IceStar100 said:
Lucius Ivanov said:
IceStar100 said:
OpiateChicken said:
It's depressing as f***, but that conversation is between me and my psychiatrist =P.
That should be your opening line to every girl.
I will say this first. I going to be honest and I'm not good at surgery coating stuff so if I sound like an ass or I insult I wish to say I'm sorry that not my intent. That goes to anyone reading this.
Now before you start dating you got to get your shit together. Don't worry about it so much that it become a drive. Look around at how many people are 30 have kids and a failed marriage. Don't look for a girlfriend/wife look for a friend.
Now as far as money goes don't worry about it. Go do what you do day to day and look around and see who there. Those are the girls who will be the one who last with you. basically don't have a goal just be you.
The trouble with sites is your working on a picture and a paragraph. OR what someone else think makes a match (eHarmony) Sometimes it happened. The main trouble with dating sites are people are looking for love not looking for people they like. A lot of these girls see all these choices they have and end a relationship for the slightest trouble be cause they think they have endless choices. Or you get the girls reaching 40 and who have hit desperation because we are told we must be married or there something wrong with us. So they move way to fast. That's just some of the girl I have found.
That all said good luck man this is all what life has shown me you might draw a whole new set of card to play. As the saying goes plenty of fish in the sea. I find that some of those fish are sharks and piranhas. Look at it like this why do the day to day guys she meet not want her. There's a reason she had to resort to a dating web site. It may be just luck on where she lives and not a lot of choice.
Just my opinion, but I think your priorities are a bit out of touch. You pretty much need to have a job if you're not in full-time classes somewhere. A lot of NEET people I know say there are no jobs around here, either--but they just mean there are no jobs they LIKE. Bottom line is, fast food places, cleaning services, etc. are always going to have a high turnover rate and lots of staff. If you're desperate for money, there is no shame in working a job like that. You don't need to think of it as a career, or a failing--it is just a job to help you get on your feet and get established, and to help you get closer to your goals.
Speaking of that, if you don't have goals... get some. Even if you're not sure you'll keep them, have them temporarily and work towards them. Girls love it when a guy is working towards something. I can kind of identify with you here a bit because from the ages of about 20-24, I had no idea what I wanted to do at all and was miserable pretty much all the time. Waking up each day and laying in bed without a sense of purpose is severely depressing and takes a lot to get over.
I personally am still working towards my goals and it will be a while before I get there, but I know I can get there if I work hard enough, am persistent enough, and keep improving myself. And when I get it, my career of choice, oh god will it be sweet. But just that feeling of having a drive, a path to follow--that is HUGE and brought me out of any depression I may have been in. And, to get back to the main point, girls will automatically see that attitude in you and be attracted to you just for that. A lot of girls need and want security in their lives and even just having a boyfriend who they believe is going places will stick them to you like a magnet.
Beware though: some of these girls will be leeches and will just use your success to fulfill their own selfish desires, and have no goals or ambitions themselves. They are toxic and will bring you down, and then once you're down they'll leave you for someone else.
The important thing is that, once you've got these goals and are following a defined path towards them, whether that be courses at school, training, apprenticeships, physical training, a language, related experience, whatever--you will have automatically moved up at least one "league", the ones people talk about when they say "she's out of my league". The fact is that when you're driven, you become happier. Happiness leads to confidence and not giving a fuck about small things. Confidence (and hard work) lead to success, and success leads to attractiveness.
First though: you need to either get a job where you are, or find a way to save up a bit of cash, go to Barcelona if need be, and work your way up from there. Once you have a bit of financial freedom you can choose what to do with your relationship time. Relationships are a whole other story, but this post is mainly focused on the attraction component and on getting your shit together.
Good luck
