting his arse handed to him in a handbag he said she was lucky. Nevertheless though he shut up about it and didnt mention again. Or well, he did once, to which she countered that if he wants another go she'll gladly abide to wiping the floor with him again.

But really, folks talk crap all day dont let it get to you or your interests, if your having fun in your relationship, thats all that counts in my opinion.

Hoping it was of some help hehe and game on.

PS: Welcome to the Escapist PikaPika2

PPS: By the way, just thought Id remark, you might want to edit your title to remove 'Poll' if you dont have a poll up.

 

[Elfgore]

Game with her? Sounds like she enjoys it, so that might cheer her up. I don't know if the people harassing her are online or IRL people, but if they're online. Just don't play with a mic for a bit. Play some Co-op games with her. I know she should be able to play with a mic on and be fine, but you know how people are.

 

[Aramis Night]

It seems that a lot of people seem to make the mistake of taking these sorts of situations at face value. The majority of the time when people say things like this to women, it is more to goad them rather than because they genuinely believe that women suffer from some inferiority. If anything it is more of an attempt to amuse themselves at the expense of a woman's insecurity since women don't typically have the same sort of ability to just let trash talk slide the way most boys learn to. Largely because boys usually get accustomed to it early on socially. It's basically because a lot of boys/men get a kick out of knowing that their words alone can have a major affect on a girl/woman in a way that it doesn't tend to affect other men/boys. Essentially it is a form of trolling. They tend to target things that they figure will be more likely a source of insecurity for most women because they are looking for a deep impact which is why they tend to go with gendered stereotypes about women. Not because they necessarily believe that they are true of the person or are misogynists, but because they simply want the biggest impact on their target and most women tend to get really defensive over such things.

Of course if a woman rises to the challenge or doesn't let the attempt to rattle them get to them at all, then the person will usually stop and even give them a certain level of respect. I know its common behavior for a lot of guys sadly and it can get pretty tiresome for women to have to go through that too many times, but at some point often what happens is the person that may have tried to troll her initially may actually start sticking up for her when others start in on her.

I think it would do women a lot of good to not take what boys/men say so seriously. The sooner they realize how full of it us guys can be, they better off they will be. Tbh I have always found women's insecurities to be really puzzling as they often do not have much reason to be insecure about the things they are.

I'm not defending this behavior in any way. Just something I have noticed from the sidelines. My own woman is a gamer too and she is pretty good at it. She also isn't above schooling fools who try to put her gaming skills down.

 

[ultratog1028]

"If you cannot accept someone not like you sharing your interests, you do not deserve to have those interests."

Who gives a crap who games? My opponent can be a 3 tentacled Gazorbian from Zxalor 7. What does it matter?

Though some of it is smack talk most likely, but that doesn't make it right. Gaming is not some Chivalry Knight's Code of Honor where certain people can only participate in Combat. We gave up that right the first time someone typed "******" in in-game chat.

People who are immature about other players are simply brats. Entitled little children. A Mature Gamer respects all his foes.

 

[Smooth Operator]

It's school and it's children, they will find something to haze you about in absolutely every circumstance, even if you had nothing out of the ordinary to talk about they would haze you for being ordinary.
So you either wear earmuffs, beat people to death, or start growing a thicker skin. I would go for the last one because as long as people exist there will be someone to annoy you with something.

 

[Johnny Impact]

Pecking orders are part of human society and development. There's nothing you can do about that. Kids like to talk shit, because if you can talk shit and get away with it, you establish superiority and move up the social ladder. It's much easier than actually doing something and it has almost the same effect.

They're also doing it because they feel threatened. If you can't learn to ignore the taunts, what I suggest is make the threat real. Challenge them publicly to a match, then wtfbbqpwnzor them like the little bitches they are. If she wins, she can hold it over them forever. If she loses, at least she made them put their money where their mouths were. I know, sounds like a teen movie.

 

[iLikeHippos]

It doesn't matter if you are being insulted if nothing of what they are saying is not your fault, or even true. The problem is only as big as you choose it to be in this case, as it doesn't seem to affect mental, social or physical state on either of you.

If idiots are talking smack, pay them no mind. If they are being disrespectful, rude, or plainly stupid, why should you pay enough respect to reply or even heed what they say? It's crap, and you know it. Why bother caring?

Me, for example, am not a gamer girl, but I am quite adapt at games; so much, in fact, that I've been called a hacker, cheater or cheap, when I've done what I can to NOT be any of those three. I know I am not fitting in any of those three categories, so I simply delete and ignore any message sent my way that calls me out on something I have no part in. They are clearly idiots, who reason like boors.

It's what I've learned from playing on Xbox Live for 5 years.

 

[AimAssist]

I have two girls that are old enough to play Minecraft, but there's no chance I'm letting them online with a mic and voice chat turned on.

I actually like the hardline stance some companies take in regards to griefing and poor behavior. Everybody has bad days, but subjecting anonymous people to that attitude shows a distinct lack of accountability.

 

[Chasing-The-Light]

I agree with a lot of the answers being posted by others here, and I want to affirm them since I'm actually a gamer girl.

When I was a lot younger kids used to say things to me like, "You can't play pokemon with us. Girls can't play pokemon." And it used to make me really angry, like somehow something in how I was born makes me ill-fit to play with them. I didn't let it stop me, but it did take a toll in it's own way. Because I was trying to show them that I could play too it cut a lot harder when they criticized the things I did, or the things I liked, and I still have a lot of that today.

Coming from this I have to say that the best thing your girlfriend can do is ignore them. Nobody should get to bully someone out of the things they enjoy doing. So ignore what they say and kick their ass at every time you're given the chance! They'll shut up eventually, and even if they don't, you really have to consider, are they really all that important in the scheme of things anyway?

 

[Malpraxis]

Maybe it's a good point in life for you and your girlfriend to have a small realization: People will bash you for everything that brings joy to your life. Ignore them and surround yourself with people who bash you less.