Cruising for a Bruising Alternatives.

[Amethyst Wind]

You're scopin' for a Nope-in'.

Spoiler: In this context.

 

[Wyes]

Spoiler: SMBC saves the day

/thread?

 

[Rose and Thorn]

There are so many good ones I don't think I could add my own because it is probably already used somewhere in here.

 

[RobDaBank]

Pushing for a crushing then some more words to avoid a low content post

 

[The Almighty Aardvark]

Picking for a licking
Proceeding to a bleeding
(I'm aware bleeding has already been used)
Leering for a spearing
Grabbing for a stabbing

Booting for a Shooting

Or alternatively shooting for a booting

EDIT: Also, dogging for a flogging

 

[Owen Robertson]

[I said snip so many times I should be called Anakin]

How are you people rhyming "asking" and "smashing"?

I pronounce ask as Ahhhhh-sk.

I don't see the rhyme here.

No it wasn't very good, and I realize that. That's why there's a question mark. If you had seen/heard me speak you would have picked up that I didn't believe in my rhyme. But, as we are working with text, something was lost. So here we are.

You mustn't listen to much Hip-Hop or Rap. Sometimes words don't even come close to rhyming but artists (I use that term lightly) go on and rap it anyway, because with the right (mis)pronunciation it works. Sorry to have confused you so. Now get outta here, 'cuz you're crusin' for a brusin' as is.

 

[chozo_hybrid]

Aching for a raking, is one my grandad used.

 

[Mr Fixit]

Snitches get stitches & end up dead in ditches.

& that's all I got, I think everything else has already been said.

 

[Bebop]

My dad always said cruising for a bruising and itchin for a lickin

 

[Jamash]

Here are some older ones that have fallen out of use since the advent of firearms:

Hoarding for a Swording
Swaggering for a Daggering
Bracing for a Macing
Hiking for a Spiking
Biking for a Piking
Peering for a Spearing
Waxing for a Axing
Wailing for a Flailing
Yammering for a Hammering
Yearning for a Burning
Heaving for a Cleaving
Harrowing for an Arrowing
Pending for a Rending
Blubbing for a Clubbing
Willing for a Billing (Bill Hook)
Writhing for a Scything
Weeping for a Reaping

That's about all I can think of remember from Ye Olde Booke of Medieval Threats.

 

[Altercator]

Let's try presidents:

Barack's gonna Attack
Dubya's gonna Snub Ya
Bill Clinton will clean town
George Bush's gotta Push
Ronnie Reagan's gotta Raygun
Jimmy Carter's gonna Fart Ya!
Nixon's gonna fixin'
Harry Truman gonna screw you, man!
Teddy Roosevelt's ready to pelt!
Andrew Jackson's gonna make you crack, son!
George Washington's gonna wash this town!