And shit hits the fan

[Miss_M]

Being locked out the house and being desperate for a whizz. I climbed the fence into our back garden, stacked 8 deck chairs on top of each other to reach the gazebo roof, and swung onto the conservatory roof (which creaks very menacingly) and in through an open upstairs window.

That was also a great day because I realised that I am secretly a ninja.

 

[TaborMallory]

EDIT: Sorry, ignore this post. Too shameful.

 

[Baby Eater]

Being locked out the house and being desperate for a whizz. I climbed the fence into our back garden, stacked 8 deck chairs on top of each other to reach the gazebo roof, and swung onto the conservatory roof (which creaks very menacingly) and in through an open upstairs window.

That was also a great day because I realised that I am secretly a ninja.

this post is batshit awesomeness

 

[Agrael]

I got my jaw busted in two places...

I spent my jaws wired shut for the next 31 days.

Mmmm.... fluids

 

[Darth Pope]

The most life threatening situation I was ever in was probably when I was chased down by a pissed of rottweiler.

The only thing that saved me was my mother who for some the reason the dog found threatening >.>

 

[quiet_samurai]

Being locked out the house and being desperate for a whizz. I climbed the fence into our back garden, stacked 8 deck chairs on top of each other to reach the gazebo roof, and swung onto the conservatory roof (which creaks very menacingly) and in through an open upstairs window.

That was also a great day because I realised that I am secretly a ninja.

Fucking Rad. Except a true ninja isn't bothered by a creaky roof.


When I was drunk in public and underage a cop walked up to me and shined a light in my face telling me not to move. When he lowered the light I saw he was about 65 and extremely obese. I ran and successfully escaped.

 

[SmartIdiot]

Realising I was the girl I was with was a lying whore. I got out of it by telling her I never wanted to see her again and basically creating a scene so that everyone knew she was a whore. And liar. Then every time she's tried to approach me since and ask if she'll take me back I just rip her to shreds, again, in front of everyone. That's how I stay out of it.

 

[12345cyclone]

One of my worst situations involved being ganged up on by a group of five thugs in high school. I got out of it by moving like an animal, wearing a look of insane glee, and letting out a cackle whenever I went to 'attack' someone. I wasn't near a match for a that many kids (two of which were my size), but I scared the crap out of them by acting like a maniac.

And this, kids, is how you're supposed to use Bluff in a combat situation.

...or just groin shot them all. Then bash at their pancreas while they are writhing in pain.

Or you do what this dude did...

http://www.derrickcomedy.com/2007/08/21/self-defense/

PULL OUT YOUR GUN!!!

 

[lacktheknack]

Fence-posted by a thirty foot wave.

I got out by crawling away to nurse my neck.

 

[DoW Lowen]

Hmmm being held at knife point.

I got out of it by giving my money.

What did you expect some epic ninja skills?

 

[Sonicron]

Having a 2-ton steel gate drop on my leg. I dragged myself out from under it somehow.
Hurt like fuck, but neither my leg nor my foot had suffered even a partial fracture. Apparently I have teh superbonez... or being a big milk drinker REALLY pays off.

 

[Wildrow12]

Fence-posted by a thirty foot wave.

I got out by crawling away to nurse my neck.

Forgive me for prying but may I ask for clarification: you mean a thirty foot wave threw you INTO a fence post, drove you into the shore LIKE a fence post, or dressed you up like Tom Sawyer and made you PAINT a fence post?

 

[theSovietConnection]

*Snip*

Wow... You have my sincerest sympathies. Hope things may go your way soon.

On topic, worst situation I've ever been in would have to have been catching swine flu. I got out of it by getting better.

 

[lacktheknack]

Fence-posted by a thirty foot wave.

I got out by crawling away to nurse my neck.

Forgive me for prying but may I ask for clarification: you mean a thirty foot wave threw you INTO a fence post, drove you into the shore LIKE a fence post, or dressed you up like Tom Sawyer and made you PAINT a fence post?

The third second one.

 

[fulano]

what is the worst situation you have ever been in and how did you get out of it (if you did get out of it)

The worse time of my life was from when I was something like 6 to about 9 years old.

My mother had started going out with a guy named Stewart, he used to beat her up most nights. This, of course, went on for up to three years...

EDIT: Oh yeah, how I got out of it, well bascially my mum suddenly worked out that Sterwart wasn't going to change so she left him and we went to live in a hostel for a while before settling here. Only took her three bloody years.

Some women never get it and do squat because the fear gets to them. Be thankful your mom figured it out when she did.

 

[Wildrow12]

Fence-posted by a thirty foot wave.

I got out by crawling away to nurse my neck.

Forgive me for prying but may I ask for clarification: you mean a thirty foot wave threw you INTO a fence post, drove you into the shore LIKE a fence post, or dressed you up like Tom Sawyer and made you PAINT a fence post?

The third second one.

Dually noted. Thank you!

 

[Craig FTW]

We had to retake all our 9th grade Regents and Finals in the first week of 10th grade to make sure we remembered everything over the summer, and if we failed we got sent back to 9th grade.

I got out of this by waking up, covered in more sweat than I thought I could generate.

 

[hungoverbear]

I almost LITERALLY died once. couple years ago i used to take about 2 different supplaments before my workouts. Well it was gonna be a busy day so i decided to take 4 different supplaments to compensate the lack of nutrients that i wouldn't be getting throughout my day. Long story short i wound up with a heart rate of 198bpm and a blood pressure of 60 over 40, to sum it up i was knocking on heaven's door. But thanks to the quick thinking of the hospital staff I am alive today, even though i should have died right then and there.