WOPR said:
Flare Phoenix said:
WOPR said:
Flare Phoenix said:
Any girl who lists reasons why they would so obviously want you, and then follows it with a declaration that they don't want you even though you never asked them if they did want you is a presumptious *****.
I did tell them I like them
then they go into that long rant
and it has happened EVERY time
...friends or not
and if we weren't friends we become friends from it
so what have I learned?
Tell the girl you like here and you're friends for life
Well then maybe the problem is with you. I don't know, but bitching to a group of strangers on the internet isn't going to help matters. Why do people think there is some magical solution out there to get girls that they just were never taught... like there was a "How to get Girls 101" lesson in school they somehow missed?
umm... not trying to "whine"
trying to explain when things are asked
the primary question still stands
"Are there any other people that have been in this situation, or do I just suck at life?"
I'd say maybe it is with me, but (not trying to sound full of myself) I am a good person... sure I'm not uber beefy, and I'm a bit on the nerdy side, but so what?
anyways
see question
now to make this funny
blurrrrrrrraaaaaaaaaaaaaa- *choking sounds*
So maybe other people have the same issue. It's really not relevant. What seems to be bothering you is that your friends seem to want you as a friend, while you want more.
Maybe you need to be more overt about what you actually want from a woman. No girl's going to come jump into your arms and say "You're wonderful, be mine!" Whether you like it or not, the social norm for Western society is that the guy does the initial pursuing, while the girl responds.
What DO you want from girls? It doesn't seem to be friendship, otherwise you'd be ok with them telling you that you're nice and would be good for an intimate relationship with someone else. You'd probably think, "Oh, how good that they are clarifying that we are both just friends. That's exactly what I wanted".
I assume what you want then is a relationship. Are you pursuing that goal? Or are you hoping one of the girls you know casually will magically turn into a girlfriend? It takes effort to get to know someone; and bravery. Don't think girls don't notice how much it takes for you to gather up the courage to ask them out; a lot of them do. And if they're not interested, they may feel pretty bad about saying no.
I guess what I'm trying to say is: when you get to know girls "just as a friend", but with a hidden agenda of wanting a relationship, you are basically lying to the people you're hanging out with. A better plan may be to try to hang out in mixed groups, get to know girls as friends in a friends setting, and if you meet one you click with, ask her out on a date. That way, both of you know where you stand.
You say you are a nice guy. You also say people are backing you up on that statement. So why are you unhappily asking for support over the internet? Do you think you're nice, really? Because if you did, maybe you wouldn't be spending so much time sitting on the net talking about how you haven't got a girl and more time hanging out with real people, or even on dates. With a girl.
