Coping with depression

[Bleidd Whitefalcon]

Brief backstory here - I'm a long time sufferer of depression (something along the lines of 10, 11 years). I've been able to deal with it for a while but it's just starting to wear me down and I'm pretty close to the end of my rope. How do you guys cope?

Captcha: face the music

Captcha, you do realize that if I do that, I'll probably end up dead, right?

If I accidentally put this in the wrong place, feel free to move it

 

[Eclipse Dragon]

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Do you go to therapy? If you don't that might be a good place to start.
Depending on how depressed you are, it would be difficult for me to give you proper advice.

Personally I hang out with people I love on a regular basis, maybe even more so than I typically would (because I'm introverted), I force myself to do those things I used to enjoy (drawing, playing video games, watching Disney movies), if I can, I do those activities with other people, I have a very close friend whom I talk to on a regular basis and can confide in, even if all I'm capable of describing is "I feel sad". I get a solid 8 hours of sleep every night regardless of weekday or weekend, on the weekdays, I try to go to bed at the same time every night so my body follows a sleep schedule. I have a very affectionate cat with recent medical issues, who I baby constantly. I also try to help people when I can.

I've heard exercise helps, but I'm lazy and can't dedicate my time to that without finding some way to include it in my regular activities, so I don't realize I'm exercising.

Also... is your avatar Morpheus? That's awesome.

 

[Legion]

I think depression is too personal and sensitive a subject for us to give you advice on how to "cope" with it. Even with the best of intentions, or with advice given from personal experience, we could end up making things worse with our suggestions if you followed them. Different people cope in different ways.

First and foremost, it is almost certainly the best idea to speak to a doctor. Patient-Doctor confidentiality is absolute, and they won't judge you for it. They are the only person who is qualified to give you proper advice on the problem. They are the person who is also best able to decide what kind of treatment may help you.


The three main treatments for depression are:

Medication. Obviously prescribed by a doctor and nobody else. This is more likely to be given if the depression isn't caused by a specific cause (such as bereavement).

Counselling. Normally given to people who have suffered trauma of some kind or another, but it is also used for many other reasons as well.

Cognitive Behavioural Therapy. This is a somewhat practical way of dealing with depression. It's aim is to try and alter the thought processes that cause the depression.

As mentioned above, a doctor is the only person who can truly advise what may help, you should never self prescribe treatment.

There are also some links in this thread, that may help you. Your profile doesn't state where you are from, so I am uncertain of whether or not they are relevant to you personally, but it's worth a look at least.

If you feel that talking to somebody about it may help, feel free to PM me and I will respond as and when I can.

 

[teisjm]

Realise the following things:

1. If you rage-quit on life, you're fucking up your family for life.
2. Now that rage-quitting is hopefully out of the question, you have a long life ahead of you.
3. things will not get better by waiting around. find a way to improve your situation, or turn your life more towards stuff that makes it worthwhile.
Anythign from getting good at a game, playing/watching through a series you wanted to play/see, doing sports, doing better at school, taking extra shifts at work to save up money. Basicly anything you can look at and feel like you've achieved something, be it a personal desire (like beating a game) or more common stuff, like gathering some savings.
Set goals like the ones mentioned above for yourself, something with a solid criteria for completion like "i've watched this now" "i've saved up the 5000 i wanted" "i've improved my grades" "i can now lift more/run further/got my new belt" "i finished my drawing/short story" "i managed to quit ciggarets"
Adding purpose, even if it's small or can be considered unimportant like gameing/watching stuff is always nice.

This is not meant to sound cold, but distancing yourself from your emotions, at least temprarily, untill there's room for more happy thoughts to be there as well, can be nice sometimes, and it can make it easier to "grind through" if the things that are bringing you down are things you have to go through for a period, like school, a period of overtime at work, passing time while unemployment etc.
if it's hard to be happy, beeing able to see that you're making progress in some other aspects of life can help keep up faith in that things will get better.

I got through some depressed times by grinding through at school and work, in order to not make my situation worse, and then getting high when i got home, but the last part is probably not considered good advice, especially if you're not sure you'll fell better by doing it, and know you have the discipline to not let it make your situation worse

Check out a therapist if you don't think it's something you can pull through on your own.

Obvious Disclaimer:
I'm no therapist, and all advice is based on personal experiance and is not a professional oppinion.

 

[Angie7F]

10 to 11 is quite long and my heart goes out to you.
I find that after removing the cause of my depression i got much better.
Maybe you can also look into what is bringing you down, and change it.
It is tough at first but it pays off in the long run.
It worked better for me than the hours i spent at a shrink

 

[TehCookie]

If you really want to kill yourself, go bear wrestling, punch a shark, visit an active volcano get a pet Orangutan and name it Clyde and teach him to do tricks. If you feel like you want to die do that thing you've always dreamed of, even if it's just as simple as going adventuring. You wanted to kill yourself before so you don't want to worry about dieing.

Or do the sane thing and get pills (and if they don't work try a different kind), go to therapy and talk to your friends/family. If you are feeling troubled you should let them know so they can help. Don't try to hide your issues by just talking to anonymous people online, talk to people who have some influence in your life. Also don't try to force yourself to do things you use to enjoy if you no longer do, use that to find something different and try new things. What works for some people doesn't work for everyone, you need to find what works for you.

 

[Bleidd Whitefalcon]

I apologize for leaving everyone hanging like this - just got my internet back after it went down Saturday morning.

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I've actually been looking into therapists but I'm having difficulty finding one that doesn't just have a 15 minute appointment and prescribe some drugs (which, quite frankly, I'm INCREDIBLY uncomfortable with - given my brain chemistry, I'm more likely to get addicted then most people). Don't really have anyone to hang out with or confide in, unfortunately. Something of a loner. Sleep schedule has been shot to hell because of stress and bad nightmares - there's about a 50% chance each night that I wake up screaming. And yes, the avatar is Morpheus. Feel free to steal it if you like.

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Can you elaborate a bit on cognitive behavioral therapy? And I might take you up on that offer. Also, (you probably get this a lot) where's your avatar from? It's been bugging me because it seems familiar but I can't place it.

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The cause of your depression? I was under the impression that it was usually caused by fucked up brain chemistry. How do you go about removing that (pther then meds, which I'm uncomfortable with for reasons listed above)

 

[Legion]

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The cause of your depression? I was under the impression that it was usually caused by fucked up brain chemistry. How do you go about removing that (pther then meds, which I'm uncomfortable with for reasons listed above)

Not all depression is. If you have suffered a bereavement, or trauma then it's more likely caused by repressing painful memories or something else.

If it is genetically related, then it's more likely to be due to chemicals.

Bear in mind that when it comes to psychological or neurological problems, they are not as easily defined as physiological ones, due to their nature.

That said, you asked me this:

Can you elaborate a bit on cognitive behavioural therapy?

Cognitive behavioural therapy stems from the belief that depression is caused with faulty thinking patterns. People who are depressed tend to look at things differently than others might.

I cannot pretend to be an expert on the subject, as I only touched on it briefly when studying psychology, but here is an excerpt that is the basic reasoning behind it:

The premise of mainstream cognitive behavioural therapy is that changing maladaptive thinking leads to change in affect and in behaviour. but recent variants emphasize changes in one's relationship to maladaptive thinking rather than changes in thinking itself. Therapists or computer-based programs use CBT techniques to help individuals challenge their patterns and beliefs and replace "errors in thinking such as overgeneralising, magnifying negatives, minimizing positives and catastrophizing" with "more realistic and effective thoughts, thus decreasing emotional distress and self-defeating behaviour" or to take a more open, mindful, and aware posture toward them so as to diminish their impact.

Basically it's not trying to re-wire your brain or anything ridiculous like that, but to change your thinking patterns, and to develop a more balanced outlook. This is normally done with the help of a therapist trained in such things, and they tend help via a mixture of cognitive therapy (examining maladaptive thoughts and correcting them) and behavioural therapy (such as teaching coping mechanisms).

I am not sure how well I have explained it, but as I mentioned before, this is really the kind of thing a doctor would be much better at discussing. Especially as such treatments largely depend on the cause of the depression and the type. It is not, as far as I am aware commonly used for bi-polar disorder (AKA manic depression).

Also, (you probably get this a lot) where's your avatar from? It's been bugging me because it seems familiar but I can't place it.

Ordinarily I'd PM so as not to derail, but seeing as I am responding anyway, it is from an anime called Mardock Scramble. It's based upon a book of the same name. It's not a series, but a trilogy of short movies. The third one has only been released in Japan, as it came out late last year over there.

 

[Mel Theofficegamergirl]

therapy and meditation. that's what did it for me. I still deal with it now and again but these two things together work. Best to find out what kind of depression you have before taking advice from a forum though. Don't start meds unless you're 100% sure that it's a chemical imbalance. If it's cognitive issues, or a matter of just thoughts, it's something that can be handled without medication. Sometimes they make it worse. :/
Also, if you drink, stop. That will also help.

 

[Zoe Castillo]

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[Bleidd Whitefalcon]

therapy and meditation. that's what did it for me. I still deal with it now and again but these two things together work. Best to find out what kind of depression you have before taking advice from a forum though. Don't start meds unless you're 100% sure that it's a chemical imbalance. If it's cognitive issues, or a matter of just thoughts, it's something that can be handled without medication. Sometimes they make it worse. :/
Also, if you drink, stop. That will also help.

I've been on meds before... I'm one of those they made worse. Hence the wariness of doctors - most go "depression" and toss meds at me >.> And given my already fucked brain chemistry (also have ADHD), i'm more likely to get addicted then most people. Part of the reason I'm leery of the meds.

read this . when my friend was going through a particularly rough patch I asked her to take a look at this, she still claims that this book saved her life .

Spoiler

http://www.vanityfair.com/magazine/archive/1989/12/styron198912

Thanks I'll be sure to take a look at it

 

[JimB]

The most useful single piece of advice I was ever given about coping with my depression is--and stick with me here, because I promise this isn't as dismissive as it might seem--"Just let it go."

Depression is not effortless for me (at least not until I reach a certain point, after which it becomes self-perpetuating). It's an instinct so deeply engraved in me I don't always realize I'm doing it, but it does take some minimal level of contribution on my part, if only in that I have to be willing to entertain whatever thought gets me started down the road. If I don't entertain that, if I just let it go, there's a palpable sense of a weight being lifted from me, and that sensation of relief is a pretty good antidote to depression for me.

 

[Dirge Eterna]

I have suffered from depression since I was about 11 or 12 and I am 37 now. Lots of things contributed to it besides just a biological imbalance and before I ever knew what was happening to me and why I almost checked out a few times. My attitude before was everything sucks and everyone is an asshole. I was rarely wrong as a lot of life depends on your perspective on it. My depression was more of an absence of feelings than feeling down exactly. I was only able to be sad or mad 95% of the time and when I was happy it was very short lived. But for the last 9 years I have been taking Prozac and trying to focus on the good things in life. It isnt a perfect life and I don't like having to take meds for the rest of my life but everyone notices a huge difference when I am not taking my meds and when I am. Plus I have a 6 year old little boy and a wife to take care of. Talking to a therapist helped me to clear out a lot of the negative thoughts but medicine is the only thing that has truly helped in the long term.

 

[Super Kami Guru]

I really sympathise with your situation, I've been depressed for 7 months now and it's absolute hell.

I don't what treatment you've already had but there's plenty out there. The first step is going to see you GP and get reffered to a specialist, I don't know what services are available to you, but I got reffered to Mental Health Practioner and to a "Crisis Response Home Treatment team CRHT" because initally it was very servere, I tried to starve myself into hospital for 2 weeks, made a few attempts at self harm and spent several nights for weeks at a local cliff top trying to work up mentality to jump. Eventually I had daily sessions withe CRHT team and monthly check ups with the Mental Health Practioner and I've been put on an anti-depressant/sleeping tablet because I couldn't sleep. I've since had to self refer to the local "Young Perons Council YPC" for more in depth treatment.

Depending on where you are there's lots out there to help, but it starts with wanting to seek help.

Other than that I would suggest making changes to your life, get a new hobby, do a bit of travelling, learn a new skill, start on a path to self improvment to make you proud of yourself.