Don't get too offended by the title, I'll elaborate.
When choosing your friends, there are certain qualities you look for. Some people just irritate you, so you spend the least amount of time possible with them. It doesn't mean that you attack them (verbally, physically, or otherwise), it just means you choose to spend your time with others. These discriminating qualities may include political, religious, or ethnic identities, though often it's more simple. Does this person smell? Do we share any interests? Is his laugh annoying? Does he have a propensity towards crapping his pants?
Now, these are normal criteria on which to determine friendship, no? Then why, oh why must I be forced to accept those who do not satisfy such a criteria just because "it's not their fault?" This is the argument I hear when I say I don't like hanging out with the SpEd student at school because she has a speech impediment. Or because he's been wearing the same outfit for about a month and smells like a doctor's office. People have called me insensitive for denying their friendship. Now I'm not attacking them, not calling them freaks or whatever, I'm just trying to avoid them. I would even ask them to go away if there was a nice enough way to do it.
This is actually less of a problem for the truly disabled, who in my experience tend to be reserved and uninvolved outside of their usual circle of close friends, but is certainly a problem for those with the more subtle "disorders," like that aspergers thing or ADHD. People who, ironically, are utterly lacking in subtlety. People who are tactless. People who have irritating habits. People who simply can't seem to pick up on physiological and social hints that get most of us by. I don't like these people, but to suggest that in public (or God forbid I say to their face and someone catches wind!) and I get the fifth degree! I don't care if they're "nice people," or if "they don't really mean it," they're goddamn annoying and I will not be forced to like them by virtue of pity! I've even been told I just have to help them along and they're ok. Whatever. There happen to be plenty of folks that I don't have to make concessions for to talk to. It's not my responsibility to teach some idiot how to behave like a reasonable adult, nor do I have the patience or skill for it.
This is going on a bit long, so I'll cut to the chase, i.e.
TLDNR
Do you feel like people with disorders/disabilities deserve special concessions in social groups, namely yours? Do you know anyone who's like this? Are you friends or do you make them sit on the other side of the room if possible? If you still don't know what type of person I'm talking about, think of the kind of personality traits held by Steve Carell's character in Dinner for Schmucks; he's the one who brought this up for me anyway.
Edit: In response to a few reasoned comments, I'll change the subject header from: Do the mentally challenged really deserve my acceptance?
When choosing your friends, there are certain qualities you look for. Some people just irritate you, so you spend the least amount of time possible with them. It doesn't mean that you attack them (verbally, physically, or otherwise), it just means you choose to spend your time with others. These discriminating qualities may include political, religious, or ethnic identities, though often it's more simple. Does this person smell? Do we share any interests? Is his laugh annoying? Does he have a propensity towards crapping his pants?
Now, these are normal criteria on which to determine friendship, no? Then why, oh why must I be forced to accept those who do not satisfy such a criteria just because "it's not their fault?" This is the argument I hear when I say I don't like hanging out with the SpEd student at school because she has a speech impediment. Or because he's been wearing the same outfit for about a month and smells like a doctor's office. People have called me insensitive for denying their friendship. Now I'm not attacking them, not calling them freaks or whatever, I'm just trying to avoid them. I would even ask them to go away if there was a nice enough way to do it.
This is actually less of a problem for the truly disabled, who in my experience tend to be reserved and uninvolved outside of their usual circle of close friends, but is certainly a problem for those with the more subtle "disorders," like that aspergers thing or ADHD. People who, ironically, are utterly lacking in subtlety. People who are tactless. People who have irritating habits. People who simply can't seem to pick up on physiological and social hints that get most of us by. I don't like these people, but to suggest that in public (or God forbid I say to their face and someone catches wind!) and I get the fifth degree! I don't care if they're "nice people," or if "they don't really mean it," they're goddamn annoying and I will not be forced to like them by virtue of pity! I've even been told I just have to help them along and they're ok. Whatever. There happen to be plenty of folks that I don't have to make concessions for to talk to. It's not my responsibility to teach some idiot how to behave like a reasonable adult, nor do I have the patience or skill for it.
This is going on a bit long, so I'll cut to the chase, i.e.
TLDNR
Do you feel like people with disorders/disabilities deserve special concessions in social groups, namely yours? Do you know anyone who's like this? Are you friends or do you make them sit on the other side of the room if possible? If you still don't know what type of person I'm talking about, think of the kind of personality traits held by Steve Carell's character in Dinner for Schmucks; he's the one who brought this up for me anyway.
Edit: In response to a few reasoned comments, I'll change the subject header from: Do the mentally challenged really deserve my acceptance?