So, I'm having a bit of a downer right now.

[Simalacrum]

Simple really, my grandfather passed away a few days ago. He had a severe stroke a week or so back, then passed away in his sleep in hospital.

While I understand that such an occurrence is not only something to be expected over the course of my life, but something that is right, as part of the natural cycle of life, its still rather sad to lose both my grandparents in the course of a year (my grandmother also died of a stroke just over a year or so ago).

So? yeah. I was wandering if people here knew any good ways of cheering oneself up? Activities to keep my mind off things and whatnot.

Thanks for any advice anyone can give.

 

[CulixCupric]

Ah, my grandfather died a year ago from cancer, we spend the week in remembrance with all of the extended family, thinking upon the good times we had with him. We still think of him often.

 

[JesterRaiin]

So? yeah. I was wandering if people here knew any good ways of cheering oneself up? Activities to keep my mind off things and whatnot.

Thanks for any advice anyone can give.

- Usually it's best to "waste" some times on activities like cleaning your room/home/house, organizing files into libraries, managing bookmarks and such.
- Starting some project is hard, but it brings peace of mind. I recommend expression - writing, composing some music, making photos (and webgallery).
- Maybe it's perfect time to read some gaming theory ? I mean, maybe you're into rpgs, boardgames, chess ?

 

[gorfias]

Maybe start a project to share with family that honors the memory of your grandparents and celebrates how they lived. Do you own sound, video and photo editing software? Have pictures of your grandparents? Access to music from their youth or favorite songs you listened to?

There are websites where you can look up things like the cover of magazines that came out the week someone was born, or what song was #1 nationally on their birthday, etc.

My kids bought "Somewhere Over The Rainbow" by that Hawain singer that they enjoyed listening to with their grandmother. They blasted it out over a boom box at her burial.

 

[dcaseyjones]

Grief is never easy to deal with, dude. It sounds like you have the right angle on the issue, that it's part of life, that there's nothing you can do about it, but there's one bit of advice my Mom gave me shortly before she passed that has helped me a lot.

I told her I'd miss her, and she smiled and said "You'll be all right. And there'll be days where you won't be. And that's fine."

You don't need to bounce back from someone's death right away. There's no set pace to how fast you should get over it, so just take it at your own speed, as long as you don't let it consume you entirely. Do some soul-searching, take a walk around town for an afternoon, and really take your time to let the answer come to you. I used to love taking the bus downtown in the summer to watch the businessmen and bums play chess against each other every day at lunch. I don't know why, but I did my best thinking after watching that for an hour or so.

I know the advice sounds vague and kind of crappy, but it's the best answer I came up with. I dealt with my loss 7-some years ago, and I'm in pretty decent shape about it now. All the best to you and your struggle. "You'll be all right."

 

[Angie7F]

I think you dont need to hurry and bounce back right away.
The amount of grief you are going through probably shows how much you cared about them.
Take your time, because fast forwarding things like this wont do you any good either.

All my grandparents have passed, and my father passed about two years ago.
Unfortunately I did not have the time to grieve at all when any of them died because I had businesses to keep together and what not.
I dont know if its because of that, but I dont have any memory of what I have been doing in the past 2 years or around the time when my grandparents died/.
In a way its good because I dont have to remember unpleasant things, but I also feel scared that I am missing out on a lot of things/ not remembering a lot of things.
Huge chunks of my life is missing, and its not a great feeling at all.

If you are able the time to think about them and really reflect n what you are going through, by all means do so and make it a part of your life experiences. It will enrich you as a person and only make you stronger.

 

[Erana]

Have a happy totem. Some sort of trinket or something that reminds you of the unabashedly happy.
Not as a security blanket or anything, just something that you can use to remind you of the possible depth of happiness, and even just to be happy. Maybe a little keychain of an apple that reminds you of a special picnic place, or a sticker on your wallet of a favorite character from childhood. Even a catchy tune can suffice as long as you don't mind repetition.

For me, remembering joy is what makes me able to see bad things from a different perspective. It doesn't make grief go away, but it can remind you of why its worth feeling.

 

[BigFish]

I am so sorry for your loss.My grandfather passed a couple of years ago and it broke my heart. We would always go fishing together and watch old gangster movies! All I can tell you is that your grandfather and grandmother are both a source of happiness in your life. Remember the good times and the way they lived and loved. Remember things like old gangster movies or adventures that weren't even really adventures.

Maybe you should take a trip or go on an "adventure" that you would have liked to taken with your grandparents. One to take your mind off things and help you cope as well.