Best Way To Make A Telemarketer Rage Quit

[EMFCRACKSHOT]

I like to play System of A Down: Cigaro
The first line is "My cock is much bigger than yours"
They hang up and feel inadequate. its great.

Spoiler: Just to warn you, there is a cartoon penis in this video

 

[Steel Ronin]

1.Hello can you tell me about the(close phone right now)
2.???????
3???????????????????????
4.Profit

 

[Erja_Perttu]

My mother just yells 'noooooooooo!' down the phone and hangs up, my father tries to be nice to them and ends up just having a good old chat, my sister pretends to be Chinese and insulted/insulting.

I myself prefer my friend's approach. 'Look, if you aren't selling me pizza, I don't want it'.

 

[Cosplay Horatio]

I play either one of these when I get phone bashers until they hang up.

Spoiler: Galenskaparna - Linus på linjen

Spoiler: Rawr Bomb

 

[Broady Brio]

Pretend you're getting chased by a murderer.

 

[Mr.Squishy]

There is these comic strips in Norway called "Pondus", and once he got called by telemarketers, and he farted into the phone. Inspired by that one, I did it to an unlucky telemarketer too (Yes, immature, I know.), I've never been called since that.

XD another norwegian and pondus fan! sweet!
OT: All the good ones are taken, although on a slightly different note I once verbally crushed some jehova's witnesses that came to my door.

 

[MadMechanic]

*After the 'this is being recorded spiel'
"Yes, well I think it's only right to tell you that I'm taping this for training purposes too! Don't you put me on hold...I put you on hold!" And start singing something, very badly down the phone.

Pretended that I don't speak english. After a while, I couldn't hold the accent anymore, so reverted to my faux upper-class twit accent and said "oh, I'm terrebwe sowee, I just can't hold this charade up any longer..." That got some laughs.

I've done the "let me call you at home later" trick.

"Are you the home owner?" -'With this squeaky teen voice? Not likely...'
Anyone heard of the really old radio show the Goons? Well, I do a good impersonation of Eccles, Moriarity, and Gryd-pype. So, by moving the phone around, I pretended to have a convo between them.

The best though? My phone company called me in a lesson at school. So, I handed it to my teacher. Who then (lied) and told the telemarketer that I'd just had my phone confiscated for a month, and just been given a Saturday detention for my phone going off. That teacher was ace

 

[Insanum]

16. Tell the Telemarketer, "Okay, I will listen to you. But I should probably tell you, I'm not wearing any clothes."

All of your suggestions are made of Win. But that one REALLY made me lol.

---

I used to work in a callcentre (Not could calling, Was car insurance claimline, so people called us when they crashed) But when i had to ring people regarding the crash people assumed i was a cold caller. Some people really treat cold callers like crap, Although i just hang up on Indian cold callers - Especially because they are ALWAYS called Mike. They're as much as a Mike as I am an Abdul.

 

[Aesir23]

Telemarketer: Hello this is XXXX from XXXX. Is this James ----?
My gf at the time: (makes suggestive moaning and such in the background)
Me: Yes it is. What can I do for you? Oh Uh hold up a second.(Lets out a loud groan)
Telemarketer: Ummm oh is this a bad time?
Me: What? No you probably caught me at the best time possible.(stiffled laughter in the background)
Telemarketer: *hangs up*

XD If I had a boyfriend I would definitely try that the next time a telemarketer calls.