Apply the most inappropriate director you can think of to your favourite IP

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Thomas Barnsley

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I was having this discussion with a friend and it ended up being rather interesting. Basically, imagine if a book or a game or a comic got a movie made for it, but it got directed by someone who's style is completely off from that of the source material. What would be lost, what would perhaps be gained? Try to diversify from the obvious Michael Bay where possible.

The example I thought of was a Dune movie (in my mind a lot since Legendary bought the rights) directed by Quentin Tarantino. A great book and, in my opinion, a great director. In some ways I'd love to see what he does with the content, but in a lot of ways the combination just feels so wrong. Not a lot of witty, irreverant reparte for Tarantino to go off, little scope for a non-linear narrative, and altogether too much beauty and epic goings-on for him to handle.
"Tell me again of the waters of your homeworld, ************! I dare you, I double dare you ************!" comes to mind.
 

Kinokohatake

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Queen Michael said:
The director: Uwe Boll.

The ip: Any ip at all.
Damn your ninja ways.

OT- Well Michael Bay did already say he wanted to make Neon Genesis Evangelion. Hmmm how about a good director...Stanley Kubrick's GI Joes!

or

Pixar presents, Brad Bird's Elfen Lied.

or

Tim Burton's Pokemon!
 

Hawki

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Oh, come on guys, nominating Michael Bay and Uwe Bowl is like shooting fish in a barrel.

Actually, to be fair, while I don't really like any of his films, Bay does strike me as being competent, at least as far as cinematography goes. The Transformers films I've seen are lacklustre, and Pearl Harbour/Armageddon aren't much better, but I don't really have a problem with how they're directed. Unlike, saw, Bowl; while I haven't seen any of his films, looking at reviews of them, some of the cinematography looks absolutely horrendous.

But, okay, I'll play - I'm not really a follower of directors, as in, telling me that a movie is directed by (insert name here) is rarely a selling point or detracting point in of itself. But I guess I can throw out the following:

1) Steven Spielberg/Blade Runner

Ask me who my favorite director is, and I'd probably say Spielberg. That said, I don't think he's the greatest director ever, at least in as much as contributing to the medium (i.e. he's not exactly Kubrick or Hitchcock) but I do tend to really enjoy his films. That said, there are some tropes that he's fond of, and I can't see them being applied to Blade Runner, which is meant to be cold, unfeeling, where human relationships and the human spirit are broken down, etc. Spielberg usually places emphasis on family ties and childhood innocence, and while in most cases that works, in Blade Runner? Not so much.

2) Neil Blokamp/Alien (note: I erronously listed Duncan Jones in Blokamp's place, no idea how - I've corrected it)

No Blokamp, I don't think retconning Alien 3, Alien: Resurrection, and every piece of associated media is a good idea, just so you can "finish Ripley's story." I mean, fine, I like Alien 3 a lot more than a lot of people, but even if I didn't, I wouldn't want it retconned because of your desire to do a fanfic film. And besides, Elysium was lacklustre, and while I hear good things about District 9, that does seem to be a blip in your filmography.

So please, please, just leave the setting alone. :(

3) Christopher Nolan/Stanly Kubrick/Peter Pan

Okay, I'll say it - I'm not that enamored of either of these directors, but I can't help but respect them. Kubrick, I've only seen 2001 and about 60% of Full Metal Jacket, while with Nolan, I've seen his Batman films, Inception, and Interstellar. Focusing on Nolan for a bit, I don't think he's as great as a director as many say, but damn it, I can't fault the variety in his films, and even if they don't always land (e.g. Interstellar), you can't fault the ambition behind them.

So, why Peter Pan? Because Peter Pan is a property that's based in whimsy, childhood adventure, etc. The book has a dark undercurrent to it, but I've never seen anyone else say so, so maybe it's just me. But by virtue of said whimsy, this is a property that Kubrick and Nolan should stay away from, since there's a 'coldness' in all of their films that I don't think would translate well unless it was a dissection of the IP (Nostalgia Critic's AI review demonstrates this better than I can, contrasting Spielberg and Kubrick). Granted, Kubrick's dead, so that kind of helps, but, yeah.

4) James Cameron/Jurassic Park

Only because I've read what Cameron would have done with the first film, and...yeah. Not sold. I like Cameron's films (yes, even Avatar - heck, far more than True Lies), but I can't really discuss any directing style he has per se. But, yeah, I don't doubt that Spielberg's version is better than what Cameron would have done.

5) Roland Emmerich/Foundation

I'm generally apathetic about Emmerich - I find his films to be mostly average, with the occassional standout (e.g. Independence Day and Anonymous). But dear god, he is the wrong director to take on Foundation. I mean, almost Michael Bay levels of wrong. I mean, Emmerich, I think you can do good films (e.g. ID4), you can even do good films that don't have explosions (e.g. Anonymous), but egads man, stick with what you know.
 

Hawki

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Ooh, thought of another one:

M. Night Shamalyan/Lord of the Rings

Okay, I'll be honest - the only Shamalyan film I've seen is The Last Airbender, and while not a good film by any means, I'm not that aggreived by it (even if it doesn't hold a candle to the cartoon). I know I'm an oddity, but even that aside, I've always been a bit perplexed by the hate on Shamalyan. Looking at his filmography, while he seems to be on an inverse bell curve in regards to quality (goes down after Signs, seems to have regained some swagger after The Visit), I can't fault him for the variety of ideas he's at least tried to execute. That said, something that reviewers like Chris Stuckmann have pointed out (and that I agree with, based on the curve of the ratings), is that Shamalyan seems to be best suited for small, intricate films (e.g. Sixth Sense) and not well suited for larger, more conventional films (see Last Airbender).

So if we apply Shamalyan to Lord of the Rings, which is a big story in a big world with big characters (hobbits aside), and approaches it in the same way as Last Airbender then...yeah. Sauron wins.

The Rogue Wolf said:
My Little Pony: Equestrian Girls, directed by David Lynch.
Y'know, after Legend of Everfree, I wouldn't be that opposed to the sub-series having a shakeup...

Of course, as long as Sunset Shimmer gets back to Equestria before the shit hits the fan that is.
 

Extra-Ordinary

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Hawki said:
2) Duncan Jones/Alien

No Duncan, I don't think retconning Alien 3, Alien: Resurrection, and every piece of associated media is a good idea, just so you can "finish Ripley's story." I mean, fine, I like Alien 3 a lot more than a lot of people, but even if I didn't, I wouldn't want it retconned because of your desire to do a fanfic film. And besides, Elysium was lacklustre, and while I hear good things about District 9, that does seem to be a blip in your filmography.

So please, please, just leave the setting alone. :(
Those were Neill Blomkamp, Duncan Jones made Moon and Source Code and Warcraft. A...descending-in-quality list, to be sure (I'm not sure if he would do great with Alien either) but Moon is my favorite movie ever and my inner-fanboy didn't want the director trash-talked on a count of mistaken identity.

Anyway.

Godzilla as made by Nicholas Sparks.
I'd like to make a joke here (as if it didn't write itself) but I've never seen a Nicholas Sparks movie so I'm just gonna picture Godzilla kissing Space-Godzilla in the rain; a picture that probably exists somewhere but I don't actually wanna see it.
 

Smithnikov_v1legacy

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Won't use my favorite IP since it already got mentioned, so I'll use another one...

Tyler Perry does Phantasm.

I dare someone to even TRY that one....
 

Hawki

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Extra-Ordinary said:
Those were Neill Blomkamp, Duncan Jones made Moon and Source Code and Warcraft. A...descending-in-quality list, to be sure (I'm not sure if he would do great with Alien either) but Moon is my favorite movie ever and my inner-fanboy didn't want the director trash-talked on a count of mistaken identity.
Derp, thanks. I've corrected it.
 

09philj

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In the Loop directed by Richard Curtis.

The Rogue Wolf said:
My Little Pony: Equestria Girls, directed by David Lynch.
This sounds fantastic.
 

Neurotic Void Melody

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Apocalypse Now, as directed by Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer (the scary movie genre guys)

Titanic and/or Romeo and Juliet, as directed by M. Night Shamalyan. (Everybody knows how those end. Orrr...doooo theyyyy? ;) )

Taxi Driver, as directed by Dennis Dugan and starring Adam Sandler as De Nero's successor for the main role. (It's not really a low hanging fruit anymore as it has long since fell off the tree, rolled into a dark corner of my cave with its' rotten mates to ferment getting my resident curious rat jazz band drunk and inappropriately lairy all the time whilst I try to hibernate).
 

Saelune

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J.J. Abrams, Star Trek...oh wait.

Favorite IP though is The Elder Scrolls, particularly Morrowind so...

J.J. Abrams.

Seriously, fuck that guy. Michael Bay 2: The Jayening.
 

Hawki

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Xsjadoblayde said:
Titanic and/or Romeo and Juliet, as directed by M. Night Shamalyan. (Everybody knows how those end. Orrr...doooo theyyyy? ;) )
MrCalavera said:
Christopher Nolan on Fallout: The Series
Those don't sound like bad ideas actually.
 

Shoggoth2588

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The Director: Christopher Nolan
The IP: The Punisher
The Reason: Nolan turned Batman into a quitter who took his words of wisdom from the people around him who were clearly smarter than he was. I believe that Nolan would make a Punisher movie in which Frank is only able to take vengeance on organized crime after receiving help from the police people whom the movie is actually about. Also, after he kills Fisk or whomever, Frank will quit being The Punisher because of broody reasons. He might come back in a sequel if he can find a magical knee-brace.

The Director: Zack Snyder
The IP: Blue Beetle
The Reason: Dan Garrick might be the most serious Blue Beetle but he's still a man who wears blue chainmail and punches bank robbers in the face. Ted Kord is a goofball who could easily be re-written to have been in love with Booster Gold. Jaime Reyes is...not necessarily Spider-Man but I wouldn't be surprised to see him written as Spider-Man in a film. What I'm getting at here is that Blue Beetle is a colorful, silly kind of super hero no matter what iteration you're looking at. Zack Snyder has proven that he's incapable of understanding levity.

The Director: Frank Miller
The IP: DC Bombshells
The Reason: I don't want to say that Frank Miller is a sexist hack who can write about as well as he can direct but looking at his body of work, I don't really think I have to say that. DC Bombshells seems like it would be the antithesis of everything Miller has done in the last 15 or so years.

The Director: Micheal Bay
The IP: Hokuto no Ken/ Fist of the North Star
The Reason: Bay might seem like a good fit for HnK at first but keep in mind that there's a difference between exploding machinery and exploding humans. Bay is decent with large-scale destruction loosely tied to a narrative that...exists but Fist of the North Star's violence and explosions are much more violent and much more intimate. What's more, the plot is much more nuanced than Bay would bother with. Peter Jackson in the 1990's would have been perfect for this IP, at least from an effects point of view but out of everybody who might make a live action HnK film, Bay would be my last choice.

The Director: Tim Burton
The IP: Petshop of Horrors
The Reason: Petshop of Horrors is my all-time favorite manga franchise and basically it's a series of short-stories about hubris. They're not all horror stories but they're all really entertaining. Given the subject matter of a lot of the stories, the setting, the characters, I can see Tim Burton jumping in to make a western adaptation of this into a movie or two. As marketable as it could be, as well as it could work, I really really don't want to see a Tim Burton version of this series. The manga is in black-and-white but it's really easy to see a Burton-esq color palette in many of the scenes and creature designs. A part of me would like to see this but I don't think Burton could capture the horror in some of the stories and instead focus on slapstick and the lighter stories; he might hint at the scarier stories and keep spookier motiffs but when Tim Burton Presents Petshop of Horrors, it'll likely just be wacky old Count D (played by Johnny Depp in yellow-face) sells mystical creatures (maybe one or two from the manga but something new will be added to get that sweet Fantastic Beasts money) and spooky shenanigans ensue!
 

Samtemdo8_v1legacy

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Shoggoth2588 said:
The Director: Christopher Nolan
The IP: The Punisher
The Reason: Nolan turned Batman into a quitter who took his words of wisdom from the people around him who were clearly smarter than he was. I believe that Nolan would make a Punisher movie in which Frank is only able to take vengeance on organized crime after receiving help from the police people whom the movie is actually about. Also, after he kills Fisk or whomever, Frank will quit being The Punisher because of broody reasons. He might come back in a sequel if he can find a magical knee-brace.

The Director: Zack Snyder
The IP: Blue Beetle
The Reason: Dan Garrick might be the most serious Blue Beetle but he's still a man who wears blue chainmail and punches bank robbers in the face. Ted Kord is a goofball who could easily be re-written to have been in love with Booster Gold. Jaime Reyes is...not necessarily Spider-Man but I wouldn't be surprised to see him written as Spider-Man in a film. What I'm getting at here is that Blue Beetle is a colorful, silly kind of super hero no matter what iteration you're looking at. Zack Snyder has proven that he's incapable of understanding levity.

The Director: Frank Miller
The IP: DC Bombshells
The Reason: I don't want to say that Frank Miller is a sexist hack who can write about as well as he can direct but looking at his body of work, I don't really think I have to say that. DC Bombshells seems like it would be the antithesis of everything Miller has done in the last 15 or so years.

The Director: Micheal Bay
The IP: Hokuto no Ken/ Fist of the North Star
The Reason: Bay might seem like a good fit for HnK at first but keep in mind that there's a difference between exploding machinery and exploding humans. Bay is decent with large-scale destruction loosely tied to a narrative that...exists but Fist of the North Star's violence and explosions are much more violent and much more intimate. What's more, the plot is much more nuanced than Bay would bother with. Peter Jackson in the 1990's would have been perfect for this IP, at least from an effects point of view but out of everybody who might make a live action HnK film, Bay would be my last choice.

The Director: Tim Burton
The IP: Petshop of Horrors
The Reason: Petshop of Horrors is my all-time favorite manga franchise and basically it's a series of short-stories about hubris. They're not all horror stories but they're all really entertaining. Given the subject matter of a lot of the stories, the setting, the characters, I can see Tim Burton jumping in to make a western adaptation of this into a movie or two. As marketable as it could be, as well as it could work, I really really don't want to see a Tim Burton version of this series. The manga is in black-and-white but it's really easy to see a Burton-esq color palette in many of the scenes and creature designs. A part of me would like to see this but I don't think Burton could capture the horror in some of the stories and instead focus on slapstick and the lighter stories; he might hint at the scarier stories and keep spookier motiffs but when Tim Burton Presents Petshop of Horrors, it'll likely just be wacky old Count D (played by Johnny Depp in yellow-face) sells mystical creatures (maybe one or two from the manga but something new will be added to get that sweet Fantastic Beasts money) and spooky shenanigans ensue!
Almost every WB producer and Zack himself is saying they are gonna add more levity in future movies.

Its gonna suck for me though because that means I have to put up with annoying Goofball characters that I want to hit them in the back of the head for spouting corny and cringy quips and jokes that are not funny :p