Back to Britain!

[thylasos]

Alright, chaps? I'm heading back to dear old Blighty tomorrow after 9 months in Mother Russia, and I'm looking for suggestions of the most typically English things I can fill my first few days with.

That is to say, before I once again revert to my normal status as your everyday cynical and jaded Brit who loves nothing more than our national pastime of complaining that "this country has gone to the dogs!"

Suggestions?

 

[rabidmidget]

Get used to eating greasy fish and chips

Appear to be good but turn out to be the bad guy in the end

Get beaten by Australia in sports

Wear a monocle

 

[manaman]

Wear a monocle

I want to wear a monocle, but sadly even with the top hat I still am treated most oddly when I don said monocle.

As for what to do in the country I am sorry to say that out of all the places in the world I have visited that country is not on the list.

 

[ottenni]

Get beaten by Australia in sports

Damn straight.

Eat a crumpet and talk about the weather.

 

[TimeLord]

Drink tea

Eat crumpets

Wear a top hat and monocle

Learn how to queue

*Opens time window with a kettle and some string*

And open time windows with a kettle and some string

 

[Plinglebob]

Drink tea

Eat crumpets

Don't forget complain about the weather no matter what.

Oh, and have some fish and chips. I know this is stupid, but do any other country have fish and chips like we do?

 

[SmartIdiot]

Have a nice warm ale(yuck),

Don't forget complain about the weather no matter what.

yep, can't forget that great British past time. Also, try sampling the mile-long dole queues but steer clear of the knife crime.

 

[Layz92]

Depression (weather, economy, food you decide) then alcohol then an enraged soccer based riot... the order is up to you though really.

 

[Fulax]

Be irrationally optimistic about our chances in the World Cup, but secretly hope we get knocked out in the quarter finals on penalties, just so you can complain about it.

 

[King of the Sandbox]

Get back to complaining about us loud, fat Americans with the rest of the world?

Wait, you could do that in Russia, I guess.

I got nothin'. Sorry.

 

[gellert1984]

I got back from a trip to holland not long ago, first thing I did was stop at a service station for a full english breakfast and steaming mug of cow-juiced tea.

 

[Distorted Stu]

As soon as the sun comes out, fire up a bbq and then complain about how there never is enough sun.

 

[thiosk]

drink wodka thats been cut with antifreeze!

wait wrong migration direction

 

[Riobux]

Complain.

That's all you need to do.

 

[wooty]

Full English brekkie, always the best thing after being abroad for a long spell.

You could also take up what seems to be the new national passtime, which is cramming 5-7 guys in a vauxhall nova with their shirts off while driving round listening to *dumsh dumsh dumsh dumsh dumsh dumsh dumsh dumsh*. Far too much of this around recently

 

[CakeDragon]

Watch Monty Python
Wear a suit and bowler hat
Get stuck on the congestion roads in London
Visit Primark
Have a cup of brew
Have scones with jam and clotted cream
Join a queue

 

[Megalodon]

Get beaten by Australia in sports

I'm sorry, who holds the ashes?

Drink Tea, much, much Tea.

 

[fd18e3d0-816e-11e4-b4a9-0800200c9a66]

Anyone who isn't british reading this will think us brits just sit around wearing silly eye wear, drinking tea and complaining. Oh wait...

 

[SonicWaffle]

Get beaten by Australia in sports

First post contains epic win

Epic and innacurate, two-for-one! I do believe we gave them a good, stiff rogering in the cricket last week, although opinion is divided on whether that counts as a sport...

OT: Drink too much, have underage sex, commit knife crimes, be unreasonably racist in pubs and assume anyone darker than you is a "terrorist muslim", complain about Americans, be unduly optimistic about our chances in the World Cup, and go on Jeremy Kyle. That about covers it.