what if michael bay remade a movie
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Shindler's List: A Micheal Bay Film!
Shia LaBeouf stars in this action packed adventure, Set in World War Two which was in the 70's or something, about the patriotic American soldier-turned industrial boss "Brad Schindler", and his attempts to save his Jewish prisoners from Hitlers DeathCamps.
Watch the political intrigue, as he uses his charm and likeability to selflessly seduce the Nazi femme fatale "Hanselletta" (played by Megan Fox) into granting him a factory for his Jews to work, then, as he sees more and more Jewish people taken away he contacts the British Prime Minister, "Lord Brit-posh" (Sean Connery) begging him to help him out, but the filthy English turns him down. About to lose hope only a rousing speech from the American President himself, John F. Kennedy (Micheal Bay in cameo) can snap Schindler out of his depression and cause him to finally take action.
Using the experimental weapons that Schindler himself designed for the Nazis, he and a group of American Navy Seals will personally take the fight all the way to Hitler's bunker in this historic epic.
Based on a true story.
Shia LaBeouf stars in this action packed adventure, Set in World War Two which was in the 70's or something, about the patriotic American soldier-turned industrial boss "Brad Schindler", and his attempts to save his Jewish prisoners from Hitlers DeathCamps.
Watch the political intrigue, as he uses his charm and likeability to selflessly seduce the Nazi femme fatale "Hanselletta" (played by Megan Fox) into granting him a factory for his Jews to work, then, as he sees more and more Jewish people taken away he contacts the British Prime Minister, "Lord Brit-posh" (Sean Connery) begging him to help him out, but the filthy English turns him down. About to lose hope only a rousing speech from the American President himself, John F. Kennedy (Micheal Bay in cameo) can snap Schindler out of his depression and cause him to finally take action.
Using the experimental weapons that Schindler himself designed for the Nazis, he and a group of American Navy Seals will personally take the fight all the way to Hitler's bunker in this historic epic.
Based on a true story.
Oh God. Also no Megan Fox. He hates her now, because she called him a Nazi...Hero in a half shell said:
OT: Actually, a remake of To Kill a Mockingbird would be hilarious to watch.
Also, he should make a Minecraft movie.
Shawshank Redemption would somehow end up with the story of an Ex Marine who is wrongfully imprisoned and contacts his marine friends to organize a mass prison break because marines are awesome and don't take fucking orders. Meanwhile there will be a paper thin romance sub plot whereby the main character is rewarded for his good deeds by being given a sex object to wield as a trophy.
I don't really like Michael Bay. I give The Rock a pass for being at least a little interesting.
I don't really like Michael Bay. I give The Rock a pass for being at least a little interesting.
Ok, he can replace her with that other model that he got for Transformers 3. (I haven't seen it yet, not going to unless I get to for free.)redisforever said:
Also I just found out he is heading up a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie for 2014. ARGH! DO NOT WANT! I'm gonna have to get a different Escapist account when that comes out, aren't I!
Way to judge a book by it's cover... "The Rock" was good,I enjoyed Transformers 1-3. Granted it was not what I expected as a lifelong fan (born in Jan of 84) but I enjoyed it. Every incarnation has its own retelling and it WAS far better than 'Tranformers: Armada' and 'Robots In Disguise'. What I read about TMNT 2014 has me looking forward to it. Rumors are that he is making it more like the ORIGINAL (aka they were trained by Splinter to MURDER Shredder) so that has me interested.Hero in a half shell said:
C'mon. Lets be fair for starters he could remake Street Fighter, Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun Li, Mortal Kombat Annilation, Double Dragon and Mario Bros and worst cast scenario we'd be no worse off than we already are.
It's too bad we're only talking remakes. If we're limited to remakes I think a Micheal Bay Robocop might actually be pretty damn good. Especially if we get someone to help him who's just a little bit dark. Not full on Tim Burton (God I just gave myself nightmares. Cus if Tim Burton was feeling his "Nightmare Before Christmas" when he did Robocop that could be some hardcore nightmare fuel) but just dark enough to keep it from being campy.
Still submitted for the approval of the Escapist forums. Micheal Bay presents My Little Pony. Twenty percent cooler than anything else when Rainbow Dash and Luna team up to perform a sonic double rainbow to banish Cthulu to a dark dimension! Except all the other explosions wouldn't make sense.
The man has shown himself to be okay at giant robots and pretty good with explosions. Can we just get a live action version of Gundam Wing:Endless Waltz? Sure you need to spend an extra few minutes explaining why we care but the story is sufficently stand alone that it won't alienated non-fans and it's just giant robots and explosions. It's like he was born to do this!
It's too bad we're only talking remakes. If we're limited to remakes I think a Micheal Bay Robocop might actually be pretty damn good. Especially if we get someone to help him who's just a little bit dark. Not full on Tim Burton (God I just gave myself nightmares. Cus if Tim Burton was feeling his "Nightmare Before Christmas" when he did Robocop that could be some hardcore nightmare fuel) but just dark enough to keep it from being campy.
Still submitted for the approval of the Escapist forums. Micheal Bay presents My Little Pony. Twenty percent cooler than anything else when Rainbow Dash and Luna team up to perform a sonic double rainbow to banish Cthulu to a dark dimension! Except all the other explosions wouldn't make sense.
The man has shown himself to be okay at giant robots and pretty good with explosions. Can we just get a live action version of Gundam Wing:Endless Waltz? Sure you need to spend an extra few minutes explaining why we care but the story is sufficently stand alone that it won't alienated non-fans and it's just giant robots and explosions. It's like he was born to do this!
We're already several chapters into Michael Bay's book. Now either it's just slow on the pickup and the latter chapters were co-written by Lars von Trier and co-produced by Paul Thomas Anderson, or this book sucks harder than the vacuum of space.Lrbearclaw said:
Hrmmm....
*fades*
BLAM BLAM BLAM
THIS SUMMER
-You gotta get to the car!
*explosion*
A man whose goals to walk the path of heaven
*Shaky came with bearded man with two guns in hand/ m16 machine gun*
Will have to make the ultimate sacrifice
-Peter! Look out! *explosion*
*Heavy music*
Lens flair/ tattered American flag in the background
THE PASSION: Directed by Michael Bay
*cuts*
*Jesus holding up a crucifix necklace to someone*
"This is my cross to bare"
*fades*
BLAM BLAM BLAM
THIS SUMMER
-You gotta get to the car!
*explosion*
A man whose goals to walk the path of heaven
*Shaky came with bearded man with two guns in hand/ m16 machine gun*
Will have to make the ultimate sacrifice
-Peter! Look out! *explosion*
*Heavy music*
Lens flair/ tattered American flag in the background
THE PASSION: Directed by Michael Bay
*cuts*
*Jesus holding up a crucifix necklace to someone*
"This is my cross to bare"
You think you know the story of William Wallace. What you don't know is that he had a little help.
(cut to Britain, pre-battle... Wallace, played by Shia LeBoeuf, gives his famous speech)
They can take our lives...
(soldiers start to move as a rumbling is heard, getting louder)
but they'll never take our FREEDOM!
(fighter jets drop bombs from above, complete with patriotic flyover shot... steel and chrome horses transform into giant robots and back... explosions, body parts and scrap metal litter the battlefield... Wallace himself is mounted on a horse that is clearly Optimus Prime... meanwhile, in the background of the battle, Longshanks sits and watches while holding Shiny McGuffin number 725, mounted on Megatron in horse form... an explosion fills the screen as Wallace and Prime jump through it)
Transformers 8: Braveheart
This summer, fight for freedom.
Directed by Michael Bay
(cut to Britain, pre-battle... Wallace, played by Shia LeBoeuf, gives his famous speech)
They can take our lives...
(soldiers start to move as a rumbling is heard, getting louder)
but they'll never take our FREEDOM!
(fighter jets drop bombs from above, complete with patriotic flyover shot... steel and chrome horses transform into giant robots and back... explosions, body parts and scrap metal litter the battlefield... Wallace himself is mounted on a horse that is clearly Optimus Prime... meanwhile, in the background of the battle, Longshanks sits and watches while holding Shiny McGuffin number 725, mounted on Megatron in horse form... an explosion fills the screen as Wallace and Prime jump through it)
Transformers 8: Braveheart
This summer, fight for freedom.
Directed by Michael Bay
