A little help here

[WorldCritic]

My question here, if one is friends with someone for a long time before dating them, how do they know if they actually like them or just feel close to them? I ask because I am attempting to logically analyze a current situation I'm in with one of my best friends based on experience with my previous relationships, and it's not exactly working out. Basically, if you have known someone for years, how do you know when you like them and when the two of you are just good friends?

I apologize for this sounding awkward. This is the first time I've had to post something in this part of the forums.

 

[burningdragoon]

logically analyze

Stop right there. As nice as it would be, that's not how these things work.

Short version is it's really, really hard to tell sometimes. I'd imagine at some point it will just click when you go from "I like this person" to "I like this person". If you are trying to figure out how the other person is feeling, I guess look for some subtle differences between how she acts and reacts to you. Cuz, subtle differences are probably the only differences there will be until you bring more um, relationshippy things into play.

 

[WorldCritic]

I'd say when sexuality comes into play.

Yeah, not entirely sure what you mean by that.

 

[DragonChild]

Dating close friends is not recommended. Yet the best relationships that last forever (or so I've heard) tend to spring from close bonds. I'd go for the direct approach and ask the person if you think he/she loves you. Can't hurt if you take the risk. Of course if the answer is no, then everything from that point will be awkward. You first have to identify the difference in like and love. I think of like as a temporary infatuation, whereas love is something that is permanent and everlasting. Do you like/love said person?

The thing with best friends is that both are already close. You can think of them as brothers or sisters. People you can count on until the very end. Perhaps the best thing in your situation is to pay close attention to how the person behaves. A word of advice: Do not obsess or magnify the simplest of things or events. Suppose the person brushes your hair with his/her hand and you think "Wow! He/She has never done that before," when in reality it may have been an insect that the person was removing.

 

[icame]

Having never been in a situation like this I don't know from personal experience. Looking at what I could gather from your story you are trying to decide whether you like a friend, or just think of them as friends. Honestly, all I can tell you is to look into your emotions and try to decide. Thinking about this logically is not going to get you anywhere. Sorry for not being any help :/

 

[Hop-along Nussbaum]

Best way to judge your feelings for someone, is to hold (or try to hold) their hand. A simple holding of hands can reveal a lot about feelings for a person, between to people, and about the relationship in general.

How do you feel about letting people see you holding hands. How does that person feel about holding YOUR hand? Etc.

And you never even have to speak a word.