Zero Punctuation: Bulletstorm

[Yahtzee Croshaw]

Bulletstorm

This week, Zero Punctuation reviews Bulletstorm, the combined effort from the two developers who brought us Painkiller and Gears of War.

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[Aiddon_v1legacy]

I was hoping he'd praise, but ya can't win every time. I still had fun with it. Admittedly I wish they just went into full-blown parody mode instead of trying to act serious; did I mention that this was written by a comic book writer?

 

[Smeagol150]

Entertaining review, but I believe Bulletstorm is not supposed to be thought about very hard.

 

[SnootyEnglishman]

Hmm quite an interesting show. I laughed, i remembered the past, i don't think i cried though. Overall a good review. I'd played the demo and liked it so i have no change of opinions here unless you count going from liking to really wanting a change of opinion.

 

[The Ultimate 2]

I guess the gun skin that has flaming tits wasn't enough to save this game. Oh well I guess that's why the only shooters I play is Bioshock one and two. Ok Half life 2 and Portal also.

 

[Crimson_Dragoon]

I'm surprised he didn't mention that they answered his wish to have a gun that had tits on fire on it. Sure, it was just a painting on a gun, but it was a nice little call out to his Painkiller review.

 

[ZZoMBiE13]

I hold no special affinity for the "OLD DAYS" of shooter history. I'm more a fan of the newer design philosophies of today's shooters.

That said, I can't really stand Bulletstorm. And sadly I could not even figure out why. It just had no soul. It felt packaged and synthetic.

So I therefore dub it "BulletFAIL" and move on to playing Fight Night and Dragon Age 2.

 

[Madara XIII]

Forget the angst and homo erotic undertones.
Lets go kill something!

Pfffft I played Bullet Storm 12 years ago....

WHEN IT WAS CALLED WILD 9

 

[se7ensenses]

A gun w/ flaming tits all for not.

 

[True Nero]

I'm surprised he didn't mention that they answered his wish to have a gun that had tits on fire on it. Sure, it was just a painting on a gun, but it was a nice little call out to his Painkiller review.

probably because to see it you have to play the multiplayer. we all know his opinion on that, but in bulletstorm its almost justified. i can't play it without three friends cause jumping into a random game with random people who don't have mics is as fun as putting my eyeball under a drill press. there is a level of fun to it, but it needs to be well coordinated

 

[Cat of Doom]

Ohh seems the flameing tits gu wasnt enouth to butter Yahtzee up.

 

[Cyrax023]

i also lost things to a starship trooper.... but i dont want to talk about it.

 

[Mr Binary]

Yahtzee is by far the best reviewer on the web. I also agree with what was said about Bullet Storm. It was alright, not amazing.

 

[Catalyst6]

I wonder how much of Yahtzee's love for bullet-painting games comes from the fact that he grew up around them, compared to the breed of gamer that was introduced to shooters around the Halo era. I'd be interested to see how the tastes of people from the same general gaming era compare.

 

[Squilookle]

I still find it hard to believe that the same company that brought us the Godlike lightning-fast Unreal Tournament also brought us Gears of War.

Does bulletstorm at least have bots in multiplayer? Does it at least do that!?

Now I think about it I don't remember ANYONE complaining about unrealism in shooters in the 90s.

God I miss the 90s....

 

[The Rogue Wolf]

I wish I could say I'm surprised, but this really does sound like the bastard child of People Can Fly (who basically say "here are many mans, blow them up how you see fit") and Epic Games (who have founded the nation of ChestHighWallistan). These are two core philosophies that don't combine well normally, and it looks like Bulletstorm is not the magical, mystical exception to the rule.

Still, I'm surprised there wasn't any sort of comment on the gun with flaming tits on it.

 

[Not G. Ivingname]

Snip

The lack of people in on the joke is larger then you think.

Remember "Duty Calls?" One of the jokes aimed at modern shooters was your main character could only jump an inch above the ground.

They followed this up by taking away any ability to jump in Bulletstorm.

Well, at least Serious Sam 3 is coming out this summer.

 

[Wolfram23]

Wait just one second... Bulletstorm has single player?

 

[CrazyCapnMorgan]

I can now never look at a box of "Grape Nuts" cereal again without bursting into complete laughter.