Do you look people in the eyes when you talk to them?

[axlryder]

I've often found the idea of looking into someone's eyes to be an almost intimate experience. What's more, When I look at someone in the eye, they usually react in their own little way. Some people get creeped out. Some people act intimidated. Some people seem to get more confrontational. Some people seem appreciative. Some people even seem to get emotionally connected. I, for one, sometimes have trouble looking people in the eye when I talk to them, but occasionally find it to result in a very rewarding feeling. I imagine that overall it leaves a stronger impression on people and results in more engaged conversation, so from a business perspective it's a skill I'm trying to develop..

I'm curious, do you tend to look people in the eye? How does it make you feel when you do it? How does it make you feel when people look you in the eye?

Also, excuse any typos, I've been drinking.

 

[Pink Gregory]

Not at all, feels unnatural, though I understand that it technically is. I explain it in job interviews and people tend to be fairly understanding.

 

[manic_depressive13]

Making eye contact makes me feel incredibly uncomfortable, even with people I'm close to. When I'm compelled to look at someone in the eyes for whatever reason, my eyes tend to glass over so I'm not really looking.

 

[Lucem712]

I like to make occasional contact but extended eye contact can be very...awkward and exclusionary. Probably look like a drug addict or something, eyes jittering everywhere >_> ._. <_<

 

[PsychicTaco115]

Whenever I start a conversation, I look them in the eye and finish what I started saying

Because I'm HARDCORE-LEET for that

 

[Amethyst Wind]

People don't? I always have, thought it was good manners to do so.

Also even a slight angle when talking to somebody decreases their ability to hear you clearly by more than you think.

Hmm, thinking about it now this might become a problem where I am (Japan).

Spoiler: Oh well.

 

[smithy_2045]

Occasionally. Getting locked into eyecontact is way too awkward, but never making eye contact is just as bad.

 

[Dire Sloth]

Slightly related:
Someone once told me that if you're ever walking around in Russia, never look ever at someone and catch eyes. It's considered extremely rude.
Thought that was interesting - assuming it's true.

 

[Eleuthera]

I tend to make some eye-contact when conversing. Keeping eye contact is weird though, it too personal, so really only use either to threaten or "seduce".

 

[axrec1980]

I mainly look at people's hands with some eye contact thrown in.

 

[Vegosiux]

Depending on the conversation, of course. And I can maintain eye contact long enough to make others uncomfortable most of the time, so I sometimes do it when I want to make someone shut up as well.

Though my tendency to roll my eyes when annoyed/exasperated kind of gets in the way of that, sometimes.

On the other hand, eyes are the part of a woman's body that really does it for me, so if I see a particularly nice pair, I'm going to keep contact for a bit...not in that leery, oogly way though. Though, it'd be a riot if one said "Hey, my tits are down there".

 

[lechat]

i practiced polite eye gazing by having staring competitions with my cat

 

[Mr Cwtchy]

Short answer, no.

I sometimes look my dog in the eyes, when she's being scolded and such, but otherwise no. I generally look to the side of the person, at my feet or any other random direction that isn't them.

 

[Vault101]

not really I tend to make it acasionally but glance around

 

[Doclector]

I usually do. Not for too long, but I will look you in the eye if I want you to believe me.

Whether I'm lying or not.

 

[Epic Bear Man]

I generally maintain eye contact for a couple of seconds, and then dart my eyes away as I'm thinking of what to say. Even when I'm not talking to someone, just listening to a teacher ramble on, if I see that are eyes connect, I tend to sever the connection by looking elsewhere (e.g. the board).

I mainly don't maintain eye contact just because it makes me feel slightly uncomfortable and also because it tends to distract me. I make occasional eye-contact just to signify I am talking to the person (or listening to them), but I break it off otherwise I'll end up forgetting what I was trying to say.

Even with my significant other I have trouble maintaining eye contact all the time. I tend to lower my eyes to her lips or side of her face if we make eye contact for too long. I try not to drop my eye level below her lips because well then I'd be dealing with a distraction far greater than if I just kept staring into her eyes. =P

 

[BaronUberstein]

No. I can't focus on two eyes at once. So I pick one eye and look at that.

 

[Beffudled Sheep_v1legacy]

I was taught to always look someone in the eye when speaking with them. It is a sign of respect and confidence (or so I've been taught). I've heard other cultures than mine consider eye contact rude or not important though.

Even though I was taught to always look someone in the eyes when speaking I usually have a hard time doing so because my eyes are always trying to focus solely on things that move, like the person's mouth. Very hard to keep my eyes on stationary object when something is moving nearby. Also have a lot of trouble if there are other people/cars/whatever in the same area because I tend on constantly watching those around me cuz of slight paranoia.