So I asked this girl out...

[MagentaMask]

Yesterday I swallowed as much of my nervousness I possibly could and asked a girl I fancy out for a cup of coffee. Her response was not cheerful or eager (which is, of course, the best response of any) but more reserved. She told me she didn't know when she'd have time and that she'd have to get back to me. I said that was cool, and we said goodbye.

Now... To me it just feels like I suprised her and she didn't know how to put me down gently, so she kinda "stalled". I might of course be wrong, but at the moment I am overanalyzing, worrying and biting my fingernails down to bloodied stumps.

I apologize to you who thought this thread was going to have a point... I just needed a way to release some steam at 5 in the morning. Monotoring this thread for any morsel of insight might also keep me occupied until I can tell for sure about her sincerity.

*tips imaginary hat*

 

[Lilani]

Yikes. I don't want to be the bearer of bad news, but most likely that is her saying "No." Our kind are sometimes cruel like that...out of a desire to be gentle and not crush the guy as he stands at our feet, we avoid the question and hope he goes away. I could be wrong, but I wouldn't set my hopes too high if I were you. I would recommend checking back in after a few days, and if she gives you the same answer just ask her straight out if she feels the same, and tell her if she doesn't then that's okay. Even if you're lying and you aren't alright, that should at least be enough to get a straight answer out of her.

Good luck, though. I wish I could bag myself a nice Brit :< (well, I'm assuming you're a Brit given the way you said fancy instead like, and it's 5 AM instead of 10 PM).

 

[MagentaMask]

:/

Well yeah, that does seem likely. It's not that I blame her in any way (although some frankness -would- be refreshing), and I can handle rejection, it's just the uncertainty that's killing me.

 

[burningdragoon]

Yeah.... sounds like it being a gentle no is the safest bet. Which sucks of course, but hey, it's not all bad. Let's focus on the good part:

I swallowed as much of my nervousness I possibly could and asked a girl I fancy out

See that? You did it. You know what that means? It means you are a fucking rockstar.

 

[Vegosiux]

Sounds like a "no" to me. Could be wrong, of course, but, right now it is as it is. You went there, you asked, pat yourself on the back, get back to what you're doing and see what life brings your way.

 

[J. Mazarin]

Sounds like a "no". Make sure it's a "no" first, and then see if there's anyone else around you like.

Hey, hardest part's getting over that initial hill. Should be (relatively) smooth sailing from here.

 

[MagentaMask]

See that? You did it. You know what that means? It means you are a fucking rockstar.

Hah

Thanks for the replies, 'tis time to get to work now though. Have a good one!

 

[Substitute Troll]

Yesterday I swallowed as much of my nervousness I possibly could and asked a girl I fancy out for a cup of coffee. Her response was not cheerful or eager (which is, of course, the best response of any) but more reserved. She told me she didn't know when she'd have time and that she'd have to get back to me. I said that was cool, and we said goodbye.

Now... To me it just feels like I suprised her and she didn't know how to put me down gently, so she kinda "stalled". I might of course be wrong, but at the moment I am overanalyzing, worrying and biting my fingernails down to bloodied stumps.

I apologize to you who thought this thread was going to have a point... I just needed a way to release some steam at 5 in the morning. Monotoring this thread for any morsel of insight might also keep me occupied until I can tell for sure about her sincerity.

*tips imaginary hat*

That would be a "no" most propably. I don't see what the big deal is though. Find a new specimen, ask that out.

 

[Smooth Operator]

Ya, get used to the fact that this is the closest thing to a NO women will ever give you.

However you broke the ice many guys get stuck on, it was highly unlikely you will catch your balance first time on a bike but making the decision to start learning is the most important one, now just stick with it and hone your skill.
That girl might have said no to the bumbling buffoon you are now but down the line all that may change, just takes dedication to get there.

Captcha: that's enough, party pooper

 

[science girl]

:/

Well yeah, that does seem likely. It's not that I blame her in any way (although some frankness -would- be refreshing), and I can handle rejection, it's just the uncertainty that's killing me.

Plenty more fish in the sea. Such a cliche but true all the same

 

[dimensional]

Yesterday I swallowed as much of my nervousness I possibly could and asked a girl I fancy out for a cup of coffee. Her response was not cheerful or eager (which is, of course, the best response of any) but more reserved. She told me she didn't know when she'd have time and that she'd have to get back to me. I said that was cool, and we said goodbye.

Now... To me it just feels like I suprised her and she didn't know how to put me down gently, so she kinda "stalled". I might of course be wrong, but at the moment I am overanalyzing, worrying and biting my fingernails down to bloodied stumps.

I apologize to you who thought this thread was going to have a point... I just needed a way to release some steam at 5 in the morning. Monotoring this thread for any morsel of insight might also keep me occupied until I can tell for sure about her sincerity.

*tips imaginary hat*

Id recommend doing the same as me expecting the worst hope for the best, my situations a little different though we were at a wedding party got chatting found we had pretty similar interests and then we danced during the night for quite a bit when I wasnt mingling (I was best man so had duties, also she was chief bridesmaid) I didnt put any moves on her though (I dont do that anymore it makes things uncomfortable). I asked for her number at the end of the night and she said I dont have it on me so I just thought oh yeah thats a no then oh well nothing ventured nothing gained.

So I thought ah well cant blame her may as well have a good night and a few more dances before shes off then but I think I must have looked a bit sceptical because she assured me she had actually lost her phone (and the bride told me the same in the morning not sure how she found out she must have been told by the girl) so I was left unsure then also after she left the groom came up and told me she had said to him that she liked me, so now I was really unsure.

Anyway next morning we got talking again and getting along great just as she said she was going a small silence came between us and we stood there so I thought ah sod it and flat out asked her if she would like to keep in touch she said yes and to add her on facebook I said I would (and now have and she has accepted) but I am not usually on facebook (also its facebook how many friends are actual friends on it) and told her so she asked for my number and I gave it her.

She is at uni this week and then off to China for 3 weeks so I dont expect to hear from her for a while but I think I will send her a message to ask her if she wants to meet up in a few weeks (after she has returned and settled back in) and see if she says yes ,no or ignores me (no without the words) and then leave it at that. Hope I do see her again though she was a lovely girl in every way.

 

[RavingLibDem]

Yesterday I swallowed as much of my nervousness I possibly could and asked a girl I fancy out for a cup of coffee. Her response was not cheerful or eager (which is, of course, the best response of any) but more reserved. She told me she didn't know when she'd have time and that she'd have to get back to me. I said that was cool, and we said goodbye.

Now... To me it just feels like I suprised her and she didn't know how to put me down gently, so she kinda "stalled". I might of course be wrong, but at the moment I am overanalyzing, worrying and biting my fingernails down to bloodied stumps.

I apologize to you who thought this thread was going to have a point... I just needed a way to release some steam at 5 in the morning. Monotoring this thread for any morsel of insight might also keep me occupied until I can tell for sure about her sincerity.

*tips imaginary hat*

Id recommend doing the same as me expecting the worst hope for the best, my situations a little different though we were at a wedding party got chatting found we had pretty similar interests and then we danced during the night for quite a bit when I wasnt mingling (I was best man so had duties, also she was chief bridesmaid) I didnt put any moves on her though (I dont do that anymore it makes things uncomfortable). I asked for her number at the end of the night and she said I dont have it on me so I just thought oh yeah thats a no then oh well nothing ventured nothing gained.

So I thought ah well cant blame her may as well have a good night and a few more dances before shes off then but I think I must have looked a bit sceptical because she assured me she had actually lost her phone (and the bride told me the same in the morning not sure how she found out she must have been told by the girl) so I was left unsure then also after she left the groom came up and told me she had said to him that she liked me, so now I was really unsure.

Anyway next morning we got talking again and getting along great just as she said she was going a small silence came between us and we stood there so I thought ah sod it and flat out asked her if she would like to keep in touch she said yes and to add her on facebook I said I would (and now have and she has accepted) but I am not usually on facebook (also its facebook how many friends are actual friends on it) and told her so she asked for my number and I gave it her.

She is at uni this week and then off to China for 3 weeks so I dont expect to hear from her for a while but I think I will send her a message to ask her if she wants to meet up in a few weeks (after she has returned and settled back in) and see if she says yes ,no or ignores me (no without the words) and then leave it at that. Hope I do see her again though she was a lovely girl in every way.

Dude, trust your original instinct, she likes you, or at least fancied the hell out of you that night! I'm sure it'll work out well for you

On Topic: It hurts when you think a girl doesn't like you, but in my experience if they don't find a way of meeting up with you, then they aren't that keen... Still, good luck, either with this girl or the next!

 

[dimensional]

*snip*

Dude, trust your original instinct, she likes you, or at least fancied the hell out of you that night! I'm sure it'll work out well for you

On Topic: It hurts when you think a girl doesn't like you, but in my experience if they don't find a way of meeting up with you, then they aren't that keen... Still, good luck, either with this girl or the next!

haha cheers will see what happens though. I dont want to force anything on her so ill just leave the ball in her court so to speak.

 

[Total LOLige]

I say try again in a week or two. If it is a no again just listen to some R.E.M because "everybody hurts sometimes." It won't be long before you find somebody else.

 

[Mavriked]

Girls are strange creatures. We as men are raised to believe they would favor a chivalrous knight, but in reality the opposite is true. They want the guy that won't let them cross the bridge in the badass black armor no matter what they do. It is probably too late for this girl, but i like to start my relationships with a invitation similar to me and some buddies are going out for some drinks and you can tag along. This makes it so they will feel more comfortable knowing that it won't just be you and them and to top it off it is almost like they are an afterthought. After the door has been opened and they are interested in you than you can be the white knight that you want to be.

Basically, make it so it seems like you don't care if they like you or not and they will like you. Still not sure why this is, it also works for girls when trying to get a guy. If you don't believe me, try it.

 

[artanis_neravar]

Yesterday I swallowed as much of my nervousness I possibly could and asked a girl I fancy out for a cup of coffee. Her response was not cheerful or eager (which is, of course, the best response of any) but more reserved. She told me she didn't know when she'd have time and that she'd have to get back to me. I said that was cool, and we said goodbye.

Now... To me it just feels like I suprised her and she didn't know how to put me down gently, so she kinda "stalled". I might of course be wrong, but at the moment I am overanalyzing, worrying and biting my fingernails down to bloodied stumps.

I apologize to you who thought this thread was going to have a point... I just needed a way to release some steam at 5 in the morning. Monotoring this thread for any morsel of insight might also keep me occupied until I can tell for sure about her sincerity.

*tips imaginary hat*

Id recommend doing the same as me expecting the worst hope for the best, my situations a little different though we were at a wedding party got chatting found we had pretty similar interests and then we danced during the night for quite a bit when I wasnt mingling (I was best man so had duties, also she was chief bridesmaid) I didnt put any moves on her though (I dont do that anymore it makes things uncomfortable). I asked for her number at the end of the night and she said I dont have it on me so I just thought oh yeah thats a no then oh well nothing ventured nothing gained.

So I thought ah well cant blame her may as well have a good night and a few more dances before shes off then but I think I must have looked a bit sceptical because she assured me she had actually lost her phone (and the bride told me the same in the morning not sure how she found out she must have been told by the girl) so I was left unsure then also after she left the groom came up and told me she had said to him that she liked me, so now I was really unsure.

Anyway next morning we got talking again and getting along great just as she said she was going a small silence came between us and we stood there so I thought ah sod it and flat out asked her if she would like to keep in touch she said yes and to add her on facebook I said I would (and now have and she has accepted) but I am not usually on facebook (also its facebook how many friends are actual friends on it) and told her so she asked for my number and I gave it her.

She is at uni this week and then off to China for 3 weeks so I dont expect to hear from her for a while but I think I will send her a message to ask her if she wants to meet up in a few weeks (after she has returned and settled back in) and see if she says yes ,no or ignores me (no without the words) and then leave it at that. Hope I do see her again though she was a lovely girl in every way.

I'm going to agree with the other guy and say that she was (is)into you. Oddly enough I am in a similar (but not exactly the same) situation

Yesterday I swallowed as much of my nervousness I possibly could and asked a girl I fancy out for a cup of coffee. Her response was not cheerful or eager (which is, of course, the best response of any) but more reserved. She told me she didn't know when she'd have time and that she'd have to get back to me. I said that was cool, and we said goodbye.

Now... To me it just feels like I suprised her and she didn't know how to put me down gently, so she kinda "stalled". I might of course be wrong, but at the moment I am overanalyzing, worrying and biting my fingernails down to bloodied stumps.

I apologize to you who thought this thread was going to have a point... I just needed a way to release some steam at 5 in the morning. Monotoring this thread for any morsel of insight might also keep me occupied until I can tell for sure about her sincerity.

*tips imaginary hat*

It is probably a no, but just ask her if it was a no, it should help clear things up.

Captcha: Puppy Love
well played captcha

 

[Powereaver]

Asking women out is a weird experience lol.. the last girl i asked out seemed REALLY eager to go out.. i even got an immediate "SURE" to my response.. but then when i msged her later in the day.. i found out she wasnt even single and barely msged me since lol... darn confusing creatures.

 

[Reyold]

*reads thread title* This can't end well.

Anyway, congrats on actually asking her out. I had the hardest time just making myself SIT near the girl I liked. I tried to get her to meet with me (didn't even ask her out), but that... didn't work out so great.

 

[Goofguy]

If this doesn't work out and she doesn't get back to you, at least you made the move. What you'll take away is the confidence to try it again next time when you meet an other woman you like. You've learned that despite your shyness, it is NOT the end of the world to ask someone out.

Bravo Zulu, buddy.

 

[The Unworthy Gentleman]

Nicely done. You put your fear and anxiety aside and asked her out, regardless of the answer you came out with that gain in confidence. Don't get your hopes up, but she still hasn't given you her answer. Even if she is stalling she can still say yes, jumping to conclusions isn't going to help anyone, try not to over think like you are right now.

Quick sidebar: For months when SOLVEmedia asks me to describe a brand I've been writing the word 'shit' in the box, simply because I can. The day has finally come that Chipotle must be described, I think you can all see where I'm going with this. Thank you internet and good luck OP.