SON!! I broke the computer!!

[Eri]

Inspired by many things, among my parents as one of them, I decided to make this thread. Being the "expert" on computers in the family, pretty much anything that happens I get barked at for help. So I thought it would make a great thread to say some "annoying/dumb" things your parents or whomever, do with computers.

Always double clicks internet links. Always

"Hey can I borrow your computer for a second?"
Sure. *I open a new tab* (Several others are open)
*10 minutes pass*
"Okay, I'm done. I exited out for you"
.........

"I can just use my own wireless internet" "..why isn't it working?"
Because your house is 10 miles away?
"Doesn't wireless mean everywhere?"
/facepalm

Also claiming firefox was too hard to use and IE was faster and easier.

 

[The Maddest March Hare]

I think the best story like this I've ever heard was on 4chan. The guy deleted IE for Firefox, then his mother came to use the computer and couldn't find the IE symbol. After shouting at him for a while she claimed he had "deleted the internet". He carried on trying to explain the Firefox was the same and she could still use the internet, but she wouldn't listen, then phoned the ISP to explain her son had deleted the internet and needed help.

Since it's 4chan, I don't take it entirely at face value, but it's not unbelievable. And it's incredibly funny. "Deleted the internet" is my new favourite phrase.

 

[RaphaelsRedemption]

I got told I was the worst sort of person to help with computers, as I could not wait for things to load and would always refresh, grumble, eventually close all tabs and leave.

This was by my boyfriend. In defense, I was coming from dial-up and a connection where 50% of all sites would crash my browser. But I was still an impatient idiot.

 

[Claptrap]

My sister cant install games on her computer, She loves to play them but i tryed to explain how to install and them and she just doesnt get it, So whenever she gets a new game i get shouted at to install it

 

[Hlain]

When my mom is borrowing the computer to check some website, she types with only her index fingers. And it goes slooow. Always makes me cringe.

 

[Outright Villainy]

When my mom is borrowing the computer to check some website, she types with only her index fingers. And it goes slooow. Always makes me cringe.

I know a few people (my girlfriend included), who type English essays like that.
They never taught typing in school...

 

[PurpleLeafRave]

My sister installed "Smiley Central" or something like that, where you get free "smiley's".
Needless to say, we got tonnes of viruses on our computer, and I got the blame because I use it the most.

Who does that?

Managed to get rid of the viruses, but if I hadn't, I would have had to pay for a new computer. Even though I told them countless times it was my sisters fault. [/rage]

 

[Carboncrown]

I think the best story like this I've ever heard was on 4chan. The guy deleted IE for Firefox, then his mother came to use the computer and couldn't find the IE symbol. After shouting at him for a while she claimed he had "deleted the internet". He carried on trying to explain the Firefox was the same and she could still use the internet, but she wouldn't listen, then phoned the ISP to explain her son had deleted the internet and needed help.

Since it's 4chan, I don't take it entirely at face value, but it's not unbelievable. And it's incredibly funny. "Deleted the internet" is my new favourite phrase.

I should try that, my dad always complains about that when using my computer. "No, I wan't to get to the normal internet."

And double clics liks, of course.

 

[CakeDragon]

The family computer at home *somehow* got Trojan Horse-d, so when I went to check it (background moment, I live in university halls and have my own PC so I did this when I went home one time) I couldn't open Firefox so I opened IE - holy cow there were more toolbars than there was window. I confronted my brother (as my parents wouldn't be able to do that) and he said (obviously) that those toolbars couldn't have downloaded any viruses, and neither could his Runescape bot... And worse of all, he'd turned off the anti-virus software..!

So they get the PC fixed, the tech guys gave them Vista (gutted) and the first thing my brother does is re-download his bot. Good lord my brother is thick. He thinks he knows better than me, a freakin' Computer Scientist.


The best thing my friend does is take a scren-shot of her desktop, set it as her wallpaper and delete all the icons - so when her parents go to click on what they think is an icon it doesn't work. Never gets old.

 

[Eri]

My sister installed "Smiley Central" or something like that, where you get free "smiley's".
Needless to say, we got tonnes of viruses on our computer, and I got the blame because I use it the most.

Who does that?

Managed to get rid of the viruses, but if I hadn't, I would have had to pay for a new computer. Even though I told them countless times it was my sisters fault. [/rage]

If there's one thing I've learned, it is that the girl NEVER gets blamed for the computer fucking up. It is always "but it did it itself!" or "Well I didnt do it". Well considering I'm not a complete retard, I'm pretty sure you did. If I sound a bit bitter, it's due to my sister doing this.

 

[DSK-]

I got told I was the worst sort of person to help with computers, as I could not wait for things to load and would always refresh, grumble, eventually close all tabs and leave.

This was by my boyfriend. In defense, I was coming from dial-up and a connection where 50% of all sites would crash my browser. But I was still an impatient idiot.

I'm like that with a broadband connection! really impatient, with in 5 seconds of waiting for something to load I get bored, frustrated and angry really quickly :/

OT: When something happens to the family computer I always try to help out and make suggestions. However, 90% of the time those suggestions aren't followed so I walk away, because there's nothing else I can really do besides watch/get bored watching/see above text.
Then I get moaned/shouted at because I walked away and aren't helping.

To be fair I have competent parents who can deal with most things, my mum particularly surprises me despite being scared of the computer.

The funniest story (at least to me) was at work, and one of my co-workers (as a cleaner) asked me if the information on the computer would be deleted if she turned off the monitor. I must admit I laughed hard after that, unfortunately.

 

[Claptrap]

The best thing my friend does is take a scren-shot of her desktop, set it as her wallpaper and delete all the icons - so when her parents go to click on what they think is an icon it doesn't work. Never gets old.

Haha, Wow that sounds really funny i'll have to try it sometime

 

[Ze_Reaper_Of_Zeath]

The family computer at home *somehow* got Trojan Horse-d, so when I went to check it (background moment, I live in university halls and have my own PC so I did this when I went home one time) I couldn't open Firefox so I opened IE - holy cow there were more toolbars than there was window. I confronted my brother (as my parents wouldn't be able to do that) and he said (obviously) that those toolbars couldn't have downloaded any viruses, and neither could his Runescape bot... And worse of all, he'd turned off the anti-virus software..!

So they get the PC fixed, the tech guys gave them Vista (gutted) and the first thing my brother does is re-download his bot. Good lord my brother is thick. He thinks he knows better than me, a freakin' Computer Scientist.


The best thing my friend does is take a scren-shot of her desktop, set it as her wallpaper and delete all the icons - so when her parents go to click on what they think is an icon it doesn't work. Never gets old.

Lulz, the trick your friend does, and I also do it. It messes them up, they come scream at me "WHAT HAVE YOU DONE? HUH? HUH?" lulz, I got punished for 2 days, but the reaction on their faces was priceless. I also do it to my I.T teacher; he couldn't figure it out for 10 minutes. Until somebody tattletaled on me, and he made me fixed.

 

[mr-fix_it]

The family computer at home *somehow* got Trojan Horse-d, so when I went to check it (background moment, I live in university halls and have my own PC so I did this when I went home one time) I couldn't open Firefox so I opened IE - holy cow there were more toolbars than there was window. I confronted my brother (as my parents wouldn't be able to do that) and he said (obviously) that those toolbars couldn't have downloaded any viruses, and neither could his Runescape bot... And worse of all, he'd turned off the anti-virus software..!

So they get the PC fixed, the tech guys gave them Vista (gutted) and the first thing my brother does is re-download his bot. Good lord my brother is thick. He thinks he knows better than me, a freakin' Computer Scientist.


The best thing my friend does is take a scren-shot of her desktop, set it as her wallpaper and delete all the icons - so when her parents go to click on what they think is an icon it doesn't work. Never gets old.

you that if you turn of the explorer process (useing ctrl+alt+delete) you get the same effect right?

OT my mother once asked me to fix the sound on the computer when all there was was that the speakers power cord had been pulled out. >.>

 

[rabidmidget]

As soon as I read the title, I was reminded of this:

Spoiler

OT: I don't have to deal with these kind of problems very much because my dad is pretty tech literate, my Mother and Sister on the other hand...

When I went to Japan for a week, they had no internet for most of the week because they didn't know how to restart the router.

 

[ThePostalGamer]

I've been using computers since I was around eight years old and I'm self-taught along with assistance from friends who are far more computer-savvy than myself. My father cannot use computers to save his life and it has frequently started arguments.

There was one instance where he was looking for an address for a place we had to go to later in the week. For me, standard procedure is Google the name and look for the nearest building on maps, which takes a few minutes tops. For whatever reason, he said "let me do it" and kicked me off the computer and proceeded to spend the next half hour with him sitting dumbfounded on random links and shit that he clicked on around the official website.

I got fed up with it and went to look up the nearest address on my very old laptop. Just for a sense of comparison to my computer, my laptop is incapable of running Halo, Rise of Nations and Fable: TLC and the keyboard freezes every two seconds and doesn't let me register keystrokes. This happens every single time I use it and it makes using eBuddy (did I mention that it can't run MSN either?), watching YouTube videos and just about everything else nearly impossible.

It took me about ten minutes to get the map due to the constant freezing and processor being unable to handle my internet speeds or something and when I finally got the map on screen, he walks in with three sheets of paper in his hand and tells me he got it.

He also double clicks on every link on the Internet.

I understand that you're trying to learn how to use a computer due to you not growing up with them and needing them for work, but booting the only guy in your family who knows how to use it off every single time because you believe this "I am older therefore I am wiser" bullshit just pisses me off to the point where I want to smash the computer to pieces with a brick so that you have to suffer with my shitty laptop.

/rant

 

[SpikeyGirl]

My little brother always ends up with computer viruses because he's an idiot. Most of my family are computer savvy, some more than others.
Though my little brother is a bit naive with many things, years ago in a game, my older brother told him to press ctrl-a and then ctrl-d (select all, destroy) telling my brother it would end the game faster.
Well it did.

 

[_tinned_magpie_]

Despite having two brothers who use computers as much as I do, I'm always the one who ends up fixing theirs when they break. Lately our wireless started malfunctioning and both of their computers refused to connect to the internet. It turned out that there had been a bit of a glitch with the WEP key (EDIT: correction, it was WPA2. Thanks Jiraiya72), and changing the wireless settings on both their computers was all that was needed. However, although one of my brothers was willing and grateful for me to fix it for him, the other blew his stack, accused me of causing the problem in the first place and refused to let me fix his because "I'd done enough damage already." All this said moments after I'd discovered the problem, fixed one computer, explained the ins and outs to him and offered to help him as well.

It took him two weeks to figure out how to fix it on his own. Idiot.

 

[Kukakkau]

Second I saw this topic I knew the feeling instantly. This first one was three days ago:

"Error must confirm your password"
Dad: "I FUCKING HATE COMPUTERS!! I DID TYPE MY PASSWORD!! SCOTT WHAT'S WRONG"
Me: "Did you type your password in again to confirm it?"
Dad: "What where do you do that?!"
Me: "...right underneath where you typed the password first time, where it says confirm password. "
Dad: "I've never had to do that before is it new??"
*walked away in shame*

I reformated my sister's laptop because she managed to mess it up and first thing I said to her was to install anti-virus software and don't use the internet till she had. Two days later "It's filled with viruses already!!" "...Did you install anti virus like I said or did you just look up episodes of Hollyoaks?" "...Was I meant to?"

Better was when I said to my parents "don't do anything with the virus filled computer I will deal with it when I get back in a few hours". My mum bought an unknown anti-virus software because "the screen told her to". It was fake, cost her £45 and brought even more viruses which they refused to let me reformat to remove them all (there was close to 100 different trojans and viruses on that thing) because they didn't want to trust a backup, they'd rather just deal with the computer which had >80% of it's memory used up at all times (it wasn't a great computer)

It gets to the stage now where if a problem doesn't interest me or is caused by their stupidity I just refuse to do anything about it.