A question about alcohol-consumption habits.

[knhirt]

A little bit of background:
I'm nineteen years old. My friends enjoy spending their weekends drinking and all parties I've heard about seem to feature drinking as the main attraction. I'm not very sociable, but I am very close to my few friends. However, I don't drink alcohol. I don't particularly enjoy being around the inebriated either.
I don't have a problem with my friends spending their time drinking, and I never pass judgement on them for their habits (despite being against them personally), but I just wish they'd spend more time sober.
As far as I know, their behavior is the norm and I am somewhat of an outcast in my decision not to drink.
My question is (and this is intended for older members more than youngsters like me): Does this trend of drinking on weekends and going to drinking-parties all the time tend to die down at some point in life close to mine?
I'm sick of spending my nights alone, but I really don't want to take part in the alcohol-culture. Am I doomed to lonely nights, or does your experience indicate that people stop drinking so much in their early twenties?

I'm pretty sure I know the answer already, but I'd really like some input from people who have gone through this phase in their lives.

 

[DefunctTheory]

When you hit the legal drinking age, it dies out pretty quick. The novelty of it dies.

It turns into a once a month/bimonthly event sort of thing, usually grouped together with an attempt to get laid.

 

[NaturalCauses]

When you hit the legal drinking age, it dies out pretty quick. The novelty of it dies.

It turns into a once a month/bimonthly event sort of thing, usually grouped together with an attempt to get laid.

Good to hear. I'm a bit in the same problem. I went to a party yesterday and could barely finish a glass of wine; gross. Once my friends got to the point of running around the room screaming about how high their heels made them, the one sober girl left and I walked home together.

 

[Cliff_m85]

I drink on special occassions. My birthday is this month so I'm hoping to get a bottle of Sambuca to sip on.

 

[Chased]

I'm attending a fairly thirsty college now and I've always abstained from drinking. It is kinda the norm it seems in American college life to drink. (idk, I haven't been to college anywhere else or have heard of experiences). You are by no means an outcast, there are people that don't drink or care for it either like myself.

It doesn't really have to do with drinking per say but the film Fight Club is a great example of how heavily screwed up our cultures views are and how everyone is supposed to act as perceived by the media. I'd give it watch if you've never seen it, reassures oneself in going against conformity.

 

[knhirt]

When you hit the legal drinking age, it dies out pretty quick. The novelty of it dies.

It turns into a once a month/bimonthly event sort of thing, usually grouped together with an attempt to get laid.

I'm glad to hear that. About two years to go, then. I guess it could be worse.

I'm attending a fairly thirsty college now and I've always abstained from drinking. It is kinda the norm it seems in American college life to drink. (idk, I haven't been to college anywhere else or have heard of experiences). You are by no means an outcast, there are people that don't drink or care for it either like myself.

It doesn't really have to do with drinking per say but the film Fight Club is a great example of how heavily screwed up our cultures views are and how everyone is supposed to act as perceived by the media. I'd give it watch if you've never seen it, reassures oneself in going against conformity.

I'm aware that there are quite a few people that don't drink, but it's pretty hard to run into them. I hope that when I get back into school I will meet some people that know how to have fun without drinking.
I've seen Fight Club, it was pretty good. I've never had any problem with going against conformity (I was named after a planet, comes with the territory), but jeez if it doesn't get lonely on the weekends.
Our culture is mighty screwed up.

I drink on special occassions. My birthday is this month so I'm hoping to get a bottle of Sambuca to sip on.

Sounds reasonable. I hope that my friends end up behaving like that.


--

Thanks everyone who has replied, I have high hopes for the time after the next two or three years.

 

[chaos order]

A little bit of background:
I'm nineteen years old. My friends enjoy spending their weekends drinking and all parties I've heard about seem to feature drinking as the main attraction. I'm not very sociable, but I am very close to my few friends. However, I don't drink alcohol. I don't particularly enjoy being around the inebriated either.
I don't have a problem with my friends spending their time drinking, and I never pass judgement on them for their habits (despite being against them personally), but I just wish they'd spend more time sober.
As far as I know, their behavior is the norm and I am somewhat of an outcast in my decision not to drink.
My question is (and this is intended for older members more than youngsters like me): Does this trend of drinking on weekends and going to drinking-parties all the time tend to die down at some point in life close to mine?
I'm sick of spending my nights alone, but I really don't want to take part in the alcohol-culture. Am I doomed to lonely nights, or does your experience indicate that people stop drinking so much in their early twenties?

I'm pretty sure I know the answer already, but I'd really like some input from people who have gone through this phase in their lives.

wow in pretty much the exact same situation as u!

except im 19 and thats the legal drinking age here plus my birthday is on march 17, the freaking international day of drinking (fml)

 

[Aur0ra145]

When you hit the legal drinking age, it dies out pretty quick. The novelty of it dies.

It turns into a once a month/bimonthly event sort of thing, usually grouped together with an attempt to get laid.

True to fact, I turned 21 and have pretty much completely stopped drinking.

 

[WolfThomas]

I hope so. I'm 21 and I can't stand going out clubbing and drinking. That said I love having a beer at a pub with mates or having quite a few at a house party or a hot summers days down by the river or some six packs, pizza and xbox LAN.

 

[Blind Sight]

Yeah I'm not a huge fan of alcohol either, but mostly because in order to have a social life in university it seems everyone has to folk over eight bucks for a beer at a pub. It's always bars, bars, bars, honestly I don't know how most of them afford it with how expensive school is. I personally can't stand clubs either, too loud for me, I like a good beer and a relaxing atmosphere.

Some folks calm down about hardcore drinking fairly quickly, others keep going until they hit a brick wall. The trick is to know when to stop.

 

[RhombusHatesYou]

Am I doomed to lonely nights, or does your experience indicate that people stop drinking so much in their early twenties?

In my experience, no. Then again, Australia has a legal drinking age of 18 and a pisshead culture so I don't know how applicable that is for you.

What slows down people's drinking is usually an accumulation of responsibilities and expenses. Life after school is more than happy to supply plenty of those so don't worry too much.

 

[Nieroshai]

I find that most of my friends are similar to me in that they really don't give a rat's ass about alcohol. If I want a buzz, I go for an energy drink because I want mental clarity as a part of my buzz, not a foggy brain. But that's just me. I'm a bit of a caffiene junkie.

 

[Blunderman]

I wish it would die off but where I live it sticks around well into people's 20s, sometimes 30s. Drinking absurd amounts of alcohol three times a week, having no other interests than playing the social popularity game and promiscuous sex. That's all well and fine but when I was 16 (quite some time ago now) there wasn't a single person in town that I could relate to and I became increasingly convinced that my mental age skipped from 10 to 45 right around that time.

Even though one can be forgiven for almost shouting in disbelief over how getting completely shit-faced is somehow a fun activity, I can admit that just like with more psychologically potent drugs it's a relief to tear your mind from the tragedy of reality, even if said drinkers probably aren't mentally astute enough to grasp the meaninglessness of life on an intimate level.

To you I'd say try to find new friends that do not drink while still being around your age. Waiting around for your current friends to mature will probably get old quite quickly.

 

[Good morning blues]

This will almost certainly not go away any time soon. Can I ask why you don't drink?

 

[knhirt]

I wish it would die off but where I live it sticks around well into people's 20s, sometimes 30s. Drinking absurd amounts of alcohol three times a week, having no other interests than playing the social popularity game and promiscuous sex. That's all well and fine but when I was 16 (quite some time ago now) there wasn't a single person in town that I could relate to and I became increasingly convinced that my mental age skipped from 10 to 45 right around that time.

Even though one can be forgiven for almost shouting in disbelief over how getting completely shit-faced is somehow a fun activity, I can admit that just like with more psychologically potent drugs it's a relief to tear your mind from the tragedy of reality, even if said drinkers probably aren't mentally astute enough to grasp the meaninglessness of life on an intimate level.

To you I'd say try to find new friends that do not drink while still being around your age. Waiting around for your current friends to mature will probably get old quite quickly.

That first paragraph sounds pretty much just like the way I've felt for years.
I don't like to think of myself as very mature (since I'm still young and I now feel it pompous of myself to declare myself "older" mentally than my peers), but it's a lingering feeling just the same.

I understand the whole "getting away from reality" aspect of it, but dammit, I wish people would prefer my company over escaping from the real world.
Now that you brought it up, this is probably the root of my issue with the whole damn thing. I feel reduced as a human being when parties with strangers while under the influence comes before spending time with me.
I guess that's something I should work on improving with myself. My self esteem is pretty much nonexistent, these days.

I don't know about meeting new friends. Maybe when I go to school once more, but until then, I'm pretty much disconnected from the rest of the world.
What a pain.

Thanks for your input.

 

[justnotcricket]

Hm, speaking from my own experience (and I was/am exactly like you in the sense that I don't drink - much - and don't like getting or being around people who are drunk), it does tend to die down once people are a bit older and have jobs and things that they can't turn up hung-over to. Or families, things like that. The party/clubbing/drinking culture SEEMS to die down in the twenties/early thirties. Eventually, those who try to drag it out past a certain point just end up looking tragic and desperate, even to friends who used to go partying with them.

Personally, I'm fond of a nice drink or two occasionally to round out a good evening/dinner/party (and I mean party in the sense that it's someone's birthday/hosewarming/dinner party or something, not a party where the intention is that everyone gets wasted, like in college). I never get drunk though, and it's more about enjoying the taste of the drink and relaxing with friends/my partner than drinking in quantity. I don't need to get drunk to have a good time, and I feel very sorry for people who do. Besides, getting drunk is a dangerous business for me - I discovered that I have pretty epic tolerance, and I don't like beer or wine much, being more a fan of nice spirits.

High tolerance + hard liquor + testing boundaries = ...well, I'm not a huge fan of alcohol poisoning, personally. ;-P

 

[knhirt]

This will almost certainly not go away any time soon. Can I ask why you don't drink?

There are many reasons, I'll try to outline the gist of them quickly.
1. I hate the taste and aroma of alcohol. It's not appealing to me as a flavor, so I rather drink things I like the flavor of.
2. I'm not fond of the whole losing control of your actions bit, as well as stumbling around as a general fool. I'm quite capable of acting the fool without liquor.
3. Alcoholism is a disease that has affected my family and myself in the past. It's sort of a turnoff.
4. I am repulsed by the way people act when they're drunk. I'd rather not act like that myself.

It's just their choice. No matter how you word this you still are looking down at them for their choice.

If they enjoy it who are you to want them to stop? If you're a friend and want to spend time with them. Make compromises. They'll more than likely make compromises for you too.

If not. Then they're not friends.

I do loads of stuff with my mates that I don't particularly love doing. They do the same for us.

And if you tried one of their nights out you might even enjoy it. Getting drunk and having a laugh with your friends is one of my favourite pass times. Infact I was out about 5 hours ago. The only reason I'm sober enough to be typing this now is because I didn't have the money on me to stay out for longer.

I look down on a lot of people for a lot of things.
I look down on myself for a lot of things.
A lot of people look down on me for a lot of things.

I'd rather they do it less frequently. I've partied with them, but I'm not in their drinking social clubs, so I don't get invited to many parties. Anyway, I get quite sick looking at people filthy-drunk and I can't have a very good time when surrounded by people that are intoxicated. Sorry.
I don't want any fucking compromises. I just want people to realize that alcohol isn't all there is to a good weekend. Mostly, I don't want to be lonely. Pretty standard human thinking in that last one, I'm sure.

They are very good friends, but I don't share their interest in alcohol. You're in no position to judge a friendship that you know only one side of, I'm sorry.

 

[SimuLord]

I've never had a drink when I've been legally old enough to do so. I quit at age 19. Sober for over 14 years now.