Canvey Island school bans triangle shaped flapjacks, health and safety hazard

[Dragoon]

So I just read this article on the BBC News site

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-essex-21923218

Basically some kid threw a triangular shaped flapjack and hurt another kid. So they were then deemed a health and safety hazard and are now only allowed to be square or rectangular.

This has to be one of the most idiotically pointless things I've ever read, there is no logical explanation for why triangular shaped baked goods are more dangerous than square or rectangular ones. Hell they have one more corner to cause damage with so if anything they are more dangerous.

This whole child safety thing is just getting ridiculous now, parents need to stop wrapping there kids in bubble wrap and let em learn themselves.

Thoughts?

 

[teqrevisited]

I did laugh about them only being allowed to make them square or rectangular for the same reason. Surely triangular ones are 'safer'. Then I realize the madness of debating the safety issues concerning flapjacks.

I think logic is lost on those kinds of people.

 

[ShiningAmber]

Some kid in the states got suspended for a poptart in the shape of a gun. The school's reason for the suspension was that it would give time to his parents to learn to be better parents.

This world.

l.o.l.

 

[Dragoon]

Some kid in the states got suspended for a poptart in the shape of a gun. The school's reason for the suspension was that it would give time to his parents to learn to be better parents.

This world.

l.o.l.

Wow that's almost as bad.

 

[Bertylicious]

You lot laugh but when I was taking my GCSEs in secondry school the entirety of year 7 was wiped out by triangular flapjacks. They hadn't been about long enough for any of us to consider them "real" people so we weren't too affected, though there was this guy called John Bateman, who we used to call Master Bateman, that lost a brother to it and he was in bits. He got out of doing cross-country for a week so it was alright in the end for him.

Anyway, flapjacks are not a food to be treated lightly.

 

[GiantRaven]

With one square piece of flapjack, I can create two triangular pieces of devastating destructive glory, thus doubling my capability for injuring others.

I see no problem here.

 

[Dragoon]

With one square piece of flapjack, I can create two triangular pieces of devastating destructive glory, thus doubling my capability for injuring others.

I see no problem here.

...this is genius, how did I not think of this.

 

[Melon Hunter]

Given this paragraph from the article:

A spokesman for the Health and Safety Executive said: "We often come across half-baked decisions taken in the name of health and safety, but this one takes the biscuit."

I'd love to believe this was an April Fool's joke accidentally published a week early, but it's probably not. The Health & Safety Executive must tear their hair out over cases like this. However, as a budding entrepreneur, I can now make a killing selling flapjack-proof ballistic goggles! £25 a pair and guaranteed to stop any high-velocity baked product, triangular or otherwise!

 

[Bertylicious]

With one square piece of flapjack, I can create two triangular pieces of devastating destructive glory, thus doubling my capability for injuring others.

I see no problem here.

Truly, only a maniac could conceive of such feindish geometry.

They will have to be mashed and combined with water to make a kind of paste. It is the only way to protect the children.

 

[Phasmal]

Am I the only one thinking of getting three triangle flapjacks and making a delicious Triforce?

I want flapjacks now.

OT: Well... isn't that silly.

 

[Ickorus]

I brought triangular flapjacks to work today because of this, what can I say, I like to live dangerously.

OT: If you put your mind to it, with a little bit of belief and perseverence anything can be turned into a deadly weapon.

Now, I'm off to shank someone with a pancake.

 

[Colour Scientist]

You lot laugh but when I was taking my GCSEs in secondry school the entirety of year 7 was wiped out by triangular flapjacks. They hadn't been about long enough for any of us to consider them "real" people so we weren't too affected, though there was this guy called John Bateman, who we used to call Master Bateman, that lost a brother to it and he was in bits. He got out of doing cross-country for a week so it was alright in the end for him.

Anyway, flapjacks are not a food to be treated lightly.

I remember hearing about that in the news.
Devastating stuff, we have a national ban on all triangular shaped foods and I think it's for the best. Personally, I lost my friend, Ben Dover, to a Dorito a few years ago. It was a very difficult time.

 

[Stasisesque]

I believe it's a health and safety violation to be serving flapjacks in the first place. Those things are disgusting, and they take ages to chew. For the rest of the school day you've got bits of oats stuck in your teeth, it's just terrible.

And if you bring a toothbrush and floss to school, people mock you.

I don't miss school.

 

[Esotera]

Well there goes my business for shuriken-based biscuits. At this rate they will ban pens in school (which is probably a good idea because someone in my year was blinded by one).

 

[The Artificially Prolonged]

But wait square flapjacks have more corners than triangle ones!!! The damn school administration has just put those poor kids in even deadlier peril than they where in before!

 

[an annoyed writer]

Wait, what? SERIOUSLY? I just rolled off of my bed laughing my ass off at the thought of that. This sounds like something that came straight out of a South Park episode. Next thing we know, some kid will throw the square ones at another kid and then they will have to be circular for safety's sake. then, It'll happen again and they'll either make it a ball, or a puddle of liquified mass that was once a flapjack.

 

[JaceArveduin]

You know, this topic makes slightly more sense when you realize the Brit's flapjacks are actually some sort of oat-bar thing. Round my parts it's just a rarely used word for pancakes.

 

[ABLb0y]

Some kid in the states got suspended for a poptart in the shape of a gun. The school's reason for the suspension was that it would give time to his parents to learn to be better parents.

This world.

l.o.l.

Think that's bad? Another school in the states suspended two children for doing the 'finger-gun' thing.