Edit: Hi Everybody! Wow, I can't believe how popular this is turning out to be, considering it was the brainchild of work-related boredom and insomnia! Just a heads up, I've made some small changes to the post, just to reflect the new version that has been posted in the Forum Games and RP forum, go there if you're interested!
First and foremost: This is fiction, I had some fun writing some crap, and I hope you have fun reading it. There is nothing here that is fact, or even within the realms of normal coherency, keep that in mind while you're reading. Let's not start a flame war here, people!
Yes, I was bored, yes, I know it's stupid, and yes, I do hope you have as much fun battling this out in the comments as I had coming up with the most far-fetched things I could think of. Enjoy!
PS. Hey, if you can think of any great ideas for tribes and whatnot, feel free to elaborate!
PPS. Thanks to all the suggestions, I've added some more clans. Special thanks to Kimchi for giving me the basis of the Order of Eight.
First and foremost: This is fiction, I had some fun writing some crap, and I hope you have fun reading it. There is nothing here that is fact, or even within the realms of normal coherency, keep that in mind while you're reading. Let's not start a flame war here, people!
In 2008, they came. Casual Gamers. In their hearts, nothing but disdain for the shooters, the RTSs, The MMOs, the Point-and-click adventures. In their hands, the optional Sword-and-Shield attachements ($15.99, available everywhere). In their heads, thoughts of jobs and families and other pointless bullshit that takes time away from level grinding. What they lacked in technical and physical prowess, they made up in sheer numbers. We were overrun within six months.
The Governers of The Escapist tried to appease the rising masses, devoting more time to their Motion-sensing, graphically limited god. Even allowing the annexing of the Unforgotten Realms, the last bastion of those pilgrims who risked their very lives travelling across the land in search of true Gamedom. But still these Casual warriors strove to bend the entire Escapist to their every whim. Even with the Casuals becoming the greatest of the four tribes, they sought to turn the other three into mere shadows of their former selves, their items of worship made to resemble the Casual god.
However, all is not lost. Much of the Hardcore tribes have fled into the areas of the Escapist Casuals dare not go. Politics and Religion, User Reviews, and Gaming discussion. Slowly they prepare for the coming war:
The Playstation tribe, Few in number, but truly the largest people ever to heft a DualShock. Their Blu-Rays reflect the sun even in darkest night.
The Clan of the Xbox, once abundant, lost many to the lures of the Casuals. Those that remain, however, still possess the high-pitched voices, sheer skill and determination of this thick-headed clan.
And finally, The PC Dynasty, the most widely varied of the tribes. Known for their intelligence and accuracy, they are still atoning for their hand in the formation of the Casuals, dabbling as they did in the black arts of Flash and Java.
While they fight for the same cause, there is much tension between the tribes. No two fully prepared to declare themselves anything more than 'Allies'. Especially the tensions that rise over the preferred weapons of the tribes, with a major rift between those that favour the heavy-handed yet versatile wireless analogue-sticks-and-buttons, and those that would prefer the overly-delicate yet more precise Keyboard-and-mouse. No tribe will ever truly be at peace, with the ever-looming threat of the Casuals, and the silent fear of those whom they fight alongside.
But it is not only the Hardcore tribes that join this alliegence to rid the casual scourge. Kingoms and fiefdoms within The Escapist remain staunchly independant, and fight for their honour alone:
The Kingdom of Crowshaw has thus far managed to keep the Casual army at bay. Their King rules with an Iron Fist, and deals swift and harsh justice to anyone or anything that may dare to stray outside the strict guidelines and laws that have passed under his cruel and bitter hand.
The Monks of the Unforgotten Realm, once peaceful and welcoming to those who risk the journey to their gaming Mecca, chose to ecape underground, away from the tyrranical new rule of the Casual puppet council. Betrayed by The Escapist government, they choose to fight for themselves, ruled as they are by the Game Dogs of War, and their Axes. Already they attack and retreat frequently, never allowing The Escapist's government or their Casual handlers to forget the name of the once great city that they cruelly snuffed the life from.
All over the land, those Moderators who did not follow their goverment into submission remain to take care of the land. However, their methods are ham-fisted and painful. Choosing to outright banish and clear-cut entire areas of the Escapist at the first sign of upheaval - they side with neither the Casual opressors or the Hardcore rebels, they exist only to save their beloved home from the flames that may soon consume it.
Inside their great and pixellated longhouse, reside the most Ancient Order of The Eight. Born of a time when all gaming was hardcore, and only the toughest survived, these old and weathered veterans of the Console Wars are the source of all Gaming Wisdom throughout The Escapist. The Ancient Order have remained neutral throughout the Civil War, having seen the best and worst of themselves in both sides.
But there rises another force, one that threatens all factions, and may come to destroy The Escapist itself. Without the controlling hand of the great tribes, and The Escapist government, the Horde of Forum Trolls has once again risen out of relative obscurity to take over all parts of The Escapist. Unchecked, they are poised to do untold damage to all, not caring for politics or allies, they seek only to destroy for their own hedonistic pleasure...
The time of Civil war draws near, once again. Choose your side, find your alliegences!
The Governers of The Escapist tried to appease the rising masses, devoting more time to their Motion-sensing, graphically limited god. Even allowing the annexing of the Unforgotten Realms, the last bastion of those pilgrims who risked their very lives travelling across the land in search of true Gamedom. But still these Casual warriors strove to bend the entire Escapist to their every whim. Even with the Casuals becoming the greatest of the four tribes, they sought to turn the other three into mere shadows of their former selves, their items of worship made to resemble the Casual god.
However, all is not lost. Much of the Hardcore tribes have fled into the areas of the Escapist Casuals dare not go. Politics and Religion, User Reviews, and Gaming discussion. Slowly they prepare for the coming war:
The Playstation tribe, Few in number, but truly the largest people ever to heft a DualShock. Their Blu-Rays reflect the sun even in darkest night.
The Clan of the Xbox, once abundant, lost many to the lures of the Casuals. Those that remain, however, still possess the high-pitched voices, sheer skill and determination of this thick-headed clan.
And finally, The PC Dynasty, the most widely varied of the tribes. Known for their intelligence and accuracy, they are still atoning for their hand in the formation of the Casuals, dabbling as they did in the black arts of Flash and Java.
While they fight for the same cause, there is much tension between the tribes. No two fully prepared to declare themselves anything more than 'Allies'. Especially the tensions that rise over the preferred weapons of the tribes, with a major rift between those that favour the heavy-handed yet versatile wireless analogue-sticks-and-buttons, and those that would prefer the overly-delicate yet more precise Keyboard-and-mouse. No tribe will ever truly be at peace, with the ever-looming threat of the Casuals, and the silent fear of those whom they fight alongside.
But it is not only the Hardcore tribes that join this alliegence to rid the casual scourge. Kingoms and fiefdoms within The Escapist remain staunchly independant, and fight for their honour alone:
The Kingdom of Crowshaw has thus far managed to keep the Casual army at bay. Their King rules with an Iron Fist, and deals swift and harsh justice to anyone or anything that may dare to stray outside the strict guidelines and laws that have passed under his cruel and bitter hand.
The Monks of the Unforgotten Realm, once peaceful and welcoming to those who risk the journey to their gaming Mecca, chose to ecape underground, away from the tyrranical new rule of the Casual puppet council. Betrayed by The Escapist government, they choose to fight for themselves, ruled as they are by the Game Dogs of War, and their Axes. Already they attack and retreat frequently, never allowing The Escapist's government or their Casual handlers to forget the name of the once great city that they cruelly snuffed the life from.
All over the land, those Moderators who did not follow their goverment into submission remain to take care of the land. However, their methods are ham-fisted and painful. Choosing to outright banish and clear-cut entire areas of the Escapist at the first sign of upheaval - they side with neither the Casual opressors or the Hardcore rebels, they exist only to save their beloved home from the flames that may soon consume it.
Inside their great and pixellated longhouse, reside the most Ancient Order of The Eight. Born of a time when all gaming was hardcore, and only the toughest survived, these old and weathered veterans of the Console Wars are the source of all Gaming Wisdom throughout The Escapist. The Ancient Order have remained neutral throughout the Civil War, having seen the best and worst of themselves in both sides.
But there rises another force, one that threatens all factions, and may come to destroy The Escapist itself. Without the controlling hand of the great tribes, and The Escapist government, the Horde of Forum Trolls has once again risen out of relative obscurity to take over all parts of The Escapist. Unchecked, they are poised to do untold damage to all, not caring for politics or allies, they seek only to destroy for their own hedonistic pleasure...
The time of Civil war draws near, once again. Choose your side, find your alliegences!
The Story of the Civil War:
In 2008, they rose. Casual Gamers. In their hearts, nothing but disdain for the shooters, the RTSs, The MMOs, the Point-and-click adventures. In their hands, the optional Sword-and-Shield attachements ($15.99, available everywhere). In their heads, thoughts of jobs and families and other pointless bullshit that takes time away from level grinding. What they lacked in technical and physical prowess, they made up in sheer numbers. We were overrun within six months.
The Governors of The Escapist tried to appease the rising masses, devoting more time to their Motion-sensing, graphically limited god. Even allowing the annexing of the Unforgotten Realms, the last bastion of those pilgrims who risked their very lives travelling across the land in search of true Gamedom. But still these Casual warriors strove to bend the entire Escapist to their every whim. Even with the Casuals becoming the greatest of the four tribes, they sought to turn the other three into mere shadows of their former selves, their items of worship made to resemble the Casual god.
However, all is not lost. Much of the Hardcore tribes have fled into the areas of the Escapist Casuals dare not go. Politics and Religion, User Reviews, and Gaming discussion. Slowly they prepare for the coming war.
Core Tribes:
The Casual Gamers: Until the insurgency, the Casuals were by far the least organised and least militaristic of the Four great tribes, Choosing instead to dedicate themselves to decadence and hedonism. The least powerful of the tribes, the Casuals however have developed an awesome weapon. Completely modular, with attachments ranging from melee weapons to long-range projectile throwers, this has proven the edge needed by the Casuals, against the much more traditionalistic weapons of the rest of The Escapist's many factions. Also to their advantage is sheer numbers, with near double the warriors of the next-biggest tribe...
The Clan of the Xbox: Once abundant, during the initial takeover by the Casual Gamers, many of the Xbox clansmen were lost to the lures of the Casual, agreeing most readily to the terms laid down by the conquering Casuals. Those that remain true to the Hardcore, however, still possess the high-pitched voices, sheer technical skill and brick-headed determination they are renowned for. Never known to give up without a fight, the Xbox clansmen are great warriors, stopping at nothing to attain victory.
The Playstation tribe: Generations ago, this tribe were the most powerful and undisputed of the four tribes within the land. Sadly, as the years have passed, their numbers have dwindled as other more prominent clans have risen to power. Although relatively small in number, the Tribes people of Playstation are by far the largest and most powerful of the various Clans, with a staunch dedication to the Hardcore.
And finally, The PC Dynasty: The most widely varying of the tribes. With physical appearance, power, intelligence, and temperament varying wildly from tribesman to tribesman, the PC Dynasty still have their feet firmly planted in the Hardcore. Dynasty are revered amongst all people within The Escapist. Known for their fearsome accuracy using the weapon of their choice - Mouse and Keyboard - they are still atoning for their hand in the formation of the Casuals, dabbling as they did in the black arts of Flash and Java.
While they fight for the same cause, there is much tension between the tribes. No two are fully prepared to declare themselves anything more than 'Allies'. Especially obvious are the tensions that rise over the preferred weapons of the tribes, with a major rift between those that favour the heavy-handed yet versatile wireless analogue-sticks-and-buttons, and those that would prefer the overly-delicate yet more precise Keyboard-and-mouse. No tribe will ever truly be at peace, with the ever-looming threat of the Casuals, and the silent fear of those whom they fight alongside.
But it is not only the Hardcore tribes that join this allegiance to rid the casual scourge. Other peoples within The Escapist remain staunchly independent, and fight for their honour alone
Secondary Clans
The Kingdom of Crowshaw has thus far managed to keep the Casual army at bay. Their King rules with an Iron Fist, and deals swift and harsh justice to anyone or anything that may dare to stray outside the strict guidelines and laws that have passed under his cruel and bitter hand. Better known for diplomacy and verbosity rather than skills in battle, the people of Crowshaw nevertheless are fully prepared to lay down their lives in protection of their King, whom often regards his many subjects with annoyed surprise.
The Monks of the Unforgotten Realm, once peaceful and welcoming to those who risk the journey to their gaming Mecca, chose to escape underground, away from the tyrannical new rule of the Casual puppet council. Betrayed by The Escapist government, they choose to fight for themselves, ruled as they now are by the Game Dogs of War. Already they attack and retreat frequently, never allowing The Escapist's government or their Casual handlers to forget the name of the once great city that they cruelly snuffed the life from. Perfectly trained in the art of Pacifistic and Psychological warfare, the Monks abhor violence in all it's forms, choosing rather to undermine enemies' confidence and grip on reality
All over the land, those Moderators who did not follow their government into submission remain to take care of the land. However, their methods are ham-fisted and dangerous. Choosing to outright banish and clear-cut entire areas of the Escapist at the first sign of upheaval - they side with neither the Casual oppressors or the Hardcore rebels, they exist only to save their beloved home from the flames that may soon consume it. Immensely powerful, many moderators have become corrupted by the power within, and laid waste to vast areas of The Escapist.
Inside their great and pixellated longhouse, reside the most Ancient Order of The Eight. Born of a time when all gaming was hardcore, and only the toughest survived to see world 5-1, these old and weathered veterans of the Console Wars are the source of all Gaming Wisdom throughout The Escapist. The Ancient Order have remained neutral throughout the Civil War, having seen the best and worst of themselves in both sides. Preferring older and more outdated technology, the Order are still a force to be reckoned with, with their knowledge of gaming unsurpassed by anyone in the Escapist. They also are the sworn protectors of the Code of Konami, an unbelievably powerful spell that has the power to change the world, often for the good, often for the bad.
Finally there rises another force, one that threatens all factions, and may come to destroy The Escapist itself. Without the controlling hand of the great tribes, and The Escapist government, the Horde of Forum Trolls has once again risen out of relative obscurity to take over all parts of The Escapist. Although very unintelligent, and prone to bouts of near catatonic stupidity, if left unchecked, they are poised to do untold damage to all, not caring for politics or allies, as they seek only to destroy for their own hedonistic pleasure...
The time of Civil war draws near, once again. Choose your side, find your allegiances!
In 2008, they rose. Casual Gamers. In their hearts, nothing but disdain for the shooters, the RTSs, The MMOs, the Point-and-click adventures. In their hands, the optional Sword-and-Shield attachements ($15.99, available everywhere). In their heads, thoughts of jobs and families and other pointless bullshit that takes time away from level grinding. What they lacked in technical and physical prowess, they made up in sheer numbers. We were overrun within six months.
The Governors of The Escapist tried to appease the rising masses, devoting more time to their Motion-sensing, graphically limited god. Even allowing the annexing of the Unforgotten Realms, the last bastion of those pilgrims who risked their very lives travelling across the land in search of true Gamedom. But still these Casual warriors strove to bend the entire Escapist to their every whim. Even with the Casuals becoming the greatest of the four tribes, they sought to turn the other three into mere shadows of their former selves, their items of worship made to resemble the Casual god.
However, all is not lost. Much of the Hardcore tribes have fled into the areas of the Escapist Casuals dare not go. Politics and Religion, User Reviews, and Gaming discussion. Slowly they prepare for the coming war.
Core Tribes:
The Casual Gamers: Until the insurgency, the Casuals were by far the least organised and least militaristic of the Four great tribes, Choosing instead to dedicate themselves to decadence and hedonism. The least powerful of the tribes, the Casuals however have developed an awesome weapon. Completely modular, with attachments ranging from melee weapons to long-range projectile throwers, this has proven the edge needed by the Casuals, against the much more traditionalistic weapons of the rest of The Escapist's many factions. Also to their advantage is sheer numbers, with near double the warriors of the next-biggest tribe...
The Clan of the Xbox: Once abundant, during the initial takeover by the Casual Gamers, many of the Xbox clansmen were lost to the lures of the Casual, agreeing most readily to the terms laid down by the conquering Casuals. Those that remain true to the Hardcore, however, still possess the high-pitched voices, sheer technical skill and brick-headed determination they are renowned for. Never known to give up without a fight, the Xbox clansmen are great warriors, stopping at nothing to attain victory.
The Playstation tribe: Generations ago, this tribe were the most powerful and undisputed of the four tribes within the land. Sadly, as the years have passed, their numbers have dwindled as other more prominent clans have risen to power. Although relatively small in number, the Tribes people of Playstation are by far the largest and most powerful of the various Clans, with a staunch dedication to the Hardcore.
And finally, The PC Dynasty: The most widely varying of the tribes. With physical appearance, power, intelligence, and temperament varying wildly from tribesman to tribesman, the PC Dynasty still have their feet firmly planted in the Hardcore. Dynasty are revered amongst all people within The Escapist. Known for their fearsome accuracy using the weapon of their choice - Mouse and Keyboard - they are still atoning for their hand in the formation of the Casuals, dabbling as they did in the black arts of Flash and Java.
While they fight for the same cause, there is much tension between the tribes. No two are fully prepared to declare themselves anything more than 'Allies'. Especially obvious are the tensions that rise over the preferred weapons of the tribes, with a major rift between those that favour the heavy-handed yet versatile wireless analogue-sticks-and-buttons, and those that would prefer the overly-delicate yet more precise Keyboard-and-mouse. No tribe will ever truly be at peace, with the ever-looming threat of the Casuals, and the silent fear of those whom they fight alongside.
But it is not only the Hardcore tribes that join this allegiance to rid the casual scourge. Other peoples within The Escapist remain staunchly independent, and fight for their honour alone
Secondary Clans
The Kingdom of Crowshaw has thus far managed to keep the Casual army at bay. Their King rules with an Iron Fist, and deals swift and harsh justice to anyone or anything that may dare to stray outside the strict guidelines and laws that have passed under his cruel and bitter hand. Better known for diplomacy and verbosity rather than skills in battle, the people of Crowshaw nevertheless are fully prepared to lay down their lives in protection of their King, whom often regards his many subjects with annoyed surprise.
The Monks of the Unforgotten Realm, once peaceful and welcoming to those who risk the journey to their gaming Mecca, chose to escape underground, away from the tyrannical new rule of the Casual puppet council. Betrayed by The Escapist government, they choose to fight for themselves, ruled as they now are by the Game Dogs of War. Already they attack and retreat frequently, never allowing The Escapist's government or their Casual handlers to forget the name of the once great city that they cruelly snuffed the life from. Perfectly trained in the art of Pacifistic and Psychological warfare, the Monks abhor violence in all it's forms, choosing rather to undermine enemies' confidence and grip on reality
All over the land, those Moderators who did not follow their government into submission remain to take care of the land. However, their methods are ham-fisted and dangerous. Choosing to outright banish and clear-cut entire areas of the Escapist at the first sign of upheaval - they side with neither the Casual oppressors or the Hardcore rebels, they exist only to save their beloved home from the flames that may soon consume it. Immensely powerful, many moderators have become corrupted by the power within, and laid waste to vast areas of The Escapist.
Inside their great and pixellated longhouse, reside the most Ancient Order of The Eight. Born of a time when all gaming was hardcore, and only the toughest survived to see world 5-1, these old and weathered veterans of the Console Wars are the source of all Gaming Wisdom throughout The Escapist. The Ancient Order have remained neutral throughout the Civil War, having seen the best and worst of themselves in both sides. Preferring older and more outdated technology, the Order are still a force to be reckoned with, with their knowledge of gaming unsurpassed by anyone in the Escapist. They also are the sworn protectors of the Code of Konami, an unbelievably powerful spell that has the power to change the world, often for the good, often for the bad.
Finally there rises another force, one that threatens all factions, and may come to destroy The Escapist itself. Without the controlling hand of the great tribes, and The Escapist government, the Horde of Forum Trolls has once again risen out of relative obscurity to take over all parts of The Escapist. Although very unintelligent, and prone to bouts of near catatonic stupidity, if left unchecked, they are poised to do untold damage to all, not caring for politics or allies, as they seek only to destroy for their own hedonistic pleasure...
The time of Civil war draws near, once again. Choose your side, find your allegiances!
Yes, I was bored, yes, I know it's stupid, and yes, I do hope you have as much fun battling this out in the comments as I had coming up with the most far-fetched things I could think of. Enjoy!
PS. Hey, if you can think of any great ideas for tribes and whatnot, feel free to elaborate!
PPS. Thanks to all the suggestions, I've added some more clans. Special thanks to Kimchi for giving me the basis of the Order of Eight.
