Unskippable: Call of Duty: Black Ops II

[Graham_LRR]

Call of Duty: Black Ops II

Paul and Graham take you into the game that takes you so deep into a flashback you won't know where, or when, you are.

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[Canadamus Prime]

I think this rivals Ace Combat 6 for most depressing intro you've ever done. Close second. As for the timeline, I couldn't even begin to guess.

 

[Thunderous Cacophony]

I once made a promise that I would never laugh at jokes about little girls burning to death. Today, I broke that promise.

 

[kailus13]

I think he was going to slit his own throat with that fairly blunt locket. Suicide aside, that's fairly badass.

Fire damage enough to burn all her hair off and make it obvious she has no chance, and she still sounds perfectly healthy.

I have no idea what's gijg on with the timeline. Were two different people having the same flashback? Was one character having the flashback from the perspective of a different character? I'm so confused.

 

[Mr. Q]

Sweet Jebus! Doctor Who didn't bounce around time and space as much as this intro did.

 

[Ne1butme]

I feel like not playing the first game greatly decreased my understanding of what i just saw.

 

[Mydnyght]

Damn, guys, you sure know how to make people like me laugh at something full of depressing and confusing shite. How do you...

Oh wait...

"Smell my pits!"
"Can YOU smell my pits?"
"Yes! Smell ours too!"

Well, mentioning stuff like pit-smelling really helps. ^_^

 

[hazydawn]

Funny like always. First time I'm commenting to any of your vids just wanted to say that I enjoy most of them :0

 

[ThatDarnCoyote]

I feel like not playing the first game greatly decreased my understanding of what i just saw.

I played the first game, and still found this opening bewildering when I first saw it.

 

[Bindal]

I think this rivals Ace Combat 6 for most depressing intro you've ever done. Close second. As for the timeline, I couldn't even begin to guess.

That's probably because they watched a TRAILER-INTRO first. The actual Intro starts with the "No Trespassing"-sign. The rest? Not important. In fact, not even part of the proper intro.

Blame those two guys making the video for purposly confusing you to make the game look worse.

Edit: Okay, if Paul and Graham are serious about the whole "please create a timeline"-thing at the end, here you go. (Times are those from your video)
Remember that this game has TWO timelines going parallel (80s and 2025, with 80s leading to 2025 but uncovering infos slowly. I will refer to each timeline seperate)

0:00 to 0:22 - YOUR INTRO, GUYS! Not that hard to get! (Yeah, I know that I didn't have to add it, but I wanted. Bite me.)
0:22 to 0:43 - Adds of developer and publisher.
0:43 to 1:05 - Flash forward in the 80s timeline to it's conclusion, voice-over from 3rd to last 2025-mission intro (not actually seen in-game, however).
1:05 to 1:15 - Flash forward in the 2025 timeline, continuing the previous voice-over. (19th July 2025, in fact)
1:15 to 1:26 - Jump back by 8 hours to the beginning of the previous 2025 mission.
1:26 to 1:58 - Flashback to 1973, showing how Raul Menendez (guy in orange, villain) sister got burned to near-death.
1:58 to 2:06 - Again to the "8 Hours Earlier"-scene
2:06 to 2:33 - '73-Flashback again
2:33 to 2:42 - "8 Hours earlier" again
2:42 to 2:51 - 1973
2:51 to 3:07 - "8 Hours earlier" again
-IMPORANT - NOW STARTS THE ACTUAL INTRO- Until now, you haven't even seen the mainmenu.
3:07 to 5:15 - 19th of April, 2025. "Present time" of the 2025 timeline. Few flashbacks to a previous point thrown in, details of that are told later in the game when more important
5:15 to 6:35 - 1982 (exact date unknown) "Present time" of the 80s timeline.
6:35 to end - Outro of this show, not imporatant.

Did that clear things up? Like that you watched something clearly not intended to be part of the actual intro?

I feel like not playing the first game greatly decreased my understanding of what i just saw.

Actually, playing the first game is not required unless you want the characters of the 80s to be introduced to you.

 

[Something Amyss]

Blame those two guys making the video for purposly confusing you to make the game look worse.

Are you accusing Graham and Paul of being teh bias?

 

[JaredXE]

That's probably because they watched a TRAILER-INTRO first. The actual Intro starts with the "No Trespassing"-sign. The rest? Not important. In fact, not even part of the proper intro.


Did that clear things up? Like that you watched something clearly not intended to be part of the actual intro?

Did it play when the game started? Is it the first thing a player sees? Then guess what, it's an intro.

Sorry to rag on something you're clearly getting upset over, but that opening was rather confusing with it's nested flashbacks and crap.

 

[Imp_Emissary]

I think he was going to slit his own throat with that fairly blunt locket. Suicide aside, that's fairly badass.

Fire damage enough to burn all her hair off and make it obvious she has no chance, and she still sounds perfectly healthy.

Burns all her hair, and all the skin we can see, but almost doesn't affect her dress. Must be a well made dress.

 

[Bindal]

That's probably because they watched a TRAILER-INTRO first. The actual Intro starts with the "No Trespassing"-sign. The rest? Not important. In fact, not even part of the proper intro.


Did that clear things up? Like that you watched something clearly not intended to be part of the actual intro?

Did it play when the game started? Is it the first thing a player sees? Then guess what, it's an intro.

Sorry to rag on something you're clearly getting upset over, but that opening was rather confusing with it's nested flashbacks and crap.

It is also the first thing the player sees if he doesn't play the campaign but the multiplayer (which it doesn't relate to in any case) or Zombies (which is relates to even less). So, no, it is NOT the intro.

 

[kailus13]

I think he was going to slit his own throat with that fairly blunt locket. Suicide aside, that's fairly badass.

Fire damage enough to burn all her hair off and make it obvious she has no chance, and she still sounds perfectly healthy.

Burns all her hair, and all the skin we can see, but almost doesn't affect her dress. Must be a well made dress.

I was looking up fire retardant materials to say something snarky along the lines of "must have been made out of kevlar " but it turns out that wool is fire retardant so it could have been made out of that. Takes the fun out of it a little bit.

 

[Eric the Orange]

snip

No, no, that didn't help at all still confusing as hell.

 

[Bindal]

snip

No, no, that didn't help at all still confusing as hell.

Well, then skip to 3:07 and watch the actual intro - far less confusing.

 

[Imp_Emissary]

I think he was going to slit his own throat with that fairly blunt locket. Suicide aside, that's fairly badass.

Fire damage enough to burn all her hair off and make it obvious she has no chance, and she still sounds perfectly healthy.

Burns all her hair, and all the skin we can see, but almost doesn't affect her dress. Must be a well made dress.

I was looking up fire retardant materials to say something snarky along the lines of "must have been made out of kevlar " but it turns out that wool is fire retardant so it could have been made out of that. Takes the fun out of it a little bit.

Well, look at the bright side.
We learned something neat about wool.
Granted, now that I'm writing this, I remember my Sheep friend once telling me this about wool, but thanks to you I now remember it again.

Small victories.

 

[Lazy Kitty]

So his name is Mason?

I bet his descendants become miners on Mars rebel against the Earth Defence Force.