Dialogue Fails in Video Gaming

[ArcWelder92]

L4D2 has some pretty WTF dialogue, but most of it his hilariously random, to where I'm sputtering WTF inbetween fits of laughter.

"Did I ever tell you about the time my buddy Keith drowned in the Tunnel of Love? You wouldn't think he could, what with the water being so shallow, but that's how it gets you." (Paraphrased)

God damn it Ellis...

 

[gmaverick019_v1legacy]

"You can either be a good writer, or a good game designer, you can't have both. Choose wisely!"

And that explains the entirety of Gears of War.

COLE TRAIN anyone?

hey hey hey, whats wrong with cole train???

OT: well oblivion and such takes the cake, they make that world expansive and side quest galore, but man...voices+writing+reactions = wtf + brain logic failure to the max

but i agree, if an rpg ever had good design + good writing, i think the world might just implode

 

[Tony2077]

The voice acting is bad, and so is the dialogue.

Edit: I hate Ninjas.

i read that he(Chris Jelinek) got family members to do it instead of hiring professional

 

[Hazy]

The very first resident evil had some pretty bad voice acting. xD

Oh, so I'm the only one who thought lines like these [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5XyghKl72R0] were completely realistic and handled rather well?
[sub][sub][sub][sub]Okay, I'm kidding, it was garbage.[/sub][/sub][/sub][/sub]

And do I even need to mention this?

"THEY'RE SINKING CITIES WITH A GIANT WORM!"​

 

[ClassicJokester]

If I wasn't so damn tired, I'd find video of the one beggar in Oblivion that would greet you and beg in a super high whiny voice, but then talk regularly for the other options.

But really, any talking in Oblivion or Fallout gets weird when you go from "Let me ask you something else" to "I have to go" and no one bats an eye.

 

[Chamale]

Yeah, Oblivion and Fallout 3 could have screwy dialogue. But Half-Life 2 also had some pretty bad moments. Like when

Spoiler

the Combine attack that lighthouse base with several dropships,

you'd hear "JESUS CHRIST, IT'S A MAJOR ATTACK! EVERYONE GET TO THE BUNKERS! GET YOUR - oh, excuse me, Dr. Freeman. Here, allow me to get out of your way. CLEAR THE FIRING LINES! GET READY TO FIGHT - oh, you should reload, Dr. Freeman." This was covered in more detail by Concerned:

Spoiler

 

[Lekonua]

Left 4 Dead 2 kind of gets on the annoying side whenever a character spots one of the Uncommon Infected. They have to point it out every single time and they randomly choose between maybe 3 dialog variations.

Say we're getting charged at by one of the Riot Gear infected.

"ARE THESE THINGS BULLETPROOF!?"
"THAT ZOMBIE'S GOT ARMOR!"
"ARE THESE THINGS BULLETPROOF!?"
"SHOOT 'EM IN THE BACK!"
"THAT ZOMBIE'S GOT ARMOR!"
"ARE THESE THINGS BULLETPROOF!?"
"GOTTA SHOOT 'EM IN THE BACK IF YOU WANT 'EM DEAD!"
"THAT ZOMBIE'S WEARING ARMOR!"

Yes Rochelle, they are bulletproof. Yes Coach and Nick, they have armor. Yes Ellis, I know I have to SHOOT THEM IN THE DAMN BACK.

 

[ThePostalGamer]

Mass Effect
Two different selectable dialogue options with varying degrees of arseholery in each one end up being exactly the same. I don't get it. Why have two different dialogue options that say the exact same things?

Fallout 3
It's a minor complaint, but you get it a lot and it can get annoying.
Lone Wanderer: "Let's talk about something else."
NPC: "Okay."
Lone Wanderer: "I have to go now."
NPC: "See you."

Dead Space
Above the desk where you pick up the Plasma Cutter, the words "CUT OFF THEIR LIMBS" are scrawled in blood on the wall. Great, now I know the most effective way to kill Necromorphs. Thanks.

Five minutes later:
"Isaac, be careful. Shooting them in the body didn't seem to work. Go for the limbs. dismember them. That should do the job."

Okay, I get the--

Suit: "Conserve ammo by dismembering enemy limbs and doing extra damage."

ALRIGHT, I know.

Ten minutes later:
Audio log: "This is Benson, tram engineering! We think we figured it out! Smith killed one! Listen, forget about shooting them in the body! You gotta cut off the limbs! Grab a cutter, anything like that! Cut 'em apart!"

FFFFFFFFFFFF...

 

[gigastrike]

Me: /shows nirnroot
Shop owner: That plant is unlike any I've ever seen.
Me: ...but you have one growing right there...and your an herb expert.

 

[elricik]

I love Final Fantasy games so much, that being said the dialog in every game in ridiculously bad.

"you spoony bard"

"I, Garland will knock all of you down!"

 

[Zing]

Not really a fail, but seemed hilarious and out of place. In KoTOR II when you Visas joins you and you speak to her, then Kreia, she immediately tells you not to breed with her, and one response is "Just because I saved her doesn't mean I want to ram my cargo up her loading ramp".

 

[Carnagath]

Pretty much all of the dialog in Just Cause 2, Bolo Santosi in particular. Don't get me wrong, the game itself is excellent, but sometimes the voice acting and lines are so bad, I have to wonder if they weren't doing a spoof of video game dialog.

Yeah, every part of that game that is NOT about the grappling hook and blowing shit up is such a massive trainwreck. At first I was not so sure if it was intentional or not (stupidity has no boundaries after all), but when I got to the mission where the enemy base commander tells you "NOW YOU WILL FACE MY NINJAS" and your characters replies "I HATE NINJAS" it was pretty clear that I was being trolled hard.

 

[Metallic Wombat Dace]

Resident Evil on the playstation when Barry gives Jill the lock pick almost made me vomit. The accents in Perfect Dark and Dues Ex were as also as bad

 

[Captain Pirate]

Fallout 3's random NPC dialogue gets annoying if you listen to it, but other than that it's quite well done. Doesn't sound stupid, but if you listen they keep repeating...
"I can't wait to get fresh water!"
"I hear something happened at project purity the other week"
But my personal favorite:
"Another child fell off the side of the boat last week. The council should really do something about that."
The amount of children that fall off is scary, I'm beginning to think they're being pushed.

 

[Ldude893]

<youtube=5XyghKl72R0>
<youtube=9oDGBDUKMcc&feature=related>

Japanese-American game translations at its strangest.

 

[atol]

Well it's not really a fail but it always bugs me for some reason but at a certain point in Mass Effect you're talking to Fist and:

Shepard: I never want to see you again.
Fist: Don't worry, you'll never see me again.

Yeah. I just really don't like that.

Reminds me of a cutscene in Soul Calibur 2:

Mitsurugi: I've had enough already!
Taki: Ha! Haven't you had enough?!

 

[Always_Remain]

Well it's not really a fail but it always bugs me for some reason but at a certain point in Mass Effect you're talking to Fist and:

Shepard: I never want to see you again.
Fist: Don't worry, you'll never see me again.

Yeah. I just really don't like that.

Reminds me of a cutscene in Soul Calibur 2:

Mitsurugi: I've had enough already!
Taki: Ha! Haven't you had enough?!

Soul Caliber does have it's moments in awkward dialogue.

 

[Counter_Southpaw]

Well it's not really a fail but it always bugs me for some reason but at a certain point in Mass Effect you're talking to Fist and:

Shepard: I never want to see you again.
Fist: Don't worry, you'll never see me again.

Yeah. I just really don't like that.

Reminds me of a cutscene in Soul Calibur 2:

Mitsurugi: I've had enough already!
Taki: Ha! Haven't you had enough?!

Soul Caliber does have it's moments in awkward dialogue.

This is very true.

Moments with Ivy, anyone? I find a lot of Japanese games translate so strangely into English..