Things you did that still make you cringe

[funkyjiveturkey]

what are some of your cringeworthy stories? most of mine come from grades 4-10

> 9th grade, my greasy awkward period
> girl in my class i have a crush on.
> kinda stuck up, know nothing about her.
> one day she winks and smiles at me in class.
> i fucking LOOK AROUND to make sure she's winking at me. ended up not thinking much of it because i was retarded.
> one day in the cafeteria i was sitting alone listening to music and eating food.
> after about 5 minutes of sitting there i get up to leave.
> walk by her table, in the corner of my eye i see her get up to say something to me. headphones still in, have no fucking idea what she said, keep walking.
> walk to the end of cafeteria by the vending machines, trying to wonder what she said to me or if she knew i couldn't hear her.
> hang around that general area doing nothing for another 5 minutes, hoping she'll come up to me.
> nothing, see her and her friends snickering.
> end of the year she called me a creep and a future pedophile.
> my face

 

[SadakoMoose]

1: This isn't 420chan, you don't have to tell tell stories using "less than" signs.
2: You poor man. Legitimately, I am sorry that happened to you and that your peers were so cruel. That's far from sociable or polite behavior on their part, and you should have demanded satisfaction for those barbs. Either way, don't let people like that get to you.
3: Looking back a my old Gaia online posts, re: my internet "girlfriend"...Oh god...What was wrong with 14 year old me?

 

[Shadowstar38]

A kid called me a fatass. So I took his dog when his family wasn't home and held him for ransom. Unfortunately, I signed my real name on the ransom note. 10 year olds don't think plans though very well I guess.

 

[lRookiel]

Lol'd at the ">"

One time as a child (9 or 10) I got dragged along to a bingo day at another school by my mother. Some of my friends were there and after being stuck playing bingo for a while we went outside where I noticed the school had alot of pampas grass

This stuff

Anyway, me being the childish idiot I decided we should rip it up and pretend they were spears. Looking back I pretty much cringe at the fact I destroyed another schools garden out of boredom.....

 

[funkyjiveturkey]

1: This isn't 420chan, you don't have to tell tell stories using "less than" signs.

gets the point across quicker.

2: You poor man. Legitimately, I am sorry that happened to you and that your peers were so cruel. That's far from sociable or polite behavior on their part, and you should have demanded satisfaction for those barbs. Either way, don't let people like that get to you.

huh? i never said it was anyone's fault, just a generally embarassing story

3: Looking back a my old Gaia online posts, re: my internet "girlfriend"...Oh god...What was wrong with 14 year old me?

this. i had the same situation and it happened on the same site. oh adolescence...

 

[cori]

Thankfully my mind is great at blanking out all of the embarrassing situations I've been in. However I do remember one scenario when I was in junior high (12 years old) and had a huuuugeeee crush on someone. I was shy and awkward so rather than approaching this person and trying to become friends with them, I observed him from the shadows and became a stalker almost. I made a dragonfable account soley for him, named and customised the character to how my crush at the time looked like. *cringe* (I also got an online cartoonist to draw my crush for me) BUT, It's okay because only a few of my friends know and it shall be a secret kept away from my crush for the rest of my life. P.s Don't be scared, I'd like to think I'm less obsessive and creepy these days

 

[San Martin]

How was I supposed to know that a joke about huge cocks and deep-throating would be innapropriate dinner talk at a pastor's house?

 

[Extra-Ordinary]

I don't know how relate-able this one is, it's more of a "me being harder on myself than I should have been" story but I'll tell it anyway.

High school rendition of West Side Story. I get Chino, I'm supposed to shoot Tony at the end. So, for whatever technical reason, we don't have like, a soundboard in our lighting booth or can get our hands on a prop gun so we deal with this toy gun with the orange tip scraped off and I'm supposed to synchronize the recoil with our drummer hitting, well, a drum. So,I go and tell him that to sync it up, I'll bring up the gun, cock it, then bring it down and fire. We practiced that for a while until we got it. But when it came time to actually put that plan into action, you know, DURING A SHOW, that's not what happened. I just fired. No sound. But wait, it gets better. What I should have done was play it off like the gun had jammed or something then just aim and fire again, would've been salvageable, right? That's not what I did. Instead, I look at the drummer like HE was the one who f****d up, and then I laugh, it's the first thing I do in a stressful situation, I laugh at myself. Then when the actress finally tries to salvage my train wreck by trying an improv line, I remember
"Wait, there's still a show, people are watching!"
Re-aim, fire, finish the show. And it had to be THIS showing that my parents came to. I cannot express in American English how much I hated myself for the rest of the night. I went home that night, still in costume, still wearing make-up, immediately found my cap-gun knowing that my director wouldn't let me use it (because she doesn't budge on any decision she makes, no matter how poor), found my dad's switchblade and literally found a corner to sit in and got to work trying to chip off the orange tip. It was by the fourth time my mom told me to shower and go to bed that I finally looked up and said
"this is a sad sight isn't it?"
Her response, a very blunt
"Yes."

[small]Showbusiness, here I come...[/small]

 

[SaetonChapelle]

what are some of your cringeworthy stories? most of mine come from grades 4-10

> 9th grade, my greasy awkward period

I thought this was a list at first. My assumption was "number 1: my greasy, awkward period". Like you were a female and one of your stories was about your menstrual cycle.

As for me, there is a list. My biggest was my female friend and I around 14 years old were wrestling. She herself looked more male then female (oh puberty, you cruel time). Turns out she was into females without my knowledge. We were rolling together and my father just so happened to walk in when she was straddling me and stole a kiss. Had to convince him for weeks that we weren't lesbians. T_T

 

[Headsprouter]

That's wierd...I'm having trouble remembering one...usually this is the kind of stuff I remember easily...

Well, I have a bit of an issue with the word acquaintance, it seems...hearing that word now makes me want to slap myself across the face.

I made an awkward comment on sausages to a dinner lady. I saw she felt uncomfortable that I was saying anything at all. I can't even remember what it was, but it was nothing overtly sexual, it was some sort of comment about them looking funny, and usually that can be seen as a dick joke.

GCSE art. 'Nuff said.

I may be back with more.

 

[deserteagleeye]

I was 8 years old. I was sucking a banana in the cafeteria because it was my own way of savoring food. Everyone was laughing at me and I had no idea why. When I got back home I asked my dad what was so funny about sucking a banana. Oh the look on his face.

 

[Eggsnham]

One time I was on the bus waiting to go home in like 10th grade and one of my friends who was sitting across from me started talking to a girl he knew. I didn't know her and was pretty much just half paying attention to the conversation, half looking out the window.

Eventually, my friend said something about the girl being single and jokingly suggested that she and I should go out sometime, I decided to play along and (jokingly) asked her out. I didn't really know her at the time and she didn't seem like the type of person I could easily get along with, so I made sure to go out of my way to avoid coming off as serious.

Her immediate reaction:

"Ew, no! You're disgusting!"

I suppose I was correct in my initial judgement that I wouldn't be able to get along with her. The worst part about the whole thing was that she wasn't exactly great looking herself. Not necessarily bad looking, mind you, but not good looking enough to justify her personality.

 

[NoeL]

1: This isn't 420chan, you don't have to tell tell stories using "less than" signs.

But he's using "greater than" signs, so it's totally allowed.

Hmm, cringe-worthy things... well, like anything my story is from when I was a dumb kid, maybe around 13 or 14. We were at a holiday park for a week or so - the time when you meet other kids you'll probably never see again and have short-term love affairs... well, that's what my older brother did - I was the shy type. One night one of the girls there kind of broke me away from the pack and I ended up back at her unit having a coffee with her. Rather than take advantage of the situation I ended up pouring out all my teenage insecurities: self esteem issues, trouble with bullies, etc. (what was I THINKING!?). The next night she hooked up with my brother instead, and I cried.

So glad I'm not that kid anymore! XD

 

[CardinalPiggles]

There's a brand of Tobacco called 'Golden Virginia' that my dad uses to smoke. One day I asked him what "Golden Vagina" meant, in front of half of my family.

"We'll tell you when you're older" they said. They never did.

 

[lechat]

How was I supposed to know that a joke about huge cocks and deep-throating would be innapropriate dinner talk at a pastor's house?

on a similar note to any 11 year olds out there. jokes about people accidentally having sex with penguins because they think they are nuns also not appropriate at highly religious people's houses

 

[Jack Joe Tip Toe]

When I was 7-8 years old I spent the night at a friends house for his birthday. We were going to play his Sega Saturn (Why he had a Saturn I'll never know) and turns out that my friends dog pissed all over the Saturn and it didn't work anymore. So he ran to his dad and begged him to get another one. It was late so his dad said no. He through a fit and wouldn't stop crying for like 20 minutes. I tell him that I'll go home and get my superior Playstation. He threw a piece of cake at me so I took it as a no. He finally stopped crying and said he had an idea. He ran upstairs and got some of the birthday money he had saved up. His "genius" plan was to go out at 10 at night and walk to Walmart to get a Sega Saturn. Me & my other friends that were there said it was a stupid idea, but he threatened to never let us in his house again if we didn't join him. He had a swimming pool, ping pong table, pinball machine, and a couple of arcade games so there was no way that I was going to get banned from this amazing place. He disabled the alarm and began our trip to Walmart. How far is Walmart? 6 miles away. So we had a long walk. In the middle of the walk I ask my friend exactly how much money he had. He said enough but I told him to let me see for myself. He had exactly 13 dollars and 50 cents. I want to tell him that isn't enough to buy a Saturn, but I would've gotten banned from his house. So I kept to myself. We make it to this field down a road and my friend says that he has to take a shit and we have to wait for him. He tells me to come with him and make sure nothing is around while he is shitting. It's about 11:30 now and I can't see shit, but I heard a strange noise. I heard a "SSSSSS" noise, but my dumb ass thought it was a cat hissing at us. Well I wish it was a cat. I see some rumbling through the grass and it's moving fast as hell. And as the thing got closer it finally hit me. A FUCKING SNAKE IS COMING! I yell to my friend that I saw a snake and he says I'm bullshitting him. About a second later the snake stands up and my friend runs as fast as he can with his pants down away from the snake. By the time I make it out the field my friend isn't even halfway out yet. I run back in to save him and when I make it to him I notice something, his pants and underwear are gone. We make it out the field and the snake is nowhere to be found. You think he would want to turn around and go back home, BUT NO. He wants to go to Walmart without any pants or any money. We walk for 5 more minutes until a car comes down the road. We ignore it but then the car stops. And a man gets out and we run like hell away from him. He gets in his car and starts to pursue us. And then hear my name being called and it sounded like a familiar voice. And I realized it was my dad. I stop and so do the rest of my friends and I could tell by the look in his eyes that he was pissed off. He told us all to get into the car and we did. He dropped everyone but me off at my friends house and he started to yell at me and scold me for being so stupid. He took me home and I was too tired to do anything else for the rest of the night but sleep. My dad woke me up and told me my friends left a stain in his car and it smelled like shit. And I remembered, my friend forgot to wipe his ass after he took a shit. I cleaned up the stain and I was grounded for the rest of the summer. And to this day my friend still thinks that the Sega Saturn is the greatest console ever.

 

[Amir Kondori]

1: This isn't 420chan, you don't have to tell tell stories using "less than" signs.
2: You poor man. Legitimately, I am sorry that happened to you and that your peers were so cruel. That's far from sociable or polite behavior on their part, and you should have demanded satisfaction for those barbs. Either way, don't let people like that get to you.
3: Looking back a my old Gaia online posts, re: my internet "girlfriend"...Oh god...What was wrong with 14 year old me?

Those are greater than signs.

 

[Voulan]

How was I supposed to know that a joke about huge cocks and deep-throating would be innapropriate dinner talk at a pastor's house?

If it helps, I did something similar. I was happily playing GTA: San Andreas in front of a priest that was visiting when I was 12. Definitely not the best choice of game to play in front of someone from the Catholic Church, but he didn't say anything.

I've embarrassed myself way too many times to mention here. I'm one of those people that remember all of those moments. I think it's best if I don't bring up those memories.

 

[Johnny Novgorod]

Meeting my girlfriend's parents for the first time over at dinner, and her little brother - 8 years - asks us when we'll be having kids of our own. SHUT IT TOMMY THIS ISN'T A SITCOM.