Cra-zy conspiracies! (Now with 40% more logic-jumping!)
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JFK faked his own death, and secretly ruled the US for more than half a decade from Cuba, which the US secretly retained control over after the Spanish American war. This is why American citizens aren't allowed to go to Cuba. Castro is an actor hired by the CIA to give the illusion that Cuba is an independent country, and to give a plausible pretext for the US travel ban.
Marilyn Monroe's death was also faked so she and JFK could remarry in Cuba.
When JFK's health began to fade, his son JFK Jr. faked his own death in a plane crash so he could join his father in Cuba. This allowed him to be prepared to take over his father's throne upon his death, which happened 6 years ago. Democracy is a myth.
Wake up sheeple.
Marilyn Monroe's death was also faked so she and JFK could remarry in Cuba.
When JFK's health began to fade, his son JFK Jr. faked his own death in a plane crash so he could join his father in Cuba. This allowed him to be prepared to take over his father's throne upon his death, which happened 6 years ago. Democracy is a myth.
Wake up sheeple.
Time cube was the first thing to pop into my head when I saw this thread. The only problem is that it's way too incoherent for me to call it a conspiracy theory.lacktheknack said:
As an aside though, the most hilarious thing about it isn't that it's completely bonkers. It's that the page goes on for so long, and when you finally reach the bottom, you're greeted with the words "next page."
And when you hit the bottom of THAT, you're greeted with SEVEN MORE ARTICLES to peruse, with lovely topics such as "All Clock Faces Are Wrong", "Pedantic Mind Control" and "Are You Jewish?"Waffle_Man said:
Allright, i'll try to give you a rough transcript. First of all, that man is "Dr." Axel Stoll and this is a best-of-video of his speeches in the "Neuschwabenland Forum", which is a "Stammtisch" of neo-nazis. "Stammtisch" means just an informal group of people meeting in a pub talking about whatever and "Neuschwabenland" is the name of that supposedly top secret nazi base in Antarctica.Surpheal said:
So to the transcript, imagine it all in a bit of a slightly militaristic tone. Stuff in [...] was added by me.
"I welcome you to our... yes, "Heil"...
---
My name is Stoll, Axel Stoll. I am have a PhD in natural science. I have studied physics, mathematics and geology. All other science is... Only natural science counts. On principle we only need three sciences to describe everything. Physics, mathematics, philosophy. Everything else is unnessecary.
---
Medicine is mathematics, physics.
(Question from the off: Biology?)
Biology is physics.
---
... and I deal with free energy and military technology. But military technology, not the natural explosive weapons but what I am interested in are beam weapons. Microwave, Scalarwave. Of extraordinary destructivity, they can produce very beautiful desasters. I love desasters. (laughter) Yes, and one of those will occur next year. But presumably in the form of a natural desaster. I personally don't believe, I can reassure you there, In a nuclear war because of the following significant reasons: Our old master Peter Schmidt sitting in front of me has mentioned it numerous times that WORLDWIDE all nuclear weapons, nuclear missiles, nuclear bombs are neutralized. That's not a problem at all. I can neutralize radioactive radiation too.
---
Following that we continue with part 7 about the German space flight since 1934. That's amazing, isn't it?
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Klaus, what is your topic?
(Klaus presumably: News from the [didn't understand that one, "champions" maybe?]-scene... Got support from Yugoslavia.)
Very good.
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Should the USA, Israel or the criminals, the british, island monkeys, I hate them anyway, attack they are military screwed. Royally. Because the Iran has the most modern weapon systems made in China and Russia.
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The Russians are in weapons technology far superior to the Americans. YOU HAVE TO KNOW THAT! [catchphrase] You have to know that. As if! 'The poor russian army.' FORGET IT! I say it again: Since almost 10 years the T-92 is being produced, a most modern tank, russian tank, with a top speed of 300km/h [That's about 180mph].
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I think that noone here is superstitious, I am not."
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My name is Stoll, Axel Stoll. I am have a PhD in natural science. I have studied physics, mathematics and geology. All other science is... Only natural science counts. On principle we only need three sciences to describe everything. Physics, mathematics, philosophy. Everything else is unnessecary.
---
Medicine is mathematics, physics.
(Question from the off: Biology?)
Biology is physics.
---
... and I deal with free energy and military technology. But military technology, not the natural explosive weapons but what I am interested in are beam weapons. Microwave, Scalarwave. Of extraordinary destructivity, they can produce very beautiful desasters. I love desasters. (laughter) Yes, and one of those will occur next year. But presumably in the form of a natural desaster. I personally don't believe, I can reassure you there, In a nuclear war because of the following significant reasons: Our old master Peter Schmidt sitting in front of me has mentioned it numerous times that WORLDWIDE all nuclear weapons, nuclear missiles, nuclear bombs are neutralized. That's not a problem at all. I can neutralize radioactive radiation too.
---
Following that we continue with part 7 about the German space flight since 1934. That's amazing, isn't it?
---
Klaus, what is your topic?
(Klaus presumably: News from the [didn't understand that one, "champions" maybe?]-scene... Got support from Yugoslavia.)
Very good.
---
Should the USA, Israel or the criminals, the british, island monkeys, I hate them anyway, attack they are military screwed. Royally. Because the Iran has the most modern weapon systems made in China and Russia.
---
The Russians are in weapons technology far superior to the Americans. YOU HAVE TO KNOW THAT! [catchphrase] You have to know that. As if! 'The poor russian army.' FORGET IT! I say it again: Since almost 10 years the T-92 is being produced, a most modern tank, russian tank, with a top speed of 300km/h [That's about 180mph].
---
I think that noone here is superstitious, I am not."
That's just the first 2 1/2 minutes and all I got the drive for right now. Maybe I'll do some more later.
Australia is like the US in terms of impossibility of invasion. You're a single country in the middle of the ocean. To land troops would be almost impossible but to supply an invasion force would be nearly impossible without hella help from some of the larger countries.lechat said:
And that's not even taking into account Australia's military capabilities.
the fuck is this i don't evenWaffle_Man said:
Seriously, we can lock this thread down. Nothing will ever top that.
I can't really mention any crayzee conspiracies I'd have come across, but this thread is already freaking hilarious.
nope wait wait hold everything....this theory is still a thing, I got a pamphlet randomly mailed to me by these guys, was basically word for word what's on the sitebartholen said:
[link]http://www.geocentricbible.com/[/link]
The nose insane one was a YouTube video claiming the earth is hollow (which is old hat), but the rub is we live on the INSIDE of the sphere. Gravity is just centrifugal force from the spin, and, here's the best bit, the stars are just street lights on the other side of the globe. Even thinking about that for 5 seconds you could come up with damning proof that its false.
I really hope that was just some massive joke.
I really hope that was just some massive joke.
Still relevant. I have an uncle who thinks HAARP is trying to find a way to control the weather, and that they were behind the recent storms on the east coast...Surpheal said:
In the words of Troy from Community:Waffle_Man said:
"MY WHOLE BRAIN IS CRYING RIGHT NOW!"
Seriously... wat?
