Autism. Do you think it is a blessing or a curse?

[CrazyGirl17]

I was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome back when no one knew what it was, and for me... eh, in my opinion, it's neither a blessing or a curse, but somewhere in between. I've... er... had some problems in dealing with social situations, not to mention some stress issues.

On the other hand, I was lucky enough to get involved with several groups for young adults with Autism, and I've had some good experiences there. I've even made some great friends... though out of the people I consider my close friends, most of them are on the Autistic scale. Not sure if that's good or not...

Also, I have little tolerance for people who use Autism as an excuse to be an asshole. Stop ruining it for the rest of us damnit!

 

[TakerFoxx]

I think you misunderstood me. I said "relationships" as in, all relationships. Not just the romantic or sexual, I meant friendships and such. Platonic things. I wasn't even thinking about the whole "girlfriend" thing.

I have maybe two actual friends outside of work, and they both live out of state. I never call them and only text them like maybe once in half a year, if that. And it takes me forever to respond in the rare times that they text me (it helps that they're autistic themselves, so they understand how I am). I never hang out with co-workers outside of work, and even if one that I liked leaves or gets fired, I usually forget them that same week. I rarely contact my family members, spend pretty much all my time alone, and so long as I'm just honest and open about not wanting to be around others, I've found that people don't care.

Again, just own it. Don't take yourself too seriously, don't look down on others, and don't feel like others are looking down on you. As for the ego thing, hey, I got a HUGE ego, almost to narcissistic levels, I admit it. But since I don't want to come off as a jerk, I just exaggerate it to comical levels so people think of me as a joker instead of pretentious. It's all about the way you carry yourself.

 

[Borty The Bort]

Put it this way, you probably lack the fundamental tools to accomplish many things people consider important. You are cool with that...which in the eyes of many will only make you even more worth of pity...and they may consider you delusional. .

What do you exactly mean by this?
Why should I want to accomplish things that other people see as important?
They are other people, as in, not me. Unless you tell me exactly what you by this, I'm afraid I cannot answer what you mean by this. Unless that is what you intended, so I cannot refute your statement. How convenient for you. Perhaps some clarification for me, if you please?

 

[Lieju]

Speaking as an autistic person... I like being me, I wouldn't be me without being autistic, so...
I wouldn't be as obsessed with things I like without it, plus having empathy and caring about people's useless opinions sounds annoying and I am friends with cool autistic people (including my gf who is great and who I probably wouldn't have fallen in love with if we weren't both autistic).

Lot of the problems I have are not because of autism itself, but because it clashes with the society. Me being unable to recognize faces, having auditory processing issues, hating being touched and going non verbal sometimes would be far less of an issue if people weren't jerks about it.

 

[Elijin]

I think we have a lot of fortunate people on these forums, and being happy and/or content with who you are and what hand you're dealt in life is a great thing.

That said, due to all of these personal perspectives from relatively healthy people is skewering the issue. The only person I know in person with autism literally cannot function independently. He cannot fend for himself. He wouldn't even be able to communicate his thoughts on a forum. So it's definitely a curse.

So yeah, positivity and acceptance are great, but don't lose sight of the fact you got the lucky draw of an unlucky situation, so to speak.

 

[TakerFoxx]

I think we have a lot of fortunate people on these forums, and being happy and/or content with who you are and what hand you're dealt in life is a great thing.

That said, due to all of these personal perspectives from relatively healthy people is skewering the issue. The only person I know in person with autism literally cannot function independently. He cannot fend for himself. He wouldn't even be able to communicate his thoughts on a forum. So it's definitely a curse.

So yeah, positivity and acceptance are great, but don't lose sight of the fact you got the lucky draw of an unlucky situation, so to speak.

Very true. At the high functioning levels, you only get some quirks and a few additional challenges, and those quirks can actually be benefits if you channel them correctly. But that doesn't change the fact that it's still a disorder that can seriously fuck you up.

 

[bartholen_v1legacy]

Well how do you even respond? I can't imagine wanting to have autism now, but if I had it, I wouldn't see the world in any other way than through the filter of autism. It's not something you contract like a disease. I'd consider it a curse purely on the basis that society, social interaction and people's expectations about other people are based on the assumption that the person they're speaking to is non-autistic. That means having to put extra effort in to learn and actively try to pick up on social ticks as opposed to growing into and detecting them naturally. So if you're autistic and don't go out of your way to tell that to people you meet for the first time, their first response to your possible awkwardness or some other kind of differing behavior (like lack of social tact) is most likely "what an asshole" or "is this guy drunk?", or something similar in that vein.

 

[Phasmal]

I don't think there's anything wrong with people who are autistic finding good things in that and being allowed to be who they are.

However, it's something that can seriously impact people's lives. That there are a lot of "high-functioning" autistic people doesn't outweigh the fact that some people are going to require support for their entire lives because of autism.

It's kind of like... I have a hearing impairment, but it would be wrong of me to argue that deafness is a blessing. Other hard of hearing people are entitled to feel however they want about it. Just because I personally am not that affected by it doesn't stop it from being something that can affect someone's life in a big way.

 

[Eclipse Dragon]

A little of column A, and little of column B.
One of my dearest friends is Autistic (Aspergers, mid to high functioning).
Most of his difficulty in life [footnote](I've known him since he was very little)[/footnote] doesn't come from his autism, but rather society's inability to understand it, teach students with it or really even try. Schools are only just starting to learn how to properly handle Dyslexia, good luck with autism.

His home life was shit because his parents never thought he'd ever amount to anything (because of his Autism), so they never bothered to work with him. They put him on disability and resigned themselves to the idea that he'd always live at home and never work. They became verbally abusive and saw him as a burden, killed his self esteem.

Thankfully the internet exists and he got help. He was able to learn in his own way, all the things he needed for which to function in society. He was able to get all his important documents, a full time job and his own place. The only thing he really needed was people to have a little faith in him. He's very creative and really good at remembering random facts, a few talents, the company he works for was able to recognize and make full use of.

I've actually asked him this question before and he says he wouldn't be himself without his autism, that for good or bad, it's part of who he is. He tends to be against the idea of "curing" autism in the philosophy of organizations such as Autism Speaks. He doesn't like the notion that other people pity him or see him as defective.

That doesn't mean those who seriously need help shouldn't be able to get it, but so far the way society as a whole views and goes about it, is not very effective.

 

[Samtemdo8_v1legacy]

I have Asperger Syndrome aswell.

One example of my symdrome is lets say this:

I look at a person making a facial expression, I tend to amuse myself by replicating it.

Other example is like plain food for the most part. Like I just have Cheeseburger, I don't put anything else on it because it feels like a mess to me.

But in the end often I don't even care I have Aspeger's Syndrome.

 

[Specter Von Baren]

At work so I can't go too in depth but I just wanted to point out that Aspergers is high functioning autism, not low functioning.

 

[Borty The Bort]

At work so I can't go too in depth but I just wanted to point out that Aspergers is high functioning autism, not low functioning.

My mistake. I keep messing it up

 

[Frankster]

Everyone's a little different but in my case it was definitly a curse.
And that's more then i'm willing to share about myself on this topic because frankly, i wouldn't trust most escapists with personal stuff.

people who were unable to pursue their dreams due to their autism or simply felt incredibly distressed because they felt different and unable to interact with other people at a level they were satisfied with.

Sounds about right for me, though in my case i'd be loathe to blame it entirely for my failings, that would just be too easy, i'd blame my own personality and character for at least 40% of it. But it sure did lay the groundwork for a life of fail and uphill struggles to be "normal".

 

[happyninja42]

I've never known anyone with a severe case of it, but I've known a few with either a mild case of the condition, or perhaps aspergers. And while they do tend to have a common trait of high intelligence, and analytical thinking, they both have some major social problems, when dealing with people, and/or unfamiliar/new situations.

I wouldn't call it a "blessing" or "curse", but I would say it's a problem, and possibly a disability to some degree. Because life involves dealing with social situations, and dealing with people, new people, and new situations. And that seems to be a major problem for people with these conditions, my friends included. And since they suffer from the side effects of poor social skills, it does have a negative impact on their lives, and thus, in my mind, that's the definition of a disability.

 

[QuiteEnjoyed2016]

My old boss has a quite heavily autistic son and it is a horrific burden on him and a terrifying worry for the mother, who (sadly pretty reasonably) fears for what will happen to him when they are not around. I really don't think any benefits outweigh to cost to families and the individual. It is very much a disability from where I'm standing.

 

[Saulkar]

A blessing (as an adult) and if someone so much as came near me with a needle with the magic elixir to cure me they would eat pavement. Since that is likely to never happen it is something we never have to worry about (barring nano machine son). It allows me a small but highly developed selection of talents that I can freely expand. A severely reduced capacity to feel exertion which has allowed me to train at an abnormally intense level and excel as a competitive powerlifter. And while I lack empathy I have become hypersensitive as a result to social queues, facial expressions, and tone/inflection that while I do not understand them I can easily contextualise them in order to figure out if I am being lied to or manipulated (even if I do not know how). My hypersensitive touch, taste, and sight have all benefited my pursuits as an athlete and an artist. Same goes for my hearing when it comes to playing piano or listening to music. Furthermore, I can remember the most esoteric trivia with such clarity that it sometimes scares me as well. Did not help me study in school though.

I still struggle with many things that I will not go into detail on here but I would not change me for any reason. My childhood was fucking hell but I feel that has both made me a much more sensitive and thoughtful soul.

 

[sageoftruth]

I was diagnosed with a light case of it. As others have said, it can benefit you, but also the opposite. However, depending on how serious it is, the problems can easily outweigh the benefits.

I can't speak for everyone, or even for most people with it. I was pretty lucky, getting nothing more than borderline asperger syndrome, which I overcame to a large degree thanks to my desire to connect with others as well as plenty of support from my parents. After going from being the guy people pity to the guy people want to spend time with, it felt a lot more like a blessing rather than a curse. After all, once you overcome the issues of autism, you're left with nothing but the benefits.

Still, I've been in contact with others who have it as well, and when I see how debilitating conditions like low-functioning autism can be for some people, I don't feel confident going out and saying "Don't worry. You'll overcome it! After all, I did." If it reaches the point where you cannot even have a normal conversation with other people, then it starts to feel more like a curse.