Are most relationships vaguely beneficial banality festivals until the warm comfort of a grave?

[Vault101]

Looking again today on my Facebook for more reasons to press my "Nuke everything" button. I saw couplets willing to discuss how lovely the dinner they made each other were and other slightly dull subjects. It seems to me that most relationships are pure dullness based on physical possessions and natural instinct to splurge out horrible children in an overpopulated world.

What I want to know is do you fellow Escapists think that most relationships are circumstance based slogs that are almost painful to watch develop?. I love going out with a girl and having a nice time but as soon as it becomes about Normal matters I am terribly put off. No relationship should be about such attributes but the majority of people will probably say otherwise. All in all are any relationships long lasting with romance or does it end up having to be about instinct or "getting something" over passion?

....ohh boy, an emotionless intellectual arnt YOU special?

anyway I dont give a fuck about the romantic aspects of other peoples love life...I fucking hate anything remotley romatic

but fuck, I know they are madly in love, its somthing you proably cant understand untill you feel it yourself

Im rather "meh" about the relationship thing, only because right now In my current state I dont see myself compatible with anyone,

 

[Dark Knifer]

Some would be, but it depends on the individuals really. Speaking as someone in a relationship, I never once posted anything on it on facebook apart from an update to my relationship status. I see no reason to, why tell the world that when I can just tell her? I agree with trying to show off to other people shows your insecurity in the relationship and you are just denying it to others whereas a truly great relationship will be above that and simply love each other.

I know people in relationships like you described and it really is painful to watch because I just think "You're doing it wrong..." I'd completely agree with you when relationships decay into "normalcy" that it becomes dull but a dynamic relationship should be above that as you always find new ways to love and do things. Physical possessions mean nothing to me in a relationship and the instinct of kids is hardly a basis for a relationship as that is merely an event that takes place for those who chose it. The focus should be on the people themselves and that's all. Hope my incredibly sappy post explains things a little.

 

[Svenparty]

Im rather "meh" about the relationship thing, only because right now In my current state I dont see myself compatible with anyone,

Oh look an angst ridden lonesome wanderer aren't you special!? Ironic cannot begin to describe your post.

It is because I have emotion that I feel this. Otherwise I wouldn't care about maintaining passion and would drift into what most other people have.

 

[derdeutschmachine]

I think it may depend on what people find enjoyment in. My everyday life could consist of going on a long motorcycle ride, going out shooting, causing a ruckus around town by driving my classic firebird. Thankfully I was able to find a woman that shares these and my other interests as well as time spent in the sack.
To say a relationship "decays" into normalcy is a bit of an extreme point of view. People don't do fun things every day, even I, with my interesting hobbies, find it comforting to just chill at the house and eat a nice dinner and watch tv. I would not call my life banal, however, I do admit it can be uneventful.
I'd like to say it comes with a modicom of maturity, but even then it's an issue of viewpoint. If you don't like relationships I guess your best bet is to steer clear of them, but don't automaticly assume that all relationships fall into a blanket definition.

 

[Carbonyl]

Been in a relationship for four years, and no matter how many times we just make dinner together, sit and watch TV, do homework next to each other, or wash dishes....... There is no end of passion. I mean wow, the sex, it is awesome. And spending time together is still fun and exciting and quite often hilarious. The small, normal, pieces are sweet and pleasant and comforting and still full of love; being a "normal" activity does not make it inherently boring. Making dinner with the boyfriend is fun, there's banter and discussion and sometimes dancing. At one point there were swords. A mundane activity is not made more mundane by the addition of another person, especially if you like them. It's not about settling, and it's not about being bored- it's about enjoying each others' company, both in everyday tasks and on special occasions. You don't stay with someone if you don't enjoy their presence, if you like them enough, it doesn't always need to be moonlit sleigh-rides and romantic meetings on the Empire State building.

 

[Vault101]

Im rather "meh" about the relationship thing, only because right now In my current state I dont see myself compatible with anyone,

Oh look an angst ridden lonesome wanderer aren't you special!? Ironic cannot begin to describe your post.

It is because I have emotion that I feel this. Otherwise I wouldn't care about maintaining passion and would drift into what most other people have.

touch'e.......

in regards to other people, how do you know THEY find it as boring as you do? (and of coarse you find other peoples love boring, EVERYONE does) I know alot of people become bored with their relationship, and alot of people dont, we are all different after all

in regards to me Its not angst, I like being single, I also know Im not very socible and selfish with my spare time, its not somthing I stress over (not thease days), Im happy, sure Ill grow sick of it and probably want a relationship or somthing. But right now Im enjoying the wonders of disposable income and not having anyone else to annoy me

 

[FernandoV]

Maybe it's called "growing up"...

Banality is being grown up? Please elaborate, personally it's the most depressing thing in the entire world if you think your main purpose with a person is to impregnate/become impregnated and spend the rest of the time dull as a rock.

Because that's the only type of relationship people have. Cynicism is nice when you balance it with good reason. There are people out there that genuinely like being with each other. If you haven't found that, join the club, but don't pretend to understand it by grouping everyone into your miserable view on it.

 

[ReservoirAngel]

Watching relationships from the outside is always akin to watching two lobotomised sheep trying to mount each other. At least for me it is. You just realise all the stupid shit they do that the people in the relationship gloss over because, and here's the crucial thing: they either really like each other, or they love each other.

When you're in a relationship it all makes infinitely much more sense. I'm pretty sure that to the outside world me and my boyfriend look like a couple of fucking morons together, but it doesn't matter when you're in love. Love paves over all manner of sins.

And fyi, a relationship often isn't there for the strict purpose of getting the female involved pregnant. To think that is a wholly depressing mentality to have. Relationships exist to give people a sense of intimate companionship, someone they can share their lives with. Fact is, with most relationships children do occur, yes. But that's not the reason. People aren't just procreation-seeking missiles.

Plus to assume that every relationship is only there to reproduce is disregarding all the same-sex couples in the world.

 

[Svenparty]

Watching relationships from the outside is always akin to watching two lobotomised sheep trying to mount each other. At least for me it is. You just realise all the stupid shit they do that the people in the relationship gloss over because, and here's the crucial thing: they either really like each other, or they love each other.

When you're in a relationship it all makes infinitely much more sense. I'm pretty sure that to the outside world me and my boyfriend look like a couple of fucking morons together, but it doesn't matter when you're in love. Love paves over all manner of sins.

And fyi, a relationship often isn't there for the strict purpose of getting the female involved pregnant. To think that is a wholly depressing mentality to have. Relationships exist to give people a sense of intimate companionship, someone they can share their lives with. Fact is, with most relationships children do occur, yes. But that's not the reason. People aren't just procreation-seeking missiles.

Plus to assume that every relationship is only there to reproduce is disregarding all the same-sex couples in the world.

While this is true, certainly the majority of the population do desire to have children at some stage and can be the make or break in a relationship. I'm slightly comforted by the points put across but at the same time I'm getting a "Ignorance is bliss vibe" that I should just not think too much about why and lobotomise my inner sheep.

 

[aegix drakan_v1legacy]

OP...you seem to be overlooking the fact that single people worry about more or less the same things (jobs, food, etc). When you're in a relationship, you then have two people talking about those things (instead of there being just one person thinking about it), which bring more attention to them.

Also, relationships aren't all about having kids. Personally, I don't think I ever want kids. Too much freakin work!

It's called life, and life is hell, nice of you to notice.

That quote works so well with your Shikemaru avatar that it is now made of win. XD

 

[Chemical Alia]

You have to do "normal" things like getting oil changes and cooking meals and doing your taxes whether you're in a relationship with someone or not. It's what adults independent of their parents have to do. I don't see how discussing these things is somehow a breaking point for you.

 

[Esotera]

Relationships are based primarily on food & sex, then after that companionship. None of those things are particularly interesting to me unless the person is very unique.

So the answer to your question is yes.