Am i Justified.

[Elhueno]

Alrighty escapist just a self inspection thread im going to post here.

Recently (1 and a half weeks) I broke up with my girlfriend of a long time. Anyway today I found out that she has started dating one of my friends. This im fine with. Its good to see both of us moving on etc.

My concern with this, my friend has a habit of being desperate and going after pretty much any decent single girl. This is where it gets interesting. My ex had a few emotional problems and can be unstable at times and last i knew by talking to her friends, she was still crying daily over our breakup.

Anyhow i talked to her today and told her about my friends reputation and left it at that. After all, we didnt end things badly, it was just time and i still feel we are friends.

My question to the escapist is, did i do the right thing? Am I still hung up on her? If you have ever been or were in this position what would you do?

Thankyou in advance, this whole period has been an interesting view into human thinking.

 

[Frequen-Z]

Warning her was probably the right thing to do. Although I might not be the best guy to quote on that, I prefer to have messy hateful break ups. To me, once you start loving someone, you either never stop or you start to hate them. But that's not really relevant.

 

[ThePocketWeasel]

I personally think you did the right thing. I guess the only question you can ask really is if she wasn't your ex and just a friend would you have told her about it?

 

[Elhueno]

I personally think you did the right thing. I guess the only question you can ask really is if she wasn't your ex and just a friend would you have told her about it?

And this is why i come to you people

Thats a different way of looking at it and i would say i would have. the main reason now that i have posted this is because it upset her immensley and she isnt talking anymore. I just had to get a complete outsiders opinion on the events. Thanks again.

 

[RobThePrezodent]

if she knew about your friend already, maybe reminding her wasn't necessary, but all in all i think I'd have done the same, so yeah it seems the right thing to have done

 

[Elhueno]

snip

You might want to PM BonsaiK [http://www.escapistmagazine.com/profiles/view/BonsaiK] with this, he runs a relationship advice thread.

Duly noted thankyou again

 

[LongAndShort]

You did the right thing. I try and warn chicks about my mates whenever I can. They rarely believe me, but I try. It's not that I want to undermine my mates, its just that they are complete dicks when it comes to women, and I like to be able to say "don't say I didn't warn you."

My advice is that if you feel guiltier about telling her than you would have otherwise, you done the wrong thing. If you don't, you've done the right thing. Guilt is a wonderful thing when used personally and appropriately.

 

[awesomeClaw]

Do you mean this kind of justified?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X3p-T8Y7_rU&feature=related

If so, no.

Otherwise. yeah, you did the right thing.

 

[BonsaiK]

Alrighty escapist just a self inspection thread im going to post here.

Recently (1 and a half weeks) I broke up with my girlfriend of a long time. Anyway today I found out that she has started dating one of my friends. This im fine with. Its good to see both of us moving on etc.

My concern with this, my friend has a habit of being desperate and going after pretty much any decent single girl. This is where it gets interesting. My ex had a few emotional problems and can be unstable at times and last i knew by talking to her friends, she was still crying daily over our breakup.

Anyhow i talked to her today and told her about my friends reputation and left it at that. After all, we didnt end things badly, it was just time and i still feel we are friends.

My question to the escapist is, did i do the right thing? Am I still hung up on her? If you have ever been or were in this position what would you do?

Thankyou in advance, this whole period has been an interesting view into human thinking.

Answered in the Relationship Problem Thread, at the following link: -----> http://www.escapistmagazine.com/forums/read/18.117161-Relationship-problem-thread?page=30#5628022

 

[Insanum]

You warned her about your friend, As long as you werent being possessive (she's MINE not my friends) you did the right thing.

 

[OmegaXzors]

I see that people are trying to sympathize with what you did however, here I am to change that.

You're a giant dick. You don't meddle with other people's affairs. Did the guy rape your friends or murder some kid's puppy? If yes, that's a valid reason. His only problem you stated was that "he's desperate and will go for single women." That my dear fellow isn't a reason to try and get a girl riled up over her new relationship.

All I see is that you're oozing jealousy out of every open portion of your body. You may not want her back, but it just irritates you to see her in the arms of another.

Desperate guys have a tendency care easily for any girl he gets. They usually have a big heart, they'll treat her like gold, spend all their available cash on her, and want hear her voice when he can...because they're desperate boys! He wants to keep her, wouldn't you agree?

If he wants to turn her into a sex puppet, that's his asinine choice. Of course, I'm just pulling reasons out of my ass because you only provided one pretty pathetic reason as to why this guy is a pile of shit to be watched on her radar. Now, if he's violent, I'll withhold everything that was said here because that's a fucking asshole. You need to elaborate on his so called "problem."

 

[Kelbear]

Alrighty escapist just a self inspection thread im going to post here.

Recently (1 and a half weeks) I broke up with my girlfriend of a long time. Anyway today I found out that she has started dating one of my friends. This im fine with. Its good to see both of us moving on etc.

My concern with this, my friend has a habit of being desperate and going after pretty much any decent single girl. This is where it gets interesting. My ex had a few emotional problems and can be unstable at times and last i knew by talking to her friends, she was still crying daily over our breakup.

Anyhow i talked to her today and told her about my friends reputation and left it at that. After all, we didnt end things badly, it was just time and i still feel we are friends.

My question to the escapist is, did i do the right thing? Am I still hung up on her? If you have ever been or were in this position what would you do?

Thankyou in advance, this whole period has been an interesting view into human thinking.

1) Your friend is an ass for breaking the guy code. You do NOT bang your friend's Ex. That's the rule.

2) You are too hung up. Rid yourself of all feeling for her. Stop all communication, and remove anything that reminds you of her. Ignore anything involving her, and don't spend any time thinking about her. After she's become the equivalent of a complete and total stranger, then you can talk to her on that basis and see if you can make a new relationship rather than one based on your history.

 

[Lazy Kitty]

I guess you did the right thing...

 

[ObviousRedSpy]

I would have just stayed out of it ,personally.

 

[Z(ombie)fan]

yea your justified.

though if it happened to me, the standards required for me to be in a relation with girl are so high that breaking up would fuck me over BADLY.

so, by extension, I wouldn't do that because i'd be angrier than all hell.