Blatant Lies
- Thread starter Redlin5_v1legacy
- Start date
Recommended Videos
I want to stay at home forever and not move out because all the deals I can get are pretty shit.
Minecraft is a bad game. I wish the graphics were just a bit worse, and that it didn't run on anything other than Java.
Please take this news with the seriousness that it deserves.
I have recently come across one of what will surely the most shocking news stories of this year.
The alarming and frankly imposing nature of this report is one of which that should require all future news on this distressing matter to display a full discloser so as not spread undue fear into the elderly, the weak of heart and the poor unprepared souls of our very earth. You have been warned!
Government funded scientists and leading experts in multiple fields have discovered that at the end of the year of our lord 2012 there will be a world wide bacon shortage affecting all fried pig loving countries in both the southern and northern hemispheres.
Police are suspecting riots and suicide rates to at least double maybe even triple; while butchers and meat distributors have been inundated by manic customers buying all manner of pork related products.
This is not, what most have begun to believe, the sign of the first stage of the Aztec apocalypse. Nor is it what some conspiracy based news outlets are calling a hoax to boost bacon sales.
We, my friends, are all doomed.
Vegetarians have been telling us this for years.
Australia's official butcher envoy to the UN 'Michael Spearos' has been quoted as saying;
"We are currently at peak bacon. All emergency supplies have been opened and we are looking into green options to elevate some of the stress on the supply chain."
But these 'green options' such as tofu and imitation spam are only an drop in the ocean and neither of these are developed enough to solve the crisis we now face.
The signs have always been there; the Spanish inquisition; World war two; Skrillex's Emmy. All of these should have been warnings to us that the great bacon drought was coming.
If you are still reading this and have not been driven insane by your Conscious's outright refusal to processes this information please be strong; The world needs you
I have recently come across one of what will surely the most shocking news stories of this year.
The alarming and frankly imposing nature of this report is one of which that should require all future news on this distressing matter to display a full discloser so as not spread undue fear into the elderly, the weak of heart and the poor unprepared souls of our very earth. You have been warned!
Government funded scientists and leading experts in multiple fields have discovered that at the end of the year of our lord 2012 there will be a world wide bacon shortage affecting all fried pig loving countries in both the southern and northern hemispheres.
Police are suspecting riots and suicide rates to at least double maybe even triple; while butchers and meat distributors have been inundated by manic customers buying all manner of pork related products.
This is not, what most have begun to believe, the sign of the first stage of the Aztec apocalypse. Nor is it what some conspiracy based news outlets are calling a hoax to boost bacon sales.
We, my friends, are all doomed.
Vegetarians have been telling us this for years.
Australia's official butcher envoy to the UN 'Michael Spearos' has been quoted as saying;
"We are currently at peak bacon. All emergency supplies have been opened and we are looking into green options to elevate some of the stress on the supply chain."
But these 'green options' such as tofu and imitation spam are only an drop in the ocean and neither of these are developed enough to solve the crisis we now face.
The signs have always been there; the Spanish inquisition; World war two; Skrillex's Emmy. All of these should have been warnings to us that the great bacon drought was coming.
If you are still reading this and have not been driven insane by your Conscious's outright refusal to processes this information please be strong; The world needs you