Aliens are looting the Earth! What do you do?

[Froggy Slayer]

So, a dangerous alien race has began pilfering the Earth for supplies!The aliens are reptilian, 8 ft tall, warlike, have technology that is approximately 22nd century level, and come in one group of around 100,000,000. They are looking for materials, taking things seemingly at random (but which surely have a purpose known only to them). They may be interested in colonisation, which is why they aren't just destroying cities from orbit. What do you do?

Captcha: KLATU BERADA NIKTO. How appropriate!

 

[ShinyCharizard]

I proceed to shit my pants and hope they don't find me. Honestly what am I meant to do against 100 million advanced warlike reptilians.

 

[GameChanger]

*sigh*

Time to bring out the MacBook again.

 

[Nouw]

Damn it Pacific Rim, I thought they were supposed to come from deep beneath the sea! Quick, get the giant robot mechas!

Captcha: KLATU BERADA NIKTO. How appropriate!

That's fucking hilarious. Wrong apocalypse though.

*sigh*

Time to bring out the MacBook again.

I'm sticking with my stereo and copy of Slim Whitman's 'Indian Love Call.'

 

[Athol]

In my mind:
Join what ever resistance movment there is and fight to throw those damned lizards off out world!

In reality:
Soil myself and try to hide like most everyone else.

CAPTCHA:stranger danger (disturbingly appropriate)

 

[Lectori Salutem]

I don't know. I'd love to save the Escapist, but the bacon might be more useful if I want to survive.

Wait...

 

[Groxnax]

Option 1: I join the local resistance.

Option 2: Ask the aliens if the need a spy to keep an eye on the local resistance groups.

Reality: Crap self and find nearest underground bunker.

 

[Rawne1980]

Find out what 8ft lizardman tastes like.

100.000.000 of them, that would keep us in meat for a while and also rid the planet slowly of large lizard people.

 

[Little Woodsman]

Set up a shop to sell them cheap knockoff souvenirs of course!
Little globes full of water with a miniature Earth city at the bottom and when you shake it up, it shows
thousands of little tiny spaceships coming down on the city!
Shot glasses with a picture of the Earth on them and the phrase "best (terrestrial liquor of choice) in the Galaxy!"
And most importantly XXXXXL T-shirts that say "I conquered the Earth, and all I got was this lousy T-Shirt".

 

[CpT_x_Killsteal]

Hide. Hide better than I've ever hidden before! Then one day finally grow the balls to take out one on his own.

 

[King of Asgaard]

What anyone would do: Amass a team of specialists to join me in sieging the aliens' base. It would be suicide mission, but the rewards would be worth the losses.

Alternatively, if their force is too large, I would unite all the other alien races uncovered at the time in order to match the aliens in all-out galactic war.

 

[Trippy Turtle]

The only real answer here is to find the nicest looking lizard and try to become a pet/companion of sorts to it. Maybe I will get to go to its planet and play some weird alien video games.

 

[PsychicTaco115]

I'd probably join in the looting

With alien overlords, a black market will most likely spring up and I want full control, dagnabit!

 

[Thaluikhain]

That level of technology, not much we can do.

Mind you, very much like to find out what they are here for. Earth doesn't have much that you can't get elsewhere, except for living things.

So, most things you'd want to get, you could get without all those annoying living things getting in the way, unless you are interested in living things.

Say, if the aliens wanted to nick stuff humans had made to stick in their alien museums, same as European museums did with less developed countries' stuff.

 

[Coffeejack]

Bake them a welcome cake. It would keep me calm and occupied.

 

[Coffeejack]

Earth doesn't have much that you can't get elsewhere, except for living things...

On the contrary: Earth does the finest Jam Roly-Poly in the galaxy, as far as I know.

 

[magicmonkeybars]

I for one welcome our new reptilian overlords and worship them openly.

 

[Thaluikhain]

Earth doesn't have much that you can't get elsewhere, except for living things...

On the contrary: Earth does the finest Jam Roly-Poly in the galaxy, as far as I know.

Well, yes, but those are created by the living things.

 

[HellbirdIV]

I'd tell people to hide and let the aliens take whatever they want. If the aliens are "war-like" but just taking material things through force of arms, I say let them - better that they take whatever they want and leave than stay around to kill the shit out of us.

It's the "If a mugger pulls a knife on you, give them your cellphone" method of not dying like an idiot, taken to interstellar levels.