Dating Blindness

[Paragon Fury]

I don't think it's possible, I'm proof of this to myself. I had virtually no contact with any women aside from my family for like five years, I eventually started working again, got my life back on track, and then recently I decided to start playing the dating game. I had an awkward start, but after a short while, it became apparent to me that I'm naturally gifted when it comes to socializing with people(not online, online people aren't real, except for me). I can shoot past a lot of barriers in no time.

I'm not saying everybody should be inherently amazing like I am, but it's just a matter of instinct more than anything. Do you have the drive or don't you?

Oh, I've got the drive. But I lost the keys, and the car is currently sitting in my next door neighbor's front hall with a noticeable chunk of their front wall missing.

I think I think the raccoon with the tread marks on it may be related to this somehow.....

 

[Hawk of Battle]

Is it possible for someone, in this case a guy, because of years of no experience/interaction or even significant contact with women, to become so inept and incapable of detecting, responding to flirtation/romantic and/or intimate advances or interacting with women on a non-surface level that you could essentially call them a lost cause or that they'll never be good enough at it to accomplish anything meaningful?

Well, that certainly seems to describe me, aye.

Pretty sure he was describing me too there.

 

[saintdane05]

This is relevant:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9hjHUoMaUSg

 

[Fappy]

[small/]oh for fucks sake[/small]

stop over thinking it..here's a revolutionary thought

[b/]women are just like you[/b]

If that were true I'd be fired for playing with my own boobies at work!

 

[Vault101]

If that were true I'd be fired for playing with my own boobies at work!

what?..if you had man boobs they wouldn't be good enough?

 

[Paragon Fury]

If that were true I'd be fired for playing with my own boobies at work!

what?..if you had man boobs they wouldn't be good enough?

No.

Man boobs are an abomination, and must be purged from this sector.

The Ordo "UghThatsNasty-ous: has been dispatched.

 

[Blindswordmaster]

You know, if you're talking about me, you should just say it. I'm not good with subtlety.
In all seriousness though, I know your pain man. I feel that the trick is just to be completely honest with someone you're interested in. Ask someone out, try talking regularly, and just her that you're really inexperienced with dating. Trial and error man. Just keep trying until you find something that works. Godspeed.

 

[Johnny Impact]

I am that person.

It's not that I wouldn't see a signal. I just wouldn't attach anything positive to it.

I've been flirted with for practical jokes on a number of occasions; I've never been flirted with seriously. The women I have approached have been universally unimpressed. Yeah, I know, gocryemokid.jpg.

Analogy time! You can dangle a carrot in front of a mule, and he'll walk for a long time, never complaining.... but if you never, ever let him have the carrot, he might die of starvation, or he might simply get wise to your game, but sooner or later he WILL stop walking.

 

[Paragon Fury]

You know, if you're talking about me, you should just say it. I'm not good with subtlety.
In all seriousness though, I know your pain man. I feel that the trick is just to be completely honest with someone you're interested in. Ask someone out, try talking regularly, and just her that you're really inexperienced with dating. Trial and error man. Just keep trying until you find something that works. Godspeed.

Telling people you're not good at something that they're not required to have you around for generally tends to have them not stick around or find someone else.

 

[TWRule]

I'm not talking about someone who socially isolated as in no human contact; this is a person who is able to function normally and everything in everyday life, but they simply don't "get" or unable to respond to any kind of romantic interaction. They like women, and even think about romantic relationships and the like but the actual forming of one and carrying one out appears beyond their ability.

Less "disability" and more along the lines of a cultural/social disconnect, like if you just dumped an American person into Russia, etc.

It's far from impossible to accomplish "anything meaningful" in terms of a relationship from such a "shortcoming". Perhaps a person can have an unpracticed eye for such subtleties, but genuine relationships don't operate solely through "romantic" channels. Even if one is paying attention, it's possible they simply have no taste for, do not see the purpose of such frivolities.

My advice to said man would be simply to see if they can talk genuinely about whatever concerns he has with whatever girl he encounters. If he can't, the signals don't matter unless you're looking for a superficial relationship only, if he can they don't matter either, because the chemistry happens elsewise. Some people might say that that would take the playfulness and excitement out of the courting process, but the relationship itself can have those qualities without unnecessary guessing.

 

[Blindswordmaster]

You know, if you're talking about me, you should just say it. I'm not good with subtlety.
In all seriousness though, I know your pain man. I feel that the trick is just to be completely honest with someone you're interested in. Ask someone out, try talking regularly, and just her that you're really inexperienced with dating. Trial and error man. Just keep trying until you find something that works. Godspeed.

Telling people you're not good at something that they're not required to have you around for generally tends to have them not stick around or find someone else.

I don't know if it's because it was awkwardly worded, or if because I haven't slept in 68 hours, but I couldn't decipher your sentence there. Please state it in a more straightforward fashion.

 

[Paragon Fury]

You know, if you're talking about me, you should just say it. I'm not good with subtlety.
In all seriousness though, I know your pain man. I feel that the trick is just to be completely honest with someone you're interested in. Ask someone out, try talking regularly, and just her that you're really inexperienced with dating. Trial and error man. Just keep trying until you find something that works. Godspeed.

Telling people you're not good at something that they're not required to have you around for generally tends to have them not stick around or find someone else.

I don't know if it's because it was awkwardly worded, or if because I haven't slept in 68 hours, but I couldn't decipher your sentence there. Please state it in a more straightforward fashion.

I don't see whats unclear about it......

 

[Blindswordmaster]

You know, if you're talking about me, you should just say it. I'm not good with subtlety.
In all seriousness though, I know your pain man. I feel that the trick is just to be completely honest with someone you're interested in. Ask someone out, try talking regularly, and just her that you're really inexperienced with dating. Trial and error man. Just keep trying until you find something that works. Godspeed.

Telling people you're not good at something that they're not required to have you around for generally tends to have them not stick around or find someone else.

I don't know if it's because it was awkwardly worded, or if because I haven't slept in 68 hours, but I couldn't decipher your sentence there. Please state it in a more straightforward fashion.

I don't see whats unclear about it......

Ok, I've had some sleep and now I'm up for a witty response. Well, I thought that people dated because they like that other person, not at their relationship proficiency. My bad.