D&D Help: First DMing

[A Gent of Villainous Intent]

So I have been given the opportunity to make a "test" adventure, which would be an evaluation of whether or not I could DM in a campaign of my making.

So in my group I have the following arch-types: A Smooth Talker (Continuously uses Diplomacy and Bluff. The bastard even once convinced a fire elemental to continue running an airship so we'd make it to an island.), A pair of slayers, and a player that is considered a "watcher", and I am starting at 5th level.

My premise for the adventure is that the group is on a boat, shit happens, and the boat is attacked by Lizard-folk on Dragon Turtles. They are then boarded and forced to repel them until the ship is capsized, and the group is fished out of the sea by a group of fisherman (Details N/A), and are brought back to the nearby village of Coraston (Coral and Stone each with the last letter removed), and brought to see the owner of the ship Raphael Collins. He then hires them to deal with the pirates themselves, but has spent too much money on protecting his boats to risk another so the PCs can get to the Blood Scale Pirate's Lair.

So they get a boat through any means necessary, get to lair, fight their way through a combination of Lizard-Folk, Drakes, and crocodiles. And get to the big bad's lair, where they learn that Raphael actually contracted the Blood Scales to attack competitor's ships, but starting a few days ago, they've begun attacking his ships (Not being able to tell them apart), and so he has deemed them worthless and a liability.

Meanwhile, Raphael has sent a full crewed ship to the island, to kill the PCs, tying up a loose end, and securing the Blood-scale base for his own.

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I used one of the "Jumping off points" on the D&D website, and came up with this.

 

[Levitas1234]

I think it would make more sense and be a bit better if instead of Raphael contracting the pirates to knock out competition, to know out you but your party does not find out to later. That gives you room to add a reason why Raphael would want you killed (maybe he belongs to a cultist town that frowns upon outsiders?)

 

[Asukane]

Being a DM/GM myself, I would say that the story is sound. Just keep in mind that that is not even close to the full amount of work you need to do to DM. I would love to help out a new DM more, but that is really all I can say without knowing things like; the style of play you plan on doing, the way your players get things done and other things like just how good of a roleplayer you are for the NPC.

A few things I will say is make hard DCs for the cha based checks. Characters with high cha can make your life hard at times. Also if your players know what they are doing, know your rules. People that have played lots of D&D know how to make their characters as overpowered as possible. Be sure not to let them get away with things they shouldn't.
Example: Droping a whale on a group of enemines.

 

[Eumersian]

I think the real test in DMing isn't in what kind of adventure you can come up with. Admittedly, if your adventures are boring, then you have no business DMing, but coming up with a serviceable, effective story to put the players into is not the hardest part of DMing. The most important skill is the ability to improvise.

My advice: When you're at a loss, give them some garbage mysterious item or event to happen, and ask them to investigate. As they are investigating, you should easily have a good five minutes to think of something good to throw at them next.

Your adventure seems pretty good. In my honest opinion, it's not incredibly creative, and it's a pretty obvious plot twist. Then again, that's exactly the kind of plot that simply works well. No problems there.

If I were to modify your adventure, I would make it so that there was some different reason that the Blood Scales began to attack Raphael's ships. Maybe something like a captured messenger or forged note from some outside source. Maybe the Raphael told the Blood Scales that a ship with their pay was coming, but it got hijaked and never made it, or even worse was used to attack the Blood Scales. Not only does that create a "mysterious" enemy to fight, an enemy that the players can't get information about, but then you have a possible subject for another adventure already secured.

 

[GrimTuesday]

I DMed for the first time the other day. It was really short notice so I wasn't very prepared. Suffice to say it ended rather ridiculously with the PC's killing 3 really crappy spies who couldn't do Canadian accents so instead did the stereotypical Jew voice. Not one of my proudest moments, I think I'll stick to just playing.

 

[Zemalac]

A word of advice: Don't have the patron (Raphael Collins) betray the players unless he has a very good reason. In the scenario you have set up, he's already betraying one set of allies, namely the pirates. He doesn't need to have the players killed; they are to the Blood Scale Pirates what his ship of armed men following them is to them. They are his hit squad. If he had another hit squad that he believed was of greater power than the players (i.e., able to take them out), he would have sent those guys after the pirates.

Basically, what I'm saying is that as it stands Raphael's betrayal of the PCs makes no sense--it serves no purpose other than to have a twist in the story, which you already have with the revelation that the pirates were originally working for him. And if he doesn't betray them it brings up interesting roleplaying possibilities. If the players confront him with the information, will he offer more money to keep silent, or will he freak out and try to kill them? If they don't confront him, and he finds out later that they know, will he send assassins after them to protect his reputation? Or will he not care what some petty fool adventurers might or might not know? Have the choices that the players make about what to do with this information influence where the game turns next.

That's what I would do, at least. I may steal the basic outline for this adventure, actually. On the whole, it's pretty good. Just be aware that the players are going to do things you didn't expect, and be prepared to improvise (have random charts and stuff close to hand).

 

[rockforlifeguy]

Ok, what you want to do is ditch shitty D&D and pick up some World of darkness. Better gaming system and more story based. Easier to keep everyone from xp hunting because it is nothing like D&D's. In closing D&D sucks. It sucks big sweaty nuts. Find a game called Orpheus.

 

[Eumersian]

Also, incorporate some kind of mystical widget. People love that stuff, especially if they don't know what it is but they keep it anyway just in case.

 

[A Gent of Villainous Intent]

Also, incorporate some kind of mystical widget. People love that stuff, especially if they don't know what it is but they keep it anyway just in case.

One who's only first function is that you can throw it.

I think the real test in DMing isn't in what kind of adventure you can come up with. Admittedly, if your adventures are boring, then you have no business DMing, but coming up with a serviceable, effective story to put the players into is not the hardest part of DMing. The most important skill is the ability to improvise.

My advice: When you're at a loss, give them some garbage mysterious item or event to happen, and ask them to investigate. As they are investigating, you should easily have a good five minutes to think of something good to throw at them next.

Your adventure seems pretty good. In my honest opinion, it's not incredibly creative, and it's a pretty obvious plot twist. Then again, that's exactly the kind of plot that simply works well. No problems there.

If I were to modify your adventure, I would make it so that there was some different reason that the Blood Scales began to attack Raphael's ships. Maybe something like a captured messenger or forged note from some outside source. Maybe the Raphael told the Blood Scales that a ship with their pay was coming, but it got hijaked and never made it, or even worse was used to attack the Blood Scales. Not only does that create a "mysterious" enemy to fight, an enemy that the players can't get information about, but then you have a possible subject for another adventure already secured.

Thank you very much. The "Shadow Enemy" twist will probably be better received considering the player's personalities.

A word of advice: Don't have the patron (Raphael Collins) betray the players unless he has a very good reason. In the scenario you have set up, he's already betraying one set of allies, namely the pirates. He doesn't need to have the players killed; they are to the Blood Scale Pirates what his ship of armed men following them is to them. They are his hit squad. If he had another hit squad that he believed was of greater power than the players (i.e., able to take them out), he would have sent those guys after the pirates.

Basically, what I'm saying is that as it stands Raphael's betrayal of the PCs makes no sense--it serves no purpose other than to have a twist in the story, which you already have with the revelation that the pirates were originally working for him. And if he doesn't betray them it brings up interesting roleplaying possibilities. If the players confront him with the information, will he offer more money to keep silent, or will he freak out and try to kill them? If they don't confront him, and he finds out later that they know, will he send assassins after them to protect his reputation? Or will he not care what some petty fool adventurers might or might not know? Have the choices that the players make about what to do with this information influence where the game turns next.

That's what I would do, at least. I may steal the basic outline for this adventure, actually. On the whole, it's pretty good. Just be aware that the players are going to do things you didn't expect, and be prepared to improvise (have random charts and stuff close to hand).

All right, so the betrayal is out. I'll probably just use Eumersian's idea.

Though this does mean I'll have to tweak the dungeon so that it has more battles.